Ranma chan, the Cat
by Noy Telin'u
Summary: In an AU, Ranma is born female and due to Genma's infertility, an only child. He steals her and raises Ranma as male. Genma takes her to Jusenkyo, but unlike others fails to throw her into the spring of drowned man, instead, a spring much worse, for him. Ranma, now with a cat curse is on the run, looking for her mother with Genma on her heels, obsessively wanting a son.
1. Prologue

Ranma-chan, the Cat

~Noy Telinú~

**Warning:** the following is fanfiction. Noy doesn't own the stuff, but, as usual, borrowing it without permission. I said it was a bad idea, but nooooo, Noy doesn't listen to me and writes this anyway. I don't even know what it's going to be about. Wait, what? Really? Oh yes! Oh, I'm loving this now! Hehe. Thanks Noy.

**Caution:** this involves screwing up the whole story of Canon. If you don't like that, then go away. Shoo.

**Thanks!:** to tuatara and Kris Leena as usual.

**Lesbians:** Telinú is a yuri fan. While Noy is trying to reel that in, keep in mind that Telinú cheated. Naughty Telinú. You are a very naughty… person, personality, thing… damn it. Some lesbians may seep through the cracks, so… be careful.

**Merry new year!:** 2012 starts off with this brand new story! Yay!

You have been warned…

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**Prologue:** the story that changes the story.

16 years and 7 days ago, a child was born to a loving couple. When the mother was almost due, they decided on a name. No matter the gender, the child was to be named Ranma. For some reason, they didn't find out the gender before the birth. Due to circumstances of a 'not telling you until later in the story' way, the couple of Genma and Nodoka Saotome had a daughter. Now, Nodoka didn't care that she had a daughter, but her husband Genma did. Genma wanted an heir to marry off to the Tendos, which he couldn't since Ranma was a girl. That and the Tendo's were all girls. Over the next 2 years, Genma and Nodoka tried to conceive a son, but nothing worked. Due to weird circumstances, or just bad luck, they never were able to conceive a son. Out of desperation, Genma stole tiny Ranma and took her on a training trip to be the best martial artist, and to find a way to make her male. To say that Nodoka was pissed was the understatement of the century.

Every month, Genma would send postcards to Nodoka telling her how he and Ranma were doing on their training trip. It irritated Nodoka to have that happen. She tried to find them, but, alas, Genma was too good at hiding for her. Genma finally found a place, a place to get his son 'back' a place called Jusenkyo.

Now being a Genma in any universe makes you irrational, but if there is a Genma who is trying to turn his daughter into a son in any way possible, well, things get messy.

So here we are, back to the present. One week after Ranma's 16th birthday…

"Here we go Ranma, the valley of Jusenkyo." Genma spoke to his daughter.

"It doesn't look so bad." Ranma replied, shrugging off her pack. "Why are we here again?"

"This place corrects wrongs, and turns you into what you meant to be."

Ranma rolled her eyes. "Whatever you say pops."

Unlike versions of the past, this Ranma was born female, had black hair, had it in a pigtail already (reasons revealed soon enough), and wore breast bindings. All in all, she could pass as a guy very well, a bishonen guy, but male nonetheless. Even if the 'guy' in question was only four foot eleven, or, as the rest of the world uses, one hundred and fifty centimeters tall.

You see, because Genma wanted a son, so he looked for something to turn his daughter into one. Unfortunately for Ranma, this meant being raised as a boy in every sense. Ranma thought that she was a he all the way up until a certain sex-ed class. She realized something was wrong at age 10, and confirmed that she was always a girl at age 13.

Instead of being told that she was always a girl, Genma told her that she was cursed to be a girl right before they left on their training trip. Ranma didn't believe it, especially since all Genma could come up with was a wizard did it. Not that she could do anything, mind you. It didn't help that she had some doubts about being a girl, or even if it might be true that she wasn't supposed to be a she. Nevertheless, she continued to go to all boys' school and make it look like she was agreeing with him until she could find out the truth.

The black haired teen jumped on the pole after her father.

"I'm not going to go easy on you boy!"

"I've got you this time pops!"

The two clashed in the air, doing tricks and maneuvers that most couldn't. Genma got Ranma in a hold and threw her towards a spring. Ranma grabbed onto one of the poles and launched herself back at Genma, kicking him off his pole, causing him to land on another.

"You think that'll work?" Ranma smirked as she kicked the pole under him, causing Genma to launch back into the fight.

That is when the guide came running from his hut, untying himself from a rope.

"Mr. Customers, don't do it! This is very bad!" The guide yelled as he ran, almost tripping over.

"What is he talking about Pop?" Ranma asked, looking over at the guide for a second.

Genma smirked and used that distraction to knock Ranma through the air, heading for the spring of drowned man.

Genma was filled with glee as Ranma sailed through the air. Now his journey will be complete, and he would have an heir worthy to marry a Tendo, then he could live in luxury.

However, while sailing through the air, Ranma grazed a bamboo pole, altering her direction into a different spring, one of drowned cat.

*Splash*

"Oh no! Mr. Customer pushed other into spring!" The guide said as he ran to find Ranma.

'Oh no… NO! Now I'll have to throw my worthless 'why couldn't he be a son' into it again. Oh well, just one more dunk and I'll have a son.' Genma thought as he jumped down off the pole.

Things were going through Ranma's mind; she was changing into something, something furry. It took seven seconds before she broke the surface of the water.

"Ayiah! Customer fall into spring of drowned cat, whoever falls in spring takes body of a cat. Customer taking long time…"

Right when he was saying that, Ranma leaped out of the water and slashed Genma, clothes splitting apart as the man ran.

'Why, out of all of the springs did it have to be a cat?' Genma thought as he ran for his life.

As Genma ran, Ranma chased after him, the red furred cat eventually knocking him into a spring.

'Hmm… why did the customer have red fur? It should be black… ayaih, not again.'

"Mr. Customer fall into spring of drowned Panda. Now whoever fall in spring turn into Panda."

The panda ran as the cat chased him. He quickly grabbed the bags when they came by them as he was chased out of the valley towards a village…

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It was the day of the tournament, Shampoo of the village of Women warriors was getting ready to fight when she felt something, something, off. She shook her head. She needed to concentrate. Still, no matter what she did, she couldn't shake the feeling completely that her life was to change very drastically.

{Shampoo? It's about to start. You are needed out there.} Cologne spoke to Shampoo in mandarin Chinese.

{Yes great grandmother, I'm ready.}

{I expect you to win you know} She smirked.

{Of course I'll win, Great Grandmother.} Shampoo replied arrogantly.

Cologne laughed happily as she poggoed off on her staff.

That's when she felt it, felt something that will make her life… interesting.

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Ryoga Hibiki scowled as he looked over the cliff; he was so close to Ranma now.

Ever since Ranma left him on the third day, Ryoga has been following 'him'. What made it worse was that Ryoga got those weird feelings each time he saw Ranma. He didn't know what that meant, but it made him want to get revenge even more.

He heard some yelling in the valley below and decided to hurry in order to find Ranma.

Therefore, it was only appropriate for him to go exactly the wrong way from which he needed to go…

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Ranma the cat finally got tired enough to sleep halfway between Jusenkyo and the Amazon village. Genma the panda was relived, although was tired too and fell asleep as well.

The guide helped them return to human right as they woke up.

"Naa… where am I? Pops? Huh, what happened to me, why am I wet?" Ranma asked, rubbing her eye.

Ranma's eyes sprung wide open as she looked around, she had a blanket over her and Genma was already dressed while the guide was looking away.

Finding her clothes next to her, she quickly put on a gi.

"Boy, we have to go back." Genma told Ranma, coming over towards her after she put on her clothes.

"Why? That place was boring, and weird… memories…" Ranma muttered.

"Are you alright Miss customer? You turn to cat and freaked out." The guide spoke up, eyes not facing away.

"Wait, what? What happened old man?" Ranma was right on top of him, furious.

"I have no idea what he's talking about." Genma lied.

"Miss Customer forget that she push Customer into Panda spring, no?" The guide was helping… somewhat.

"Huh?" Ranma asked, confused.

"See Miss Customer." The guide threw water onto Genma, who growled. "Spring turn you into what drown in it. He knock you into cat, you knock him into panda, remember no?"

"What? I turn into a cat?" A shiver went down her back. "Why did you take me to a place like that you… you… no… NO!" It made sense to Ranma now, what she has been told her whole life was that she was born a boy but somehow turned into a girl. Now it was clear that it was all a lie. Her father tried to make her a boy for years and now was at a place to do so. She was born as a girl all along.

"YOU TRIED TO TURN ME INTO A BOY!" She shrieked.

"Ah yes, Mr. Customer asked where spring of drown man was. Tie me up to no stop. Very foolish Mr. Customer, you doom yourself. Too bad."

"Growlf!"

"This was all planned?" Ranma asked, not wanting to believe.

"Your guess as good as mine Miss Customer, though I think yes. Look like plan failed, yes?"

"POP!"

"Growlff!" Genma freaked and threw cold water onto Ranma.

Ranma was now a red cat again, irritated, she Jumped at him, only to see that she was a cat, and was overcome.

That only meant more pain for Genma though as the cat attacked him ferociously, more than before, causing him to run off towards the Amazon village.

Ranma didn't give up though, no, the basic mind was going to kill that panda.

Pity anyone who gets in her way.

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Fifteen days later… (yes, what happened would be revealed eventually.)

Ranma woke up on the shoulder of a panda, wearing loose silk clothes. Grumbling, she turned to see many, many springs.

"Pop! What are you doing?"

[I'm having a son, whether you like it or not!] A sign read from his hands.

"No you're not! Put me down!"

"Hey, have you seen…" a boy in a yellow and black bandana asked, head in a map.

*splash* before he was knocked into a spring by the Panda.

Ranma didn't notice; she was too busy struggling against the Panda.

"Stop it old man!"

"Mr. Customer come back, yes? Me no help this time. You find spring on your own." The guide sat in his hut, smoking a pipe, talking to himself.

"Put me down! I'm a girl! I was always a girl! You lied to me the whole time!"

Ranma struggled as Genma threw his daughter into a spring, well, that was the plan, she held onto a bamboo pole for dear life.

"Pops!" Her hair turned red, and her eyes went blue, deep blue.

"Greolf?" Genma was confused, what was happening? Why was Ranma looking like her mother even more? Why can't anything go right?

Ranma launched herself at the Panda, furious.

The fighting ensued looked more like a beat down, and that's when something flew out of his fur.

Ranma caught it on reflex, and her eyes went big, her hands shook as she looked at the photo.

"That… that… that's me." Ranma said to herself, mostly in a trance. She turned it around and saw a message.

Genma and Nodoka Saotome with their daughter son, Ranma. (the daughter was crossed out.)

"I** was** born a girl, and that's mom. WHAT DID YOU DO TO HER?"

Genma the Panda stood up, mad as hell.

[Get! IN! THE! SPRING!]

"You're not going to stop me POP! I'll find Mom! You won't stop me!" Ranma ran off, taking her things with her while being chased by a Panda.

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**Author's notes:** This is another odd story. Noy said that this one was going to start odd, but Ranma being born a girl and not getting a male curse is pretty rare. I think it is crazy though. How often to you see a born as a girl Ranma and doesn't have a boy curse? I know I saw one where he was turned into a boy and another where it went all DBZ out of nowhere, but not like what Noy is planning. Or was it Telinú? Oh, yeah, I forgot… Noy writes what Telinú comes up with and makes it make sense… usually. This was like twice as long… but that's when Telinú got mad at what was happening as story wise, it gave too much, too fast. So… now instead you are kept guessing. Why did Ranma's hair change color? What happened at the Amazon village? Why was it cut? Will these questions be answered? What happened to Shampoo? Ryoga? Uh… to tell the truth… I don't know.


	2. I

Ranma-chan, the Cat

~Noy Telinú~

**Warning:** this is fanfiction. Fanfiction contains words, ideas, borrowing characters and settings without permission, confusion and destroying the things that were borrowed. If you are allergic to these, then please, don't read. It might just kill you.

**Caution:** contains cats and girls. Catgirls? I don't know, who do I look like, Telinú?

**Alert:** this is messed up. Like, seriously messed up. If you have complaints that this doesn't go that way or that can't do that, or my favorite character didn't get with my other favorite character, then please, leave. If its one thing I can't stand as text, are shippers. Arrrgggg! I barely survived some of Noy's other stories only because it came slowly and realistically. And I will be dammed if relationships happen fast. Especially if they become all mushy for no reason. Really, a manga like Ranma ½ is not going to have any character get all crazy romanticized on each other unless magic is involved. Oh and I came into an agreement that Akane will be treated like a human and not a monster ultra violent whiny brat. So, ha! Still, Telinú was a jerk and slipped in that no one is safe from reasonable ridicule. Curse you Telinú!

You have been warned…

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_**I**_**:** It's a good thing you're a girl.

I know, right?

It was a rainy day in northern Tokyo. This was perfectly normal for the area. It was due to this rainstorm that the mail was delayed ever so much. Oh well, it wasn't important to get some high priority mail from China there before the other one that was sent the day before, right?

On one of the streets of northern Tokyo was… something. It was small, and black, and a cat. However, this cat was headed towards southern Tokyo. Instead, a red cat came across another street, only because that other cat was there. The rain was annoying, though.

The red cat was carrying a red knapsack strapped to its back and there was a picture in its mouth.

The cat was breathing heavily, eyes darting all over. Its ears twitched and then the cat bolted onto a wall and ran.

Coming out from behind the mist was a panda, a mad panda. If a panda could look mad. It was carrying a huge pack. After looking around, the panda went on to the next street.

The cat was already far away, running randomly, trying to find someone, someone that it instinctively knew but couldn't remember. At least the storm was moving past now.

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Not much farther south, a man was reading a postcard. This postcard had a panda on one side and words on the other. However, these words wouldn't be so familiar to pretty much anyone.

[Plan FTM China initiated. 100% biological. Should be done by tomorrow.]

-Genma Saotome

'It works?' the man thought, tears coming down his face. 'Let's see, uh, bub ity bu buh, they should be coming here TODAY! I got this right in time. The schools shall be joined! The plan worked! What a glorious day! But that means I have to tell them soon.'

"Kasumi!" the man called out.

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A few blocks away, a certain red cat was dashing on walls and fences, running as if hell was upon it. It seemed that it had good reason to, since behind it was a panda.

Panic was on the cat's face as it rounded a corner, eyes darting around as it looked for someplace to hide.

The panda behind the cat seemed exhausted, but was not slowing up a bit. However, as it turned the corner, its eyes went wide as it seemed to panic.

The cat was faring no better and one could see some blood in that red fur. On the brink of collapse, the cat saw a high wall and jumped over, looking to lose the panda in the foliage of the place.

It seemed to work when, two blocks behind, the panda slowed to a stop. The cat didn't know why the panda stopped, or that it did stop, since the cat had run for its nine lives.

A window was open up ahead and the cat, using the last of its energy, jumped through it, barely fitting, backpack and all.

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Akane couldn't believe it; she or one of her sisters was going to be engaged to some guy. If that wasn't bad enough, a panda came through the front door! What was the world coming to? It ran off after looking around a bit, but honestly, a panda came! After her father failed to say any other facts about this 'Ranma' guy, she left. Nabiki could have him for all she cared.

"But… Akane!" her father Soun cried out.

"No, Dad!" Akane shouted as she walked away.

"Akane, at least take a bath. Guests are coming soon," Kasumi told her sister in a 'do as I say, 'cause I'm Kasumi' way.

"Oh, alright," Akane sighed as she left to take a bath.

"Alright, is he rich?" Nabiki asked her father.

"I told you I don't know anything!" Soun whined.

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The little red cat, after about thirty minutes of resting, got enough strength to slide out from under her pack and put its photo on top of it.

Barely seeing anything, the cat took a few steps forward, but collapsed, falling into deep, needed sleep next to a furo of all things.

A few feet away, Akane Tendo was mumbling to herself.

"Stupid… mumble, mumble… engagement… mumble, mumble… Ranma… mumble, mumble…"

She stepped out of her martial arts gi and opened the door to the inner bath.

A short gasp escaped and she quickly covered her mouth with her hands as she took in the sight before her.

A red cat lay half curled up next to the furo. She didn't notice a pack or a photo. All she saw was a red cat, and blood.

In a quiet calming voice, Akane picked up and tried her best to soothe the cat.

"There, there, are you hurt? Oh, poor baby. What are you doing here?"

Now, Akane did have troubles with animals. That was probably why she didn't own a pet. They kept on dying. So when Akane saw the bloody cat, she did what she always did with injured animals: bathe them in the furo.

Deciding to kill two birds with one stone, Akane climbed into the hot water after it finally warmed up and gently brought the red cat down into the water.

The shriek was loud and went though the entire house.

After breathing in and out to calm herself, she found the she was now supporting a young girl from not drowning. Soon, footsteps were heard outside the bathroom.

"Akane, are you alright in there?" Soun Tendo asked, concerned about his daughter.

"Yes, it was nothing," Akane blurted out, mind racing on what to do.

"Are you sure? My ears are still ringing," Nabiki said, irritated.

"Nope, everything's fine, yeah, hehehe. Nothing to see here, move along!" Akane was losing her composure fast.

"Geeze, Akane is scared of something again. Just keep it down or you're paying for my hearing aid!" Nabiki threatened.

"Father, someone's at the door," Kasumi said as she poked her head into the hallway.

"Ooh! It must be Ranma! Hey sis, don't take too long, OK?" Nabiki said as they left the door.

'What do I do? What do I do? Uh, uh… maybe if I wake her up? She doesn't look like a demon. And *gasp* there's blood coming from her back. What happened to her? How is this possible?'

Akane gently leaned the redhead girl against the edge of the furo as she climbed out, and looked for bandages.

Returning later with them, she laid a towel on the floor and placed the girl on it. Blood was seeping into the towel as Akane hurried.

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"So, he's lost?" Soun asked the man in front of him.

"Yes. I've been searching for him. He… ran off a while ago," the guest responded.

"I see. We'll do everything we can to find him."

"So what does Ranma look like?" Nabiki asked, understanding what was happening.

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A while later, Akane stood up off the floor and studied her handiwork on nursing.

It wasn't that good, to say the least. The way everything was constricted made it hard for the redhead to breathe. She was still out though.

*Cough*

Until that last breath.

The girl's eyes sprung open, staring right into Akane's.

Akane was on her knees straddling her and put a hand over the girl's mouth before she could scream.

"Shhh… be quiet. You want them to hear you?" Akane whispered.

The girl flipped Akane over and was now on top of her.

"What is going on?" the girl whispered as she looked around the room, keeping firm hands on the slightly larger girl's shoulders.

"Shouldn't I be asking you that?" Akane responded.

"What did you ack-."

The girl fell over in pain.

"Are you alright?" Akane asked as she got up.

The girl ripped off the bandage from her side.

"Guhaha… *cough* where am I?" she asked from the floor.

"You're in my bathroom. Why are you here, anyway?"

"I…" She tilted her head and her eyes went wide. "Oh no! He's here!"

"Who?" Akane asked nervously.

"Listen," the girl said as she tried to catch her breath.

Akane listened and only heard her father talking to some man…

"Are you a runaway?" Akane asked, surprised.

"No! Yes, well, no, not really, yes?" the girl responded as she crawled over to her bag, still too tired from all that running to do much else.

"So he did that to you?"

"Did what?"

"You're bleeding."

"Huh?" She looked at herself and saw a big gash on her back. "Wonder why I don't feel… oh, now I do…" She collapsed.

Akane was fretting nervously. Whoever this girl was, she must have been abused by that guy outside; no wonder she was running away. Akane got another towel and made the girl comfortable while she tried to figure out what to do. After wavering a bit, she got dressed and left to try to convince that guy that the girl he was searching for wasn't there.

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"See, that's what you have to do, Daddy. A picture is worth a thousand words, after all," Nabiki said while studying the black and white photo of Ranma.

"Does he know about the engagement?" Soun asked his friend.

"I don't think so," his friend answered.

Akane was meanwhile listening from the hallway.

'They're looking for Ranma. That's good. The redhead girl can relax now. She's safe from whoever is looking for her.'

Akane slipped back into the bathroom to see the girl awakening.

"Good news," she whispered to the injured girl. "It's not who you think it is."

The girl relaxed as she put a hand to her head. "That's good. Thank you, uh…"

"I'm Akane Tendo," Akane told the girl, helping her up as she reached an arm out.

"Ranma Saotome. Sorry about this," the girl said.

"Wait, what?" Akane asked, still holding the girl's hand.

"My name's Ranma Saotome. I think I'm feeling a bit better now," Ranma let go and walked gingerly towards her knapsack.

"But, wait… you're supposed to be a guy!" Akane said.

"You're in on it too?" Ranma got into a fighting stance.

"No, wait… I'm confused… I'm not doing what you think I'm doing… uh… it's just… that… um… Dad said you were a boy… and that man said he was looking for his son, Ranma. I am not doing whatever you think I'm doing."

Ranma dropped the stance. "So he doesn't know I'm here. I gotta hide." She reached her knapsack.

"So, why does he say that you're a boy?"

"He tried to turn me into one," Ranma said as she dug through her knapsack.

"What?"

"Yeah… long story, you've gotta hide me." She pulled out boxers and Chinese clothes. They looked a bit big on her.

"Are you sure you don't turn into a boy? You were a cat earlier." Akane got nervous.

"No, that was his screw up." Ranma fell to her knees as she held her side.

"How do you turn into a cat?" Akane asked.

"Mumble, mumble, cold water, mumble, mumble."

"What was that?"

"Cold water. I… I can't keep running…" She collapsed again.

"Poor girl." Akane got a bucket of cold water and splashed it on the bleeding girl, turning her into the bleeding cat from earlier.

"Hey Akane, Ranma's dad came over. He's missing… ran away or something. He's cute, though," Nabiki said as she opened the outer bath.

Panicking, Akane stuffed Ranma's clothes and Ranma wrapped in a towel into the knapsack and hid it behind her back as she opened the screen door to see Nabiki undressing.

"Hey, sis, here is what he looks like." Nabiki showed the photo to Akane.

It was a black and white photo of Ranma taken for a school picture.

Ranma really looked male.

Akane nodded and slipped out, red knapsack behind her hands.

She hurried to her room, glad not to see Ranma's father anywhere, and placed the knapsack on her bed. She opened it up, to see nothing.

"What? Wait… huh?" She flipped the knapsack over and didn't see anything come out. She didn't see any holes in it, but a closer look showed her a black Chinese dragon design on the red knapsack with two medium-sized pockets on one side.

She was pulled out of her stupor when she heard a scream.

"There is blood in the furo!" Nabiki screamed from downstairs.

Akane let go of the knapsack and ran to the bathroom.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

When Genma Saotome left the house, he gave Soun an envelope.

Soun was puzzled and was about to open it when he heard Nabiki's scream.

Akane was already in there, getting plastered by Nabiki.

Thankfully, everyone had clothes on.

Blood was all over the bathroom. The furo itself was saturated in blood. Akane has a bit of blood on her gi and a towel had a huge bloodspot on it. There was blood, lots and lots of blood.

"Oh my!" was an appropriate response.

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All of the Tendos were around the table now, questioning Akane.

"Why is there blood in the furo?" Soun question his daughter.

"I… err…" Akane tried to think fast, she didn't want to say that she found Ranma, or that Ranma was a girl. They wouldn't believe that all that blood came from a small animal, or would they? "There was an animal in there, and that's why I screamed." 'Yeah, that's good, and it's the truth.' "He-he."

"So you killed an animal in the bathroom?" Nabiki raised her eyebrow.

"Well, you see…" Akane thought fast, she needed something believable. "There was a cat… a large cat… that was injured. I tried to help treat it… but, it attacked and escaped… so I screamed." 'There, that's convincing enough.'

"Oh my!" Kasumi put a hand to her head. "Akane, I know your history with animals…" Akane winced. "You shouldn't try to heal them yourself. Remember that dog that broke its leg last month?"

"I said I was sorry!" Akane said in a raised voice, hands in the air.

"All that blood was from a cat?" Nabiki asked, suspicious.

"Uh… yes? It was a big cat…" Akane tried to get the nervousness out of her voice.

"Whaaa! My baby got attacked by a cat!" Soun cried out.

"Dad!" Akane was a bit relived to get the attention off of her.

Nabiki sighed and rubbed her forehead.

"Father…" Kasumi rolled her eyes, thinking more on what happened in the bathroom.

Akane felt like she might be off the hook… for now.

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As soon as she could, Akane got back to her room… just in time to see a red cat crawling out of the knapsack.

Realizing who it was, Akane rushed over to her bed and helped the cat get out.

Laying the cat on the towel that was in her mouth, Akane was about to ask Ranma about the knapsack when she realized that she was still a cat. Not that it mattered, since Ranma lost consciousness again.

'Ok, this is bad… bad, very bad. I need to get Ranma human… how do I do that? She lost a lot of blood… think, Akane, think! How did she do it the first time? It was the furo! So that means… water… but cold water made her a cat… so, hot water changes her back! I need to find some! Um… the furo is bloody… the kitchen!'

Akane left for the kitchen as fast as she could.

Upon arriving, she found a teakettle on the stove.

Doing what she felt was necessary; she took the teakettle and hurried back to her room.

Akane arrived back in her room with more bandages and other medical supplies. Fixing Ranma the cat in the right way, she poured steaming hot water all over her, changing the red cat into a redheaded girl.

No time to wonder how this could happen, Akane dove into trying to bandage Ranma again.

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Meanwhile, in the bathroom…

Kasumi was busy cleaning up after her sister's mess when she saw something in the corner of the bathroom.

Deciding to not dirty it with blood, she waited until after cleaning the room before picking up the object.

It was a photo of a couple with a child. She couldn't place the child or the woman, but the man looked just like the man who came that day… with hair.

Turning the photo over confirmed it. Handwritten were the words [Genma and Nodoka Saotome with their daughter son, Ranma.] the word daughter was crossed out.

"Oh my!"

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Akane was panicking now. Ranma was breathing irregularly due to Akane putting the bandage on wrong, forcing the blue-haired teen to take it off, only to irritate the wound so it wouldn't close.

Out of options, she dashed off to get help from Kasumi. It was the only way to save the girl's life.

Akane opened her bedroom door, only to find Kasumi about to knock.

"Akane?" Kasumi asked, right before she was pulled into the room and the door slammed behind her.

"Kasumi! I need your help! She's injured!" Akane pushed Kasumi over to the bed where Ranma lay unmoving, blood seeping onto the towel.

"Oh my!"

"Please! Help!"

Kasumi blinked out of her surprise and fixed up the wound.

A successful bandaging later…

Akane looked on while Kasumi felt Ranma's forehead. The blue-haired girl paced back and forth nervously.

"Is she alright?" Akane asked, looking very worried.

"She'll be fine… but Akane, how much blood did she lose in the bathroom?" Kasumi turned to look at her sister as she continued to feel Ranma's head.

"You know about that?"

"Akane, please answer the question."

"I don't know; she was bleeding a lot and it was dripping! I tried to bandage it a few times, but…" Akane was struggling to hold back tears.

Kasumi walked over to Akane and requested, "Start from the beginning."

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"…And that's when you were at the door," Akane finished her tale, leaving out the fact that she knew that the girl was Ranma, and the 'turning into a cat' detail.

"I need to tell father…" Kasumi started to walk away.

"No! You can't tell anyone! She… she's been abused, I know it. Her father has done terrible things to her!"

"So, you are saying that we don't tell father that Ranma is here?"

"…What! Who! I… How did?"

"It was obvious, little sister. She looks like the girl in the school picture. That and this was in the bathroom." She pulled out the photo of the Saotomes. "She looks just like her mother…"

"OK, she told me she was Ranma… but we can't tell Dad! Who knows what will happen! His friend tried to turn his daughter into a boy! We can't let him take her back!" Akane pleaded.

"Akane…"

"Please, Kasumi! She almost died! I can't let him take her back! She ran away from him! Please!" Akane was now in tears.

"I'll tell Father tomorrow, but she will not go back with Mr. Saotome. I'll make sure no one bothers you tonight. Now, dinner will be made shortly, but now the the water for our tea is cold." Kasumi looked towards the teakettle in the room. "Why did you bring the teakettle in here, Akane?"

"Uh… I tried to warm Ranma up? But why are you telling, Kasumi!"

"You have got to trust Father; besides, he can start up a search for Ranma's mother."

"Are you sure she'll be safe?" Akane sniffled.

"Yes, but now she needs her rest."

With that, Kasumi took the teakettle and pulled Akane downstairs.

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Hours later, when it was quite dark, Akane returned to her room to sleep. Seeing Ranma there with only the sheets over her reminded Akane that Ranma was still hurt. Unsure of what to do, she started to look over Ranma's knapsack, trying to figure out how could it work and who this Ranma was. It didn't help that she knew next to nothing on both accounts.

Getting a feel for the knapsack, she got to see it in more detail than before. It was 68 ½ centimeters long by 25.4 centimeters wide (27 by 10 inches). Akane could easily see it fit on the cat, but the magical part escaped her.

Putting it down, she next looked at the photo of Ranma's family.

Seeing a young two-year-old Ranma with her parents pulled at Akane's heartstrings. Yet, putting a name and a face to Ranma's abuser made her blood boil. Upon seeing the writing on the back, she felt even more determined to keep Ranma safe from her father. Putting the look and name of Ranma's mother into memory, she vowed in her head to find Ranma's mother.

She put the photo down on top of the knapsack and walked over to Ranma, who was still not moving on Akane's bed. It was unfortunate that she couldn't figure out how to get stuff out of the knapsack, since Ranma was still nude. Surprisingly for Akane, besides the back wound, there were no other marks or scars on the redhead girl. Now that Akane could see her up close without hurrying to do something, she noticed that Ranma had a slightly bigger bust than her own.

Shaking her head to get rid of the sliver of jealousy, she turned back to her closet to find something that would fit Ranma.

It was while rummaging through her closet that there was a knock on her door.

"Akane?" Kasumi's voice was heard.

Akane opened the door and invited Kasumi in.

"Here's the futon, Akane. Has she woken up yet?"

"No… I'm worried. I was just trying to find clothes to fit her…"

"No. Don't. You shouldn't try to dress someone who's injured that bad. The blankets would do."

"Alright, Kasumi." Akane set up her futon, not wanting to harm the still-unconscious girl.

Kasumi left the room and Akane got ready for bed.

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Akane walked to school the next morning, concerned for Ranma. She hadn't woken up since she crawled out of her bag the night before and it was worrying. Kasumi told her that everything would be alright and she wouldn't tell anyone until Akane returned from school, although their father needed to know that Ranma was there and that she was staying for a while.

Akane shook her head and walked faster. She should be able to trust her father, shouldn't she?

One thing was for sure: the boys at school were going to be pounded a little harder that day.

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Meanwhile, Kasumi was busy making sure Ranma was comfortable. She'd been out for over twelve hours already. Still, she was breathing regularly, so that was good.

Carefully turning the smaller girl over, Kasumi took off the old bandage to put on a new one.

However, instead of seeing a wound that was the size of a large steak as it was when she found her, it was only a few centimeters wide. The recovery rate for Ranma shocked Kasumi, but she was glad that she was healing quickly. The poor girl had it tough. So all Kasumi had to do was replace the bandage and tuck the girl back in.

Kasumi then left. It was a good thing Father was gone, out looking for Ranma. He was in such a hurry to find Ranma that he didn't even read the letter Mr. Saotome gave him.

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At 1:17, or nineteen hours since Kasumi wrapped her up, Ranma awoke on a strange bed. Well, strange to her, anyway. Her eyes flickered open after blinking a few times to readjust to the daylight.

She put a hand to her eyes to help and sat up.

'Where am I?' she wondered. After her eyesight returned in full, she started to panic.

She was in someone's room. Naked.

Quickly, she got out of Akane's bed, and hit the floor.

*Smack*

Ranma had lost a lot of blood; there was no way she was going to get the strength to get out of the house, but she would try.

So she crawled, snakelike on the floor towards her knapsack.

She was almost to Akane's dresser when Kasumi opened the door.

"Oh my! You're out of bed. You do recover fast," Kasumi smiled.

"I… uh… where am I?" Ranma asked nervously.

"You're in Akane's bedroom. Here, let's get you back in bed. You've lost a lot of blood recently and you do need to rest."

"I…" She looked into Kasumi's gentle eyes. "OK, but, who are you?"

"I'm Kasumi Tendo, Akane's sister. Now, please, give me your hand."

Ranma was helped back into bed and was given her knapsack.

"Please rest, Ranma. Oh, and I found this in the bathroom. I believe it's yours." She handed Ranma her photo.

Rama, holding back teary eyes, took the photo in her hands and caressed it in her chest. "Thank you. *cough* Uh… sorry about that."

"Not at all," Kasumi answered. "If you need any help, just ask. Oh my! You must be hungry. When was the last time you ate?"

Before she could respond, Kasumi left.

Breathing heavily, the redhead looked around the room, studying where the hiding places were and where the window was.

'I can't stay long,' she thought as she took in more of the details of Akane's room.

The red-haired girl had never been inside a girl's bedroom before. Well, more accurately a regular bedroom occupied by a girl normally that was allowed to be girlish.

So it came as a surprise to her that while it did have various girlish things and trimmings, there were plenty of objects and items that wouldn't be considered especially feminine.

A martial arts poster and a few dumbbells by the desk were strong indicators of this.

'It isn't what I expected,' Ranma thought as she studied the room carefully. 'Then again, I can count the number of girls I've met on one hand. Stupid Pops! All because you wanted the perfect son I don't know anything about being a girl!'

Calming her breathing down, she stared into the photo once again.

'I'll find you, Mom. Then we can be a family and you'll be proud of me.' She pressed it against her cheek. 'Please be alright…'

Wiping away the rest of her tears, Ranma put the photo into her knapsack.

"Ranma?" Kasumi entered the room, food in hand. "I have food for you."

Ranma, meanwhile, was hiding under the covers.

Kasumi closed the door, placing the tray of food on the dresser. A sharp pain nagged her heart and soul upon seeing the fear in the young girl.

"Please, Ranma… eat," Kasumi pleaded with the girl, pulling back the covers so that she could see her head.

Her eyes closed, Ranma took in a deep breath before answering. "Sorry… I… never mind."

Kasumi was distraught at the answer. "Was it really that bad?"

Ranma opened her eyes to look at the older girl who was towering above her. "Was what how bad?"

"Your father abusing you," Kasumi answered, looking over the redhead's face for signs of abuse.

Said girl's eyes widened. "Who told you that?"

"Akane said you ran from your father." Kasumi oddly couldn't find anything out of the ordinary about Ranma's facial features. No scars, marks or bruises. 'She did heal fast, though.'

Ranma let out a sigh and turned her head away from Kasumi. "Yeah, so what?"

"I'm just concerned for you…"

Ranma held back her tongue. 'She's just being nice… just like… alright… I can do this… all she sees is an abused girl running away from a father… I need to change that soon.'

"I know you are trying to be tough." Kasumi took a hold of Ranma's shoulders. "But I can see that you are hurt inside as well as outside. Please don't be afraid to cry. Let it out if you need to. He can't get you here. It's alright to cry."

"I don't need to," Ranma simply stated, not making eye contact with Kasumi.

'Akane was right; her father did try to make her into a boy.' Kasumi felt worse by the moment for the girl. 'Or, she's just more stubborn than Akane…' "At least eat; you haven't eaten for nearly a whole day, at least."

Ranma's stomach growled at that comment.

"Food sounds good," Ranma admitted, still sullen.

Kasumi nodded and gathered the tray, setting it before Ranma. "I hope you do better; please eat, then rest. You have had it rough in the last twenty-four hours."

Kasumi then left the room, closing the door on the way out.

"Thank you," Ranma whispered before digging in.

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Akane raced home after school, scared that something could have happened.

'Maybe her dad is a wizard and messed up the spell!' Akane thought up explanations for what happened to Ranma.

'Or maybe she was his cat that did those things cats do around magic people and he wanted a son!' Akane continued to think up crazier ways on how Ranma was a cat.

"Growlf!" a panda complained as it was pushed over.

"Sorry, panda!" Akane apologized as she sped past.

The panda stood up on its hind legs and dusted itself off.

"Greowlf gref" it muttered before continuing its search for its son-who-dared-not-to-be-male.

'I should probably call the zoo and tell them the panda is here,' Akane thought as she continued to run home.

With a turn around a corner, Akane burst through the gate, announcing her arrival.

"Kasumi, I'm home!" she shouted, pausing only to take off her shoes at the door.

"I _thought_ that was you, Akane," Kasumi smiled as she called from the kitchen. "Father is out looking for Ranma, so you don't have to worry for now."

Akane let out a sigh of relief. "Thanks for not telling yet, Kasumi."

"I'm afraid that I will soon, little sister," Kasumi warned.

Akane grunted in acceptance as she went up to her room.

"So alike…" Kasumi shook her head.

Akane stood at the door to her room, calming herself in order to not scare the pigtailed girl.

*Knock knock*

"Ranma? Are you feeling well? It's me, Akane," she called.

"I'm fine," Ranma answered immediately. "It's your room, come in."

Akane did just that, walking in on Ranma in a red Chinese silk shirt and blackish-blue drawstring pants, stretching her muscles.

*Blink blink* Akane blinked her eyes in surprise at seeing Ranma this well.

"What?" Ranma looked down at herself, not noticing anything different about her bound breasts and loose shirt. "Do I have something on my face?"

"No, it's just… I'm surprised you're up," Akane admitted.

"Hey, I'm not weak you know!" Ranma crossed her arms over her chest, eyebrows scrunching downward.

"I didn't say you were!" Akane spat out. "You were wounded terribly this morning and I come home and you are all right? Am I not supposed to be surprised?"

"It was just a scratch…" Ranma grunted. "Just because I'm a girl doesn't mean I can't take it."

"Hey, I didn't mean it like that!" Akane rebutted. "I'm a martial artist; I fight all the time. I know that some girls can handle getting injured."

Ranma let out a sigh of relief. "Thank goodness someone in this family is. I don't know how much more of this I could take if I was surrounded by girly girls."

"Um, you're welcome?" Akane answered questionably. 'Wow… she's a tomboy. Wait… is she implying I'm like that? Arrgg! I try to be more ladylike. I try! I try! I try!'

Akane shook her head. "So, are you a martial artist as well?"

Ranma smirked. "I'm the best."

"Oh really? Would you like to spar then?" Akane smiled. "I'll put you to the test."

"You're on!" Ranma accepted, momentarily forgetting her troubles in light of the news that she would be doing something that she's good at.

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"I see. Then… we must move to plan C," Soun sighed as he talked with Genma at a coffee shop.

"Yes, it would have been better if you'd just read the letter, Tendo," Genma scolded.

"I forgot about it…" Soun scratched his head nervously.

"So, we go at dawn?" Genma asked.

"That'll work for me," Soun paused. "What if Ranma ends up coming while we're gone?"

"We send him to school with your girls," Genma purposefully misspoke his child's gender. "That way he would stay put."

"I'll tell them. We leave in the morning, old friend," Soun breathed out deeply. "Plan FTM: C is a go."

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"Nice dojo," Ranma complimented as she stood across from Akane, now in her martial arts gi.

"Thanks… It's nice being in here with someone," Akane sighed. "Dad hasn't taught me for years."

Ranma raised an eyebrow at this and got ready, hands at her side, standing straight.

"Ready?" Akane called out as she got into her fighting stance.

Ranma smirked, nodding her head.

'She thinks she's so good,' Akane thought as she charged forward. 'I bet her back still hurts; she's bluffing.'

Akane punched forward, only to be dodged easily by Ranma, barely moving her head.

Akane followed with another, only to get the same result.

'She's just going to toy with me… well, let's see if she can dodge this!' Akane kicked towards Ranma's chest. Ranma bent over backwards, dodging out of the way, only to spring back up, feet still planted in place.

'Wow, she's flexible. But why won't she hit back? Is she still too hurt?' Akane sped up the pace, only for Ranma to dodge out of the way each time, feet still on the ground.

'That's it! I'm going all out!' Akane did a leg sweep, only for her to jump out of the way, hanging in the air.

Akane continued with an upwards kick, only for the redhead to dodge by spreading her legs.

"You're good, I'll give you that," Akane told Ranma.

"That was nothin'," Ranma replied, smirking.

"Let's see you dodge this!" Akane went as fast as she could, punching left and right, only to be dodged every time.

Akane however was pushing her back, getting the redhead closer to the wall.

"Stay still!" Akane yelled, frustrated with being mocked.

"Yeah right!" Ranma replied, bouncing back towards the wall.

'I have you now,' Akane thought as she put all her strength into her last punch, with Ranma up against the wall.

*Crack* The wood had an Akane-size fist stuck in it.

*Tap tap* Ranma tapped the back of Akane's head, clearly jumping over her punch.

"And… you'd be dead," Ranma smirked.

Both ended up giggillg at that, evolving into full blown laughter.

"Ok, I'm impressed. You are good," Akane admitted, removing her fist from the wall.

"The best," Ranma inserted.

"Right… that's why you're running from your dad," Akane rolled her eyes.

Ranma grumbled at that. "I'm working on it…"

"Still, while I hate to lose, I'm glad that you didn't turn out to be a boy," Akane smiled.

"I know, right?" Ranma replied, happy about the circumstances.

"Yeah. Although, why didn't you hit me?" Akane asked, confused.

Ranma shrugged. "Because I like you."

"… What?" Akane never heard that before, the only one who liked her that didn't try to hit her (that was capable of fighting) was her father… and Doctor Tofu.

Ranma sighed. "You helped me in the bathroom and cared for me. Not many people care about me…"

"Is it that bad?" Akane asked.

"Yes," Ranma turned away. "I don't have many friends."

"I'll be your friend," Akane turned the girl around.

"…Really?" Ranma asked, doubting.

"Yes, how can I not?" Akane offered her hand to the slightly smaller girl. "Friends?"

Ranma glomped Akane. "Friends."

Akane returned the hug, not feeling that awkward because she knew that girls could do such things with each other without being lesbians.

After a minute, however…

"Ranma? You can let go now," Akane said, noticing that the redhead was laying her head between her breasts…

*Cough* "Sorry," Ranma said as she let go, allowing Akane to release the girl.

Akane just put it towards 'bad parenting' in her mind. "Now, come on. Let's take a bath."

Ranma looked a bit uncomfortable.

"Oh, come on, it won't be bad. I promise," Akane tried to reassure Ranma.

"Yeah… I'm just… not really used to it…" She played with her pigtail. "I pretended to be a guy for so long… I can't really let people find out if I want to stay in school."

"Well, that's something a good friend should fix, isn't it?" Akane asked.

Ranma let out her breath. "I'll do it."

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'Akane was in such a rush to get home,' Nabiki thought as she walked into the kitchen. "Hey, sis," Nabiki greeted as she pasted by Kasumi on her way to get a snack.

"Welcome home, Nabiki," Kasumi said, adding, "I need to talk to you soon. It's about Ranma."

Nabiki smirked. "Oh no, Kasumi, you aren't getting your hands on him. You have enough guys after you. Besides, I thought you liked them a bit… older."

Kasumi put a hand to her own mouth. "Oh my! It's not that at all."

"Sure it isn't," Nabiki said as she walked out of the kitchen.

Walking by the table, holding a bag of potato chips, Nabiki saw an envelope on the ground.

'Maybe its money,' Nabiki thought as she opened it.

She didn't find any money, and was about to put it back when she saw that the letter had the name 'Ranma' in the body.

Curious, she read the letter:

_Tendo, my friend, I bring bad news._

_My worthless son has decided to continue to disrespect me by remaining female._

_He has run away, still female. Unfortunately, Plan FTM: B didn't work, due to a miscalculation on my part. The Jusenkyo waters cheated somehow, causing my son, who was unfortunately born into a female body, to fall into the wrong spring… that of a cat._

_If you find a red cat wearing a knapsack, then it is him. To reverse the curse, pour hot water over him. It should be easier to catch him due to me injuring him seriously in our last fight. He jumped into your yard, clearly exhausted. However, I checked the yard around your house and I couldn't find him. Most likely he continued on._

_Oh, why must he be a she?_

_Therefore, to prevent this from happening again, since he's too strong for me to carry back to China, I insist we execute plan FTM: C._

_We shall leave soon. We must get the Spring of Drowned Man water so our children may marry._

_I'll be at a nearby café._

_-Saotome._

Nabiki's eyes widened as she read it over a few more times.

'This can't be. It must be a prank…' Nabiki walked back into the kitchen, letter in hand.

"Kasumi? We need to talk," Nabiki demanded.

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Akane was already nude, coaxing Ranma to get undressed.

"I already saw you naked. Besides, we're both girls," Akane laid out the facts.

"I know; it's just… embarrassing…" Ranma sighed.

"I'll turn around if you want me to," Akane then did just that.

"Thanks…" Ranma whispered as she took off her clothes.

Her shirt and pants came off easily enough, and then her undershirt was off as well.

However, she was mostly embarrassed by the fact that she had boxers on and, well, that was weird.

Shaking it off, she took _them_ off, placing all her clothes into her knapsack, which was on backwards, pressed up against her stomach.

She took it off and undid her breast wraps, placing them in the bottomless bag.

With a sigh of relief that Akane didn't know her secret, she placed her bag down.

"I'm done," she said with a bit more confidence than before.

Akane turned around as they faced each other, nothing in the way.

Ranma studied her new friend, noticing that she shaved everywhere, a smooth-looking athletic body with a bust slightly smaller than her own.

Akane likewise studied Ranma, once again a bit jealous of her in numerous areas. However, she noticed that the girl oddly had no hair on her body, except for the patch between her legs, styled in the form of overlapping Venus symbols.

'How did I not notice that yesterday?' Akane thought.

Ranma smiled and brushed past her new friend. "Come on, Akane. I like the water warm. Nice body."

Akane blushed and shook herself out of her stupor.

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"Let me get this straight… so what you're saying is that Ranma was bleeding to death in the bathroom and Akane snuck her to her room, where you treated her." Nabiki massaged her head. "And the only way to do that was if she was small, therefore assuring that she can turn into a cat. Oh, and that she is a _she_!"

"Yes, I believe that to be the case," Kasumi frowned as she studied the letter. "It appears that Father knew about this as well…"

"Just great, we are in an arranged marriage to a girl who turns into a cat and who was raised as a boy," Nabiki groaned, "and who ran away because he tried to make her a boy and to find her mother…"

Kasumi nodded, displeased at the turn of events.

"Did I leave anything out?" Nabiki grunted.

"Father knew about this and went with it anyway, and it appears that he'll do it again," Kasumi continued to frown. "We must make sure he doesn't find her."

"You can say that again," Nabiki agreed. "Where is she, anyway?"

"She was headed towards the furo with Akane when you walked in," Kasumi answered.

"I'll make sure Daddy is distracted. He should be coming home soon. You tell the girls," Nabiki left, fuming.

"Poor Ranma… don't worry, nothing will happen to you in this house," Kasumi made a promise to herself.

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Akane and Ranma enjoyed themselves in the furo, facing each other.

"You seem more relaxed now," Akane noticed.

"Yeah, I am… I am…" Ranma said, relaxed.

"Do you mind if I ask you something?" Akane asked.

"Not really. I feel that I can trust you," Ranma answered sincerely.

"Thanks," Akane smiled. "Why do you wear a pigtail? It seems like a lot of work when you are out on the road."

Ranma shrugged. "Rebellion, mostly. It allowed me to try to be more like a girl without it blowing my cover."

"Wow, it sounds like you went to school disguised as a boy," Akane laughed at that.

"I did," Ranma answered immediately.

"Really?" Akane was shocked.

"I had to; I went to an all boys' school," Ranma sighed.

"But… how… how did you get away with it?" Akane asked, thinking about all the physical activity and changing in locker rooms.

"I'm just that good," Ranma admitted.

"You changed in a locker room with boys?" Akane proclaimed loudly.

"… Yes… and your point is…?" Ranma arched an eyebrow.

"You're lucky they didn't find out you were a girl," Akane shivered.

"I know. it scared me at times that they would find out, but it wasn't a problem until this last year," Ranma looked down at her breasts.

"Someone found out?" Akane asked, scared.

"Nah, I just… grew…." Ranma was uncomfortable with the subject.

"How would that be… oh," Akane realized what she meant, looking down at her own bust.

"It's harder now, but I manage," Ranma sighed.

"I say you're lucky," Akane tried to cheer her up. "I wish mine were as big as yours."

"Thanks… I guess…" Ranma scratched her head.

A moment passed, then another and another.

"Ranma, how much do you know about being a girl?" Akane asked, wondering.

Ranma turned her head away. "Not much. I never had the chance to try. All I know is what Pops told me about girls and what I looked up in libraries when he wasn't looking."

Ranma chuckled. "I didn't even know I was one until I was ten."

"That must be rough," Akane felt for her friend.

"Not really… I don't care much for a lot of it. Although there are a few things that I wanted to do…" Ranma sighed in disappointment.

They sat quiet for a moment before Akane said, "I'll help you."

"Huh?" Ranma turned towards her dark-blue-haired companion.

"I'll help you be a girl if you help me become better at martial arts," Akane offered.

"I haven't taught anyone before…" She was unsure.

"I don't care, I think you'll make a great sensei," Akane complimented.

"… I'll do it," Ranma agreed. "You can help me be a girl that's still strong and I'll get you to get better. I just don't want to be _too_ girly. If I'm accepting my gender, it'll be on my terms."

"We can do that," Akane smiled. "I'll even show you why it's better to be a girl instead of a boy."

"How so?" Ranma asked skeptically. "Girls are weaker, shorter and have body functions that get in the way of fighting. The only thing that's an advantage is looking good."

Akane shook her head. "I'll show you that it isn't true!"

Ranma laughed. "Right… the only reason I can beat Pops occasionally is that girls are lighter and faster… fragile, but faster…"

Akane was going to say that the world records in speed were held by men, but it was a delusion in her favor, so she didn't.

"Girls are more flexible and dodge easier," Akane tried to think up things fast.

Ranma rolled her eyes, "You can show me later. The water's going to be cold soon." She got out and dried herself.

"I'll think of something!" Akane vowed.

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Nabiki watched her father walk in the house, entering his bedroom (which was next to the dining room since there were no tiny perverts kicking him out to the spare room by the bathroom) to pack for his long journey to China.

"Daddy, did you find Ranma?" Nabiki put on her best worried face.

"No… no, I didn't…" Soun said dejectedly. "Daughter, gather your sisters. I need to tell you something."

"Alright…" Nabiki watched him closely as he packed his bag.

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Ranma was in the outer bath, cleaning herself up.

Akane was there too, hair back in a yellow bow, looking around for Ranma's clothes.

"Where are your spare clothes?" Akane asked, wondering if she had any.

Ranma picked up her knapsack. "Right here," she announced as she pulled a long-sleeved purplish-blue silk shirt out of her bag.

"How do you do that?" Akane asked in surprise.

Ranma smiled. "It's magic."

"I figured **that**!" Akane growled. "But, how?"

Ranma shrugged her shoulders, indicating she had no clue. "Maybe I should ask him when I see him next…"

"Who?" Akane asked suspiciously.

"The maker of this bag. It was a present to me for helping him out with something," Ranma stated. "It's from China."

"Oh," Akane said, ashamed about what she was thinking.

*Knock knock* "Akane, Daddy wants you," Nabiki called from the other side of the door.

Ranma panicked and stuffed her shirt back in her knapsack before putting it on her shoulders and going into the inner bath.

Akane saw this and answered her sister. "Alright, I'm getting dressed."

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"Daughters, I am going away for a while. I don't know how long I'll be gone, but it's something I must do," Soun announced as he sat in front of the three girls at the table.

"Oh my! Father, why must you go?" Kasumi asked, feigning surprise.

"I have to fix something that went wrong… it's a martial artist's duty," Soun answered. "I'll be leaving in the morning with Ranma's father."

Akane growled at the mention of the name.

"Daddy? Where are you going?" Nabiki asked, furious about being deceived.

"To China… you want me to bring you something, don't you?" Soun stared at Nabiki.

"Moi? Why would you think I'd be as demanding as that?" Nabiki bluffed.

Soun sighed. "If you find Ranma, convince him to stay. Just don't mention the engagement yet…"

Behind him, Ranma as a cat snuck up the stairs, knapsack on.

Akane hoped no one noticed.

"Should I prepare the guest room for him?" Kasumi asked.

"Of course," Soun stated obviously. "And enroll him in school with Akane and Nabiki. That way they can keep an eye on him," Soun handed Kasumi some money.

"If you have any extra…" Nabiki smirked.

"No." Soun expected that.

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Ranma was on Akane's bed, curled up on top of her knapsack when Akane came in, causing Ranma's ear to perk up and waking the cat.

"There you are," Akane said, relived. "I have some food here; you must be hungry."

Ranma nodded her head.

*Om Nom NOM!* Ranma ate the food.

"Kasumi is getting a room ready for you to sleep in, and then I can turn you back," Akane stated, feeling… weird talking with a cat.

Ranma shook her head.

"Huh? Why not?" Akane asked.

Ranma just curled up again on Akane's bed.

"You want to sleep here…" Akane figured.

Ranma purred softly.

'She's scared about being alone… I'll be here for you Ranma,' Akane thought as she made herself and Ranma comfortable before drifting off to sleep.

'Mom, I made a friend today… she's hurt… very, very hurt. Please help her find her mom. She misses her as much as I miss you.' Akane's thoughts ended as she drifted to sleep. 'Help… her… cat.'

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**Author's notes:** This is the story that Telinú thought up of to quell me… It looks good so far… Anyway, thanks to tuatara and Kris Leena for helping make this readable. Happy one year anniversary of stories Noy Telinú! Although, as you can tell, Telinú likes cats... and girls... and cats that turn into girls. But most importantly catgirls. So if you want to show appreciation, being a catgirl helps...


	3. II

Ranma-chan, the cat

~Noy Telinú~

**Warning:** fanfiction is illegal. That makes me a sad Text and… wait a second… what's that review? gort420? Anonymous eh? Lets see… Hehah! AhHAHAHA! OH HAH AH HAHAHA! Oh… he haw! Man… that is hilarious… wait… you're serious? *snicker* Brawhahaha! Oh ha haha! HAHAA! *gasps for breath* You don't know Telinú at all, do you? Or Noy for that matter. Or even read the warnings did you? Yep… Or Noy's profile… uh huh… niccee.

**Caution:** due to a review that wasn't signed, I, the Text ended up distracting Noy with it and… well… everything was delayed since we were all laughing so hard. Yeah… sorry bout that. To keep this from happening again, please pay attention to these and to the profile. Since what gort420 said will NOT be happening EVER in any Noy Telinú fanfiction EVER.

You have been warned…

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_**II**_: Off the rails. And the walls. And the sidewalks as well…

Akane awoke in the morning as usual, wondering slightly if what happened yesterday was just a dream.

Then she saw Ranma sleeping as a cat on her bed and she knew it was real.

"Nya!" Ranma awoke and greeted the hand on her back with annoyance.

"Once Dad is gone you can change back to normal." Akane got out of bed and stretched. "And you… huh? Are you asleep again?"

Ranma purred in her sleep, curled up on her bag.

"Fine, be like that. I'm going out for a jog," Akane told her cat friend.

"Nya…"

"Akane, say goodbye to Father…" Kasumi spoke as she opened Akane's door. "Don't worry, Ranma, you will be safe shortly…"

"I still have a hard time believing Dad would do this…" Akane felt nauseous.

"Are you alright, Akane?" Kasumi asked.

"Yeah… fine… fine…" Akane waved her away.

"Are you sure?" Kasumi looked Akane over. "If you say so…"

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"Daughters…" Soun adjusted his bag. "I have to do this… for the sake of the schools. Now, take good care of each other… I… I'm missing you already!"

Nabiki grumbled and rubbed her eye as her father's waterworks started. "Daddy… it's too early…"

"Good luck, Father!" Kasumi smiled.

"Bye, Dad…" Akane tried to keep her cool.

With a cry, Soun Tendo left, unknowingly helping a cat…

"Nyrall?" Ranma came down the stairs, knapsack on.

"Come on, Ranma, I'll get you human again…" Akane walked to the bathroom with Ranma.

"Living on our own…" Nabiki yawned. "Tired…"

"Time to make breakfast…" Kasumi smiled and left for the kitchen.

Nabiki moaned and sat on the sofa, falling asleep instantly.

Soon after, Ranma and Akane came into the room.

"Thank you for your hospitality." Ranma bowed, her breasts bound and clothes loose. "But I'm afraid I can't stay… I must find my Mom…"

"But wait! You, you promised to help me!" Akane was shocked.

"I know…" Ranma sighed. "But I don't want to intrude and… I'll just get in the way…"

"Zzz…" Nabiki slept.

"Oh, you're not intruding." Kasumi smiled. "It's nice to have someone around…"

"I don't know…" Ranma started to leave.

"You can stay here!" Akane grabbed Ranma's arm. "We can help find your Mom. Just… please stay… we have food!"

Conflict washed over Ranma's face. "I… um… oh, alright…"

Ranma sat down at the table.

"I'm going out on my jog now." Akane couldn't help but smile.

"ZZzZz…" Nabiki slept.

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"Kasumi… need any help?" Ranma tugged at her pigtail. "I don't want to be a freeloader…"

"Oh, no need to worry about that, Ranma," Kasumi dismissed Ranma's worry while she cooked. "You are our guest…"

"I know…" Ranma sighed. "But… I just… *sigh*. Pops wrecked so many people's lives. I… I want to be a better person and… well…"

Kasumi placed a hand on Ranma's shoulder. "But you are better than your father; you decided to stay and help Akane. You are doing that, right?"

"Yeah… I am…" Ranma played with her pigtail. "I'm sorry, it's just… I'm afraid of what will happen when Pops shows up…"

"We will deal with that when we come to it," Kasumi reassured Ranma. "Now, if you really want to help, wake up Nabiki. Breakfast is almost ready."

"Um… okay…"

Ranma walked up to Nabiki and stared at her sleeping form.

"ZZZ…" she snoozed.

"Nabiki wake up…"

"ZZzzZ…"

"Nabiki… Wake UP!" Ranma said it louder.

"zzZzZ…"

"WAKE UP!" Ranma yelled.

"ZzzZz…" Nabiki didn't budge.

"Ranma, have her smell money," Kasumi advised from the kitchen.

"Um…" Ranma found a 1,000 yen note on the floor and put it under Nabiki's nose.

"Zzz *pop* Money…" Nabiki snatched it and rubbed it against her face, still asleep.

"Um… Nabiki…"

"My money!" Nabiki yelled in her sleep.

"Nabiki…"

"Mine!" Nabiki snuggled with the money.

Ranma sighed and started pulling the note.

"NO! MINE! MINE! Akane! Beat up this person! My money…" Nabiki's eyes started opening slowly.

"Breakfast is ready!" Kasumi smiled.

"Once Akane is through with you-u-u…" Nabiki was mostly out of it. "I'll charge you double…"

"Oh my… Ranma, it has to be over 9,000 to work." Kasumi got out a 10,000 note. "Nabiki… money…"

*Sniff, sniff* Her eyes shot open. "Is that a 10,000?"

"Breakfast is ready." Kasumi smiled. "Please let go of that 1,000 yen note."

Nabiki blinked. "Huh?"

She noticed what she was doing and let go.

"Thanks…" Ranma muttered.

"Wait… is that mine?" Nabiki smirked.

"Look, breakfast!" Ranma tried to distract Nabiki.

*Step, step, step* "I'm home!" Akane called out.

"Good! Breakfast!" Ranma hurryingly sat down away from Nabiki.

"… What's her problem?" Akane asked.

"She had to wake up Nabiki." Kasumi smiled.

"Ooh…" Akane nodded in understanding.

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"Kasumi… I'll be in the Dojo…" Ranma announced after seeing Akane and Nabiki go off to school.

Kasumi smiled. "Ranma, please, if you are going to look for your mother, just say so…"

"… Alright…" Ranma nodded and left for the Dojo.

"Such a sweet girl…" Kasumi said to herself.

Ranma stretched in the dojo, loosening her muscles.

Being a martial artist of very few peers, Ranma had to practice by herself since she ran away from her father.

'One… two… three…' She hung from the ceiling rafters and touched her toes. 'Four… five… six…'

No one else was in her league… well, that she'd seen in a while…

A sigh escaped her lips as she mechanically kept doing upside-down pull-ups.

'Forty-seven… forty-eight… forty-nine…'

Still, the price of freedom was one that she had to pay. No matter how steep, it was worth it to her.

'Seventy… seventy-one… seventy-two…' Ranma continued, not strained at all.

The only thing on Ranma's mind was finding her mom. After that, she didn't really know what to do.

'Ninety-three… ninety-four… ninety-five…'

All her life she just had to do what her father told her. Sure, she rebelled subtly and even physically a few times, but she was just biding her time, really. Making her own decisions, living her own life, that is what she always wanted ever since she figured out that she was always… a she.

'1-1-6… and 1-1-7.' Ranma fell to the ground, landing on her feet.

Now that she had it… it was a little overwhelming. Not that she regretted it, not at all… but still… it was a lot harder than she thought.

'One, two, three…' Ranma punched the air. 'One, two, three…'

She spun and kicked.

'One… two… three…'

It was this mindless exercise that created a calm in Ranma's mind. This is where she thrived, what she lived for…

'One, two. One, two…'

She jumped and landed in a crouch.

*Munch* Kasumi ate popcorn as she watched Ranma, causing the redhead to turn around.

"That was good!" Kasumi smiled and ate more popcorn.

"Um… thanks?'" Ranma raised her eyebrow. "Why are you here anyway? I mean… why are you watching me?"

"I was bored. I finished cleaning the house and with Father gone, it's lonely here," Kasumi sighed. "I don't even have to make lunch for another hour…"

"Wait… what time is it?" Ranma wiped her forehead of sweat.

"It's 10:19 right now." Kasumi smiled. "You've been out here for over two hours already…"

"Really? I didn't notice," Ranma sighed. "Am I really that entertaining?"

"Oh yes, that was wonderful!"

Ranma smiled at that.

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Miles away, Soun and Genma were buying time.

[Tree] Genma's sign states.

"Good one… now it's your turn…"

"Greaolf arlff alf ggrowl…. Growawwool."

"Hmmm… what could that be… hmmm…" Soun looked around. "A rock… a giant rock!"

"Growlll…" Genma nodded.

"My turn… I spy with my little eye… something that has green…"

[Tree]

"Darn it, you got it again Saotome…" Soun snapped his fingers.

"Growll forlf gggrrroowaaas grow ga growllls…"

"Ummm… errr…. The path?" Soun guessed.

Genma shook his head.

"A pinecone?"

[No…]

"The packs?"

"Guff…"

"A branch!"

Genma nodded

*Wham* Said branch met Soun's head.

"AHHawwow!" Soun rubbed his forehead. "My turn… I spy…"

[Tree…]

"How did you know?" Soun whined. "How much longer to China?"

[Long….]

"I know that, it's just… I'm leaving my girls behind and all alone…" Soun cried.

[Ranma will protect them.]

"But she's not there…. And is a she…"

**[HE! I WILL NEVER ACCEPT THAT MY SON IS A GIRL!]**

"If that were the case, then we wouldn't have this problem of going to Jusenkyo in the first place!" Soun yelled.

"Greolf off grawlf…"

"Take that back!" Soun warned.

[Never…] Genma ran forward.

"Come back here, Saotome!" Soun followed.

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"What is it like being cat?" Kasumi wondered as she drank tea with Ranma.

"It…. Err… I never had to answer that before," Ranma admitted. "It's…. better than at first… but due to… something, I can't do too much as a cat…"

"Oh?" Kasumi raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean?"

"It's just… I can only concentrate on four things as a cat. My mind… isn't as advanced… yeah…" Ranma tried to explain. 'Stupid Pops… Nekoken messing with my mind… at least the Amazons helped with _that_…'

"Ooh…" Kasumi ate a cracker.

"It can be a pain, but it can also be a break from a lot of my worries," Ranma noted.

Kasumi tilted her head. "Do you feel like doing kitty things when you are a kitty?"

"Um… what?" Ranma blinked.

"Like climbing trees or being cute…." Kasumi smiled.

"No… not really…" Ranma stated.

"How about petting? Do you like being petted as a cat?" Kasumi tilted her head the other way.

"Now you're scaring me…" Ranma admitted.

"Oh, I'm sorry, it's … I'm so excited… things have been… boring lately," Kasumi sighed.

"I haven't tried it… Been on my own for a while…" Ranma rubbed her chin.

Kasumi smiled. "May I be the first to pet you? Please…. I am gentle… Nice to kitties…"

Ranma's eyebrows rose. "Maybe when I get splashed again…"

"Thank you! Thank you!" Kasumi hugged the girl. "Oh my… I shouldn't have done that…"

"No, no… it was… nice…" Ranma controlled her blush. "I'm… going to exercise more…"

"Oh, OK…" Kasumi smiled.

'That was weird,' Ranma thought to herself as she shook her head to clear her thoughts.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

"I'm home!" Akane called out as she came inside the gates.

"Hello, Akane." Kasumi smiled as she welcomed her home. "Ranma is in the dojo and I'm going out to get some groceries. Nabiki is doing that thing again?"

Akane nodded. "Bye, Kasumi!"

And with that, the blue-haired girl ran inside.

"Such spirit…" Kasumi smiled and left for the market.

Akane stopped in her tracks when she came into the dojo, seeing Ranma standing on her head and hands meditating.

Not that the redhead seemed to mind. "Hey, Akane."

"Hi… Ranma, how long were you in here?" Akane asked, curious.

"Um… when was lunch?" Ranma laughed nervously.

"Well, I don't know about you, but Kasumi likes eating lunch at 12:12…" Akane's eyes widened. "You were on your head the whole time?"

"No, of course not." Ranma fell back and onto her feet. "I did other stuff as well…"

"Uh huh… Now that I'm home… I'm wondering if you could… teach me martial arts…. Please?" Akane begged.

"Well, I might have time…" Ranma thought it over.

"What do you mean 'MIGHT'? You haven't done anything all day!" Akane yelled.

"And YOU have?" Ranma raised an eyebrow. "Don't you have homework and school stuff?"

"Yes, but…" Akane shook her head. "That's not the point, I can do it later."

"Well, I was training all day, so…" Ranma put her hands behind her head.

Akane growled. "What do you want me to do?"

"I'd like to relax a bit, do some girl thing, I don't know. Something like that…" Ranma admitted. "After running so much, doing something that's relaxing would be nice… I wasn't able to do stuff like that growing up."

Akane sighed, kicking herself for being selfish. "I'll take you somewhere where you can relax tonight, but… please? I haven't had a real instructor in years."

"Well, I'm not one either." Ranma turned to face Akane.

"It's good enough," Akane dismissed.

Ranma let out her breath and clasped her hands behind her back. "Well, what will you be wearing?"

"Huh?"

"I can do it in a school uniform, I mean it is cute and fetishy and all…" Ranm smiled.

The sound of the comment flying over Akane's head was as loud as a jet engine. "Huh? I have my gi…"

"Eh, good enough." Ranma rocked back and forth. "You look good in that uniform though…"

"Thanks…" Akane smiled and ran to her room.

"Gosh she's pretty." Ranma smirked. 'Nice smile.'

Ranma resumed head meditating, trying to use only her head this time.

She succeeded.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

"Exquisite!" Kuno exclaimed as he examined photos of Akane that Nabiki displayed before him. "Like a fierce tigress…"

"Yes, my sister is hot," Nabiki droned. "Now, have you heard of someone named Nodoka Saotome?"

"Hmm… I can't say that I have," Kuno declared. "Why do you seek this woman?"

"Oh, it's nothing important… just personal, that's all…" Nabiki ate her banana seductively. "Just very important for Akane's health…"

"The health of Akane Tendo?" Kuno stood. "Than I shall find her at once!"

"Yes, do that…" Nabiki smirked. 'Well, I did a good deed today. Now to negate this goody-goody feeling… it's nauseating.'

"… For there shall be no rest in the search-" Kuno was cut off.

"So… the photos…" Nabiki brought his attention back.

"Ah yes, how much for these amazing shots?" Kuno asked.

"350," Nabiki answered. "Tree fiddy."

"Ah, for that much…"

"Thousand."

"What?"

Nabiki moved in closer. "350,000 yen for all 35."

"That's preposterous!" Kuno exclaimed. "There is no way I'll pay that much!"

"I'll throw in this one…" Nabiki showed Kuno a bikini shot, "if you find Nodoka Saotome by the end of the month and send her to our dojo."

"IT'S A DEAL!" Kuno agreed very fast.

'What a sucker…" Nabiki bit off the last of her banana.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

"That didn't take long…" Ranma commented as she stood up after seeing Akane come in.

Akane shrugged. "Let's get started."

"Alright…. You look good…" Ranma said offhandedly, hands behind her back, looking away randomly.

"Thanks…" Akane got into a fighting stance. "What do I do first?"

Ranma raised an eyebrow upon seeing Akane's stance. "Well, first you relax. You've been way too eager and high strung."

Akane nodded reluctantly and took a deep breath.

"… I said to relax…" Ranma tilted her head slightly in confusion.

Akane growled. "I AM relaxed!"

"No, you're not," Ranma answered truthfully. "I said relax. That's not relaxed."

Akane took a few deep breaths and tried again.

"No, no, no… I said relax… re-lax… you look like you want to kill someone," Ranma noted.

"Well, I DO, but… I'm trying!" Akane yelled.

"This is getting nowhere. Re-lax. Relax… take a deep breath…." Ranma demonstrated, using her arms to emphasize.

Akane copied her.

Ranma smiled. "Now, again…. Breathe in…. and breathe out…"

Akane copied, feeling a bit better.

"Good… breathe in… and out… close your eyes… breathe in… and out…" Ranma demonstrated slowly.

Akane followed, finally starting to relax.

Ranma moved behind her. "Breathe in… and out…"

Akane felt better already.

Ranma started massaging her pupil's shoulders. "Breathe in… and out…"

Akane was startled, but it felt good so she relaxed more.

'Wow, she was tense…' Ranma thought. "Breathe in… and out…"

Akane continued to breathe slowly, getting more relaxed.

Ranma moved down her back. "Breathe in… and out…"

Akane started to feel her muscles loosening; a smile coming to her face.

"Good… relax…. Breathe in… and out…"

Akane breathed slower, relaxing.

Ranma was now massaging Akane's arms. "Breathe in… and out…"

The blue-haired girl felt more relaxed than ever before.

"Breathe in… and… out…" Ranma said slowly.

Akane found it that she was breathing slower.

Ranma moved down to her thighs. "Breathe… in… and… out…"

Akane was starting to feel like jello… it was nice.

Ranma moved down to the calves. "Breathe in… and out…"

Akane was on auto pilot now.

Ranma stood up and faced Akane. "Breathe in… and out… now, open your eyes…"

She did as she was told.

"Now, how did that feel?" Ranma smirked.

"Great…" Akane said slowly. "Sensei… I think I'm relaxed now…"

"I think you are too. Now that you're at peace… let's get started on the physical aspect of this…" Ranma smirked.

Akane just nodded.

"First… do… this…" Ranma showed Akane a move.

Akane copied.

"Good… did you feel the energy flowing through you?"

"Yes... I did… it felt nice…" Akane answered. "Smooth… not powerful… weird…"

"It's calm and relaxing, isn't it?" Ranma noted. "I figured that we'd start with this. It feels good and helps you find your center. Much easier to do when relaxed instead of mad."

Akane nodded.

"Now, defend as best you can," Ranma instructed.

Akane nodded.

Ranma attacked, slowly and simply.

Akane dodged and blocked easily.

"Good… good… now a bit harder," Ranma warned.

Ranma did a leg sweep that Akane jumped over it.

Smirking, she then followed with a leg kick… that Akane bent over in mid-air, landing in a roll.

"Wow…" Akane was shocked on her flexibility.

"Good… good… now dodge this…" Ranma punched left and right, causing Akane to weave and bob.

Ranma smirked and pressed her attack, causing Akane to go backwards.

She pressed and pressed until Akane was against a wall.

That's when Akane attacked and punched at Ranma as hard as she could.

Ranma dodged and hit Akane in the back, causing her to fall to the ground.

"Good… good… that was much better than last time…" Ranma helped her friend up. "It was… unexpected."

"Yeah… I felt… so… so…"

"Fluid?"

"Something like that," Akane let out her breath. "Thanks."

"Don't mention it." Ranma smiled. "You asked me to help and I did. You were much more focused after you relaxed. It was the least I could do."

"No, no… that was the most anyone has done for me in years…"

"What about breakfast?" Ranma's eyes grew wide and hid most of her face behind her fists.

Akane laughed at that. "Yes… breakfast was good."

"I thought so." Ranma smirked. "You've just been too mad, too serious. Relax, smell the roses. Slow down once in a while and you'll find yourself speeding up."

"… Wow…" Akane was in awe.

'I know, and I just made that up right now,' Ranma thought. "Now, Akane…"

Ranma looked up to her pupil.

"What?"

'Damn, I'm short…' Ranma sighed. "Now you have to do your fulfill of the bargain."

"What? But it's only…" Akane looked outside.

"Night… Now let's clean up and go."

Akane giggled at Ranma's fake sternness. "Yes, sensei."

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

"I'm a little nervous about this, Akane…" Ranma gulped as she stood dressed next to her blue-haired companion.

"But you look good!" Akane had to hide her envy.

"Oh, I know that!" Ranma expressed. "That's the problem!"

Ranma was in a red Chinese dress that she had in her bag. Said bag was on her back.

"How is **that** a problem?" Akane shouted. "Many girls would kill to look like you!"

"I've NEVER had to deal with looking like this!" Ranma threw her arms in the air. "Like my Pops would allow me to wear a dress!"

"But you look AmAzing!" Akane stressed.

"I'm scared, alright!" Ranma snapped. "I never had to deal with boys looking at me like that!"

Akane took a deep breath and rubbed her forehead. "Sorry about that… but you make me jealous…"

"I… thanks, I guess… I'm scared…" Ranma crossed her arms over her chest. 'It's easier to look at girls that to be looked at by boys… I don't even like boys… except one… but…'

A tear rolled down her cheek.

"Ranma?" Akane grew concerned. "Are you alright?"

Ranma wiped the tear away. "I'm fine… fine…Just… thinking of my first crush… that's all…"

"Oh…" Akane knew a thing or two about that.

"It was ten years ago… That was a strange time… I thought I was a boy, and he was a boy, so… when Pops said stuff later about sexuality I thought I was gay. Until I found out that I was a girl." Ranma smiled. "Boy, was that weird…"

"Maybe this isn't a good idea…" Akane suggested.

"No, I'm going. I just had a moment…" Ranma took a deep breath. "I think I can go now…"

Akane looked at Ranma with a bit of sadness before getting ready herself.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

"Akane… thanks for doing this…" Ranma said truthfully as she and Akane walked to the ice cream shop.

"It's no problem at all…" Akane smiled. "Ice cream makes anyone feel better."

"I never had ice cream before…" Ranma sighed sadly. "Pops said it's unmanly…"

Akane giggled. "Well, you don't _look_ like a man, do you?"

"Nope!" Ranma smiled. "… Akane… I don't know what it is about you… but… somehow… when I'm around you… I end up telling you things I haven't told anyone…"

Akane looked intrigued.

"I normally keep things to myself… all secretive… but… somehow… with you… I can talk about myself…" Ranma sighed. "Maybe it's because you helped me while I was injured, maybe it's because you're friendly… You're the first female friend I've had since… actually… you're my only female Japanese friend… Odd… Thanks…"

"You're welcome…" Akane puzzled. "Ranma? Am I really your only friend? What about Kasumi?"

"Maybe someday… but… she's… I don't know…" Ranma sighed. "There was this one girl… Tall, great cook…. We… had a problem… I don't think we left under good conditions…"

"So… she's not your friend anymore?" Akane asked.

"I doubt it… She was really pissed the last time I saw her…" Ranma mentally added, 'Because she found out I was a girl…'

"That's sad…"

"Yeah… I made some international friends… Not many… but… they were nice… It's a benefit of fighting 'round the world." Ranma smiled. "Blondes are fun to be around…"

"I guess they are…" It went over Akane's head again. "I don't know any blondes…"

"Is this the place?" Ranma pointed to a building.

"Yes, it is. Come on." Akane dragged Ranma inside.

'Okay… you can do this… you can do this…' Ranma repeated inside her head.

"Two chocolate parfaits, please," Akane requested.

"Alright." The teenage boy gave them to her.

"Thank you." Akane led Ranma to a table.

"Thanks, Akane…" Ranma said in a tiny voice.

"You're welcome… Now… eat…"

Ranma brought a spoonful to her mouth slowly.

'I can do it, I can do it…' she repeated the phrase in her head.

Akane giggled and ate her ice cream.

"Ahhh…." Ranma brought it closer.

*Gulp….* Ranma ate the ice cream slowly.

Her eyes went wide.

"Ranma?" Akane grew worried.

Ranma started shaking and a smile grew to humongous proportions across her face.

"MwAHAHAHA!" Ranma shouted with glee and started eating it fast.

*OMm NoM nom Nom NOM* Ranma ate the ice cream.

Akane laughed at the display. "Glad you like it."

Soon, however, Ranma's was empty. "Nom?"

She licked the inside clean and panicked.

"Wow… that was eaten fast…" Akane commented.

"Nom? NOM!" Ranma's mind was cracked. "Onm! Om! NOM!"

Her arms started flailing hilariously, so fast that they were balls and sticks on a body that looked much smaller than before.

"Um… Ranma?" Akane started getting embarrassed.

"More! More-more-moremoremore!" Ranma shouted, eye twitching. "Must… have… more!"

Akane sweatdropped as Ranma started laughing.

"Hee-haha! More-more-more!" Ranma zipped by her friend to the counter. "More, pwease!"

Ranma stuck out her tongue with her head tilted sideways and her eyes closed.

"Pweaseee?" Ranma's face was weird in a cute way.

The teenager caved and gave Ranma more ice cream for free.

"HeehahahA!" Ranma laughed. "Ice-creamicecreamicecream!"

"… Ranma?"

"Icecreamicecreamicecream!" Ranma laughed and ate madly.

"I think that's enough…" Akane dragged Ranma away when she finished it again.

"Icecreamicecreamicecream!" Ranma laughed madly.

"Ranma!" Akane tried shaking the redhead when they were out of the store. "Snap out of it!"

"Ice cream? Yes, I like ice cream! HaHa!" Ranma was cross-eyed.

*Splash* Being Tokyo, it rained for five seconds, causing Akane to hold a red cat instead.

"Nyra?" Ranma shook her head to get it straight.

"Feeling better now?" Akane asked.

Ranma nodded.

"Good… Now let's get you some hot water…"

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

"Sorry about that… I don't know what came over me…" Ranma blushed as she and Akane walked down the street.

"I don't know either… Maybe a rush from having never eaten ice cream before?" Akane shook her head.

"Maybe… I… Oh, look, a magic store!" Ranma dragged Akane inside.

"Magic store? Ranma you can't tell me you believe…" Akane stopped what she was saying and shook her head. 'Look who I'm talking to…'

'I hope there's some good stuff in here, not like the things Ryoga got…' Ranma smirked. 'That guy will never beat me…'

"Ranma… is this stuff real?" Akane was curious.

"Probably…" Ranma looked around.

"Why, yes, it is real!" A man came out from behind the counter. "Everything in here is real!"

"Well, that's good…" Ranma nodded, hands on her hips. "Anything good?"

"I don't think this is real… It's just a comb!" Akane had a blue comb in her hand that she found on a shelf. "How can a comb be magic?"

The man chuckled. "Like this…" He took it from her and combed his own hair, turning it blue.

"Wow..." Ranma was impressed. "Hair color combs… How good are they?"

"Permanent," the man answered. "Don't worry, we have many shades and colors to restore your own hair color…"

Akane's jaw was dropped and she had to pick it up while the man showed Ranma the various colors of combs.

"So… this is my color red…" Ranma confirmed.

The man nodded. "Sharpie red."

"Hmm… How much?" Ranma stroked her chin.

"1,000 yen each," he answered.

"I'll take five," Ranma answered back.

"Alright…" He rang her up. "They are unlimited use, so no worries. One pass through changes all the hair on your body… nice for disguises."

Ranma nodded in agreement.

Akane blinked when she was dragged out of the store, jaw re-hinged.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

"… And now my hair is blue…" Ranma explained. "A lighter color than yours, but still blue… Hey… We can pretend to be cousins!"

"I don't know, that sounds stupid… Who bases relationships on hair colors?" Akane wondered.

"Um… everyone?" Ranma used the black comb she bought. "Girls are supposed to have weird hair colors. It makes them stand out."

"That doesn't make any sense…" Akane shook her head.

"Of course it does… Ever seen a boy with green hair? It looks weird. Like he's a clown or something… But with a girl, it's odd and interesting… you get it?" Ranma tried to explain.

"No…"

"Take you, for example… Blue hair: it makes you stand out from your sisters, who have brown hair. It's a sign of strength or something… Your mom had blue hair, didn't she?" Ranma asked.

"Yes… Yes, she did…" Akane said slowly, sadly.

"Exactly… There's a 33% chance of girls getting their mother's hair color… I think… Did you know that I was born with black hair?" Ranma asked.

"Yeah, I noticed that in the photo…" Akane scrunched her eyebrows.

"Yep… Apparently, I was supposed to be a boy… But that's Pops being Pops… I ended up being given a drink that's supposed to give you the hair color that you were supposed to have. It was tasty… Weird pink cloud…" Ranma laughed. "It only works for girls. Makes them exotic and sexy."

"Why doesn't it work on boys?" Akane asked.

"People make fun of them… I think… Besides, it's much more feminine to have weird hair colors. I don't know any boy with weird hair… Then again, I only knew a few personally…" Ranma explained. "Of course, Europeans have natural blonde and red hair, so I guess it's just different here in Asia."

"You need to get to know more people," Akane suggested. "It sounds like you don't have many friends…"

"Well, I told you that… but… how am I going to get more friends? I'm still too uneasy to do that type of thing."

"Well… how about school? You need to continue your education and Dad did say to send you there when we meet you," Akane offered.

"I don't know… I hate school uniforms…" Ranma thought, '… On me… They are nice enough on the girls… but… not for me…'

"Well, I guess I can't force you…."

"Hmm… I got an idea…" Ranma grinned.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

"Saotome… I didn't know you had a son… Why did you leave HIM BEHIND?" Soun grew furious. "He's at least a BOY!"

Genma growled and got up from the ground. "It's not what it looks like…"

"Yes, we just so happened to pass by a town that just so happened to have someone looking for you… And just so happened to have a poster about Nodoka…" Soun's eyebrow twitched.

"That BOY is a GIRL!" Genma stressed. "I got her father to think Ranma was a boy and engaged them. They can't marry anyway since they are both girls… I hate that… but I got a free lunch out of it."

"Saotome… you realize that by fixing our problem, you can legitimize her engagement?" Soun sweatdropped.

"Hee-hee-hee-heh heh… Um… Tendo… that… um… I have a plan to get out of that…. What's that over there?" Genma pointed behind Soun.

"Where?" Soun turned around.

Genma ran for his life.

"Saotome!"

A few hundred feet away, a wandering boy heard the cry.

"Saotome? Ranma! There you are! I'll make you pay for what you did!" Ryoga then went in the completely opposite direction.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

"That's your plan?" Nabiki rubbed her forehead. "That has got to be the stupidest thing I've ever heard…"

"Aw, come on…" Ranma sighed.

"I think it's a wonderful idea!" Kasumi smiled.

"Honestly… Coming in as a cat watching from the trees would be really silly, Ranma," Akane sighed.

"It was worth a shot…" Ranma mumbled.

Nabiki stood up and stretched her arms. "Leave the planning to the professionals."

"Sis… What's YOUR plan, then?" Akane questioned.

"Well, it depends… I think we should just wait until Ranma's mom comes… and then go from there," Nabiki answered, cleaning her nails.

"Yeah, right, like my Mom would just walk in through the front door!" Ranma threw her arms in the air.

"That's the plan…" Nabiki replied.

"Oh, how exciting!" Kasumi clasped her hands together.

"Uh huh… right…" Ranma sighed. "And why would my mom come in through the front door?"

"Because Kuno." Nabiki smirked.

"Who?" Ranma was cut off by Akane.

"WHAT? WHY WOULD… I… I DON'T EVEN…" Akane screeched.

Nabiki counted on her fingers. "He's rich… powerful… easy to manipulate… and has these posters out already."

Nabiki pulled one out.

**Nodoka Saotome**

**Please come to the Tendo Dojo in Nerima, Tokyo.**

**A beautiful madien's life is at stake!**

**10,000 yen reward for her whereabouts.**

**Contact Tateawaki Kuno….**

The rest was ripped off.

"He got these out so fast…" Nabiki explained, "that they're all over Japan already."

"…" Ranma was in shock.

But not Kasumi. "How nice of you, Nabiki…"

"Nabiki…" Akane asked slowly. "What did you give him to do this?"

Nabiki held a straight face. "Nothing."

"Nothing?" Akane didn't believe her.

"I just mentioned that your life was on the line… No bigge." Nabiki shrugged.

Akane's head hit the table.

"Oh my… This complete one has Ranma's mother's face on it!" Kasumi smiled.

"Give me that!" Ranma took the paper out of her hands. "How? Where?"

Nabiki smirked. "A little bit of research. Found out that the Saotomes lived in the area. Of course… Kuno-baby got a lot more info in his search…"

Ranma gulped. "Mom…"

"Pretty good looking too…" Nabiki commented. "It's clear where you get your looks from."

Ranma arched an eyebrow.

"Depends… Are you rich?" Nabiki smirked.

"I don't think so…" Ranma muttered.

"Than you're not my type," Nabiki answered.

Akane lifted her head from the table. "I'm taking a bath…"

Ranma perked up. "May I join you?"

Akane was out of it. "Sure… whatever…"

Ranma smiled.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

"Did you really mean that, Nabiki?" Kasumi asked.

"Mean what?" Nabiki stretched.

"That you don't care about sex, only money?" Kasumi looked worried.

"Well, not the **only** thing…" Nabiki shrugged. "Male, Female… I don't care, really… I'm like that…"

"Oh my…" Kasumi put a hand to her mouth.

"It's not a bad thing…" Nabiki rolled her eyes. "I'm just opportunistic. Now… Ranma, on the other hand…."

"Oh my!" Kasumi was shocked.

"She's most likely a lesbian. She could be bi… but I think she's lesbian…."

"How can you be sure?" Kasumi asked.

"Did you see how her eyes lit up when she asked to join Akane in the bath?" Nabiki smirked. "Yep… Likes girls… a lot…"

"Oh my… poor Ranma…" Kasumi sighed.

"Kasumi… it's not immaturity…" Nabiki moaned.

"I know that… It's just… I don't think Akane is like that…"

"I don't know… Sis confuses the hell out of me. She might as well be asexual with the way she responds to things," Nabiki put in.

"I'm afraid she hates boys…" Kasumi bit her lip.

"Yet she doesn't go crazy over girls either… I think she hasn't been aroused… ever…" Nabiki shook her head.

"Do kitties get aroused?" Kasumi asked, looking at the ceiling, hand to her lip.

Nabiki facefaulted.

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"I like taking baths together…" Ranma sighed in contempt as she relaxed in the bath with Akane.

"Me too…" Akane agreed. "I'm glad that you're a girl."

"So am I…" Ranma smiled. "Who is that Kuno guy, anyway?"

"Oh… him…" Akane growled.

"Huh?" Ranma blinked.

"Kuno… He's the richest idiot in the area… He… he likes me for some reason." Akane explained.

"Oh…" Ranma nodded.

"All I ever did was sign up for the kendo club… and he asked to date me!" Akane rubbed her forehead. "He was impressed by my tryouts… I told him no… and then he figures that I want to be beaten to date someone! Honestly! Who does that?"

"Yeah…" Ranma thought of a tribe in China. "Who…"

"Exactly… Now nearly all the boys who play sports attack me every morning, trying to defeat me in battle!" Akane growled.

"This Kuno…" Ranma bit her lip. "Does he like… ANY strong girl?"

Akane blinked. "Maybe… He's the schools biggest pervert… It's possible…"

"Well… if I get someone else to make him not think of you…" Ranma trailed off.

Akane's eyes widened. "YOU?"

"Of course not!" Ranma yelled. "Someone else… I'm thinking of…"

"Good luck finding someone…" Akane mused.

"Yeah… Well, I'm getting out," Ranma announced.

"Me too… I'm starting to wrinkle."

Ranma laughed at that.

"What's so funny?" Akane asked.

"Nothing… nothing… I wonder what blue hair will look like…" Ranma pulled out the comb.

"You know what you look like." Akane rolled her eyes.

"Not up here!" Ranma sighed. "Down here… with my Venuses."

"You named that?" Akane blinked.

"Well, yeah. All that effort to make it permanent… I had to be very careful with the hair removal… And now it's blue!" Ranma smiled.

Akane's eyes widened. "So it is…"

Ranma got dressed. "I love these combs…"

Akane got dressed as well. "What's the big deal? It's just hair changing color."

"Yeah, but we look alike!" Ranma smiled.

"What?" Akane looked Ranma over. "Not really…"

"Yes, we do…"

"No, we don't!" Akane yelled.

"Oh, come on… admit it!" Ranma groaned. "I look like you when I have blue hair!"

"No… you… don't!" Akane shouted.

"Seriously, we could be cousins! Just look at us!" Ranma pulled Akane to the mirror.

"I don't see it…" Akane shook her head.

"I don't care… Next time we go out, the Tendo cousins will be doing… stuff…" Ranma trailed off.

"What? Why?" Akane asked, irritated.

"I'd feel better if I pretended to be someone else…" Ranma explained. "Hmmm… what's a good name?"

"Oh, just be Ranko and live with it!" Akane threw her arms into the air.

"Ranko?" Ranma tilted her head.

"Wild child… that's you, alright," Akane growled.

"Hmm… Ranko Tendo… nice ring to it." Ranma rubbed her chin.

"Are you going to go to school like that?" Akane smirked.

"Hell no… I'm not going to go to school as a girl." Ranma crossed her arms.

"What?"

"If I'm going to school, I'll be pretending to be a boy… I do NOT need boys staring at me…" Ranma shivered.

"Oh, and how are you going to deal with gym?" Akane asked.

"I'll think of something… Not that it'll matter for a while… Good night, Akane… I'm sleeping with your sister!" Ranma smirked.

"That's nice… Who?" Akane raised an eyebrow.

Ranma sighed. "Kasumi… she wants to pet me."

Akane giggled.

"My first time… I hope she's nice…" Ranma waited for a reply.

None came.

'Oh well…' Ranma left the bathroom.

The blue-haired pigtailed girl became a redhead again after combing her hair with her red comb.

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"Saotome… Who would have wanted to send your wife to my dojo?" Soun asked.

"How am I supposed to know?" Genma replied. "I don't even know who this Kuno guy is!"

"He sounds familiar…" Soun thought deep.

"Well, whoever he is, he's going to send all of the people who hate the Saotomes there too…" Genma sighed.

"Hate? What did you do this time?" Soun whined.

"You steal a little here and there to get by and suddenly everyone hates you…" Genma sighed.

"Just like the-" Soun's mouth was forced shut by Genma.

"Yes… like what's his face…" Genma sighed.

"Still… everyone that you harmed… at MY DOJO!" Soun let out his demon head.

*Splash* [I'm just a cute little panda…]

**"SAOTOME!"** Soun yelled.

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"I don't know… You still want to do it?" Ranma asked Kasumi.

"If it's fine with you." Kasumi smiled.

"Alright, but be gentle… This is my first time…"

Ranma lifted the water over her head.

"Nyrall?"

"Aw… you're so cute!" Kasumi smiled. "Here kitty, kitty."

Ranma leapt into Kasumi's arms after stuffing her clothes in her bag.

"Aw… a nice kitty, kitty, aren't you!"

"Nyra!" Ranma purred.

Kasumi then turned off the lights and sat in her bed, Ranma's bag next to her.

"Nice Kitty… Good kitty." She petted Ranma.

"Nya…" Ranma purred.

"Mrwahhahaaha!" Kaumi did an evil laugh, the barely visible light shining on her face.

"Nyra?" Ranma raised an eyebrow.

"Oh my… That was quite evil, yes…" Kasumi looked concerned.

"Nyahh!" Ranma purred.

"Oh well… good night, Kitty Ranma!" Kasumi put her on her bag and got in bed.

"Nra Nyaght…" Ranma replied, falling fast asleep curled up on her bag.

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**Author's notes:** Is that clearer now? Hmmm? Hmmm? Yeah… now stop… being… so… silly! Ranma with a guy… Ha! The Text laughs in your face!


	4. III

Ranma-chan, the Cat

~Noy Telinú~

**Warning:** fiction made by fans is not completely accurate to the source material. That said, Noy tries to make it make sense. None of us are Rumiko, after all…

**Caution:** do not try this at home… EVAR!

**Thank you:** tuatara for getting Noy to finish this chapter.

**This fanfic is dedicated to Kris Leena:** may she find eternal happiness in the afterlife.

You have been warned…

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**_III_**: The Revenge of the Mother

The Tendos' neighbors blasted their usual morning music as Ranma yawned and stretched, awakening from her slumber.

Unsurprisingly, this got the attention of the oldest Tendo daughter.

"Kitty Ranma, you're awake." Kasumi smiled as usual. "I was about to leave the room. Care to join me in some morning tea? In your normal form, of course."

"Nyrall!" Ranma answered, flipping herself over to put her cat arms through her knapsack bag.

"Ooh! You're so cute!" Kasumi nearly squealed. "I'm almost tempted not to give you hot water. But that would be mean of me, wouldn't it?"

"Nyra…"

"Oh, yes, to whatever you said, Ranma-kitty!" Kasumi opened the door and followed Ranma out of her room.

Ranma curled up on a cushion at the table while Kasumi got the tea.

"Hello?" A voice came from outside. "I would ring the doorbell, but there isn't one."

"Oh my…" Kasumi hurried to the door. 'I didn't know that someone was coming over…'

"Ah, good morning," the person greeted. "I have a package for Nabiki…"

"Oh, Ms.…" A car honked as it went by not far from them. "It is good to see you again. Here, I'll take that."

The woman whose name was censored by the car nodded. "Yes. Yes, it is… Well, I've got to get back to work, although I am curious why you sister ordered a…" She left it hanging.

Kasumi nodded. "So am I… Thank you!"

And so the woman left and Kasumi went inside.

'Still, what would Nabiki want with a…' Kasumi's thoughts were interrupted by footsteps she heard outside.

Kasumi was ready this time and opened up the door after the first knock.

Hands free of packages, Kasumi smiled her best. "Hello and welcome to… are you alright?"

The woman in front of her looked weary and sleep deprived. "Yes… just… tired, that's all… Is… is this the Tendo dojo?"

The woman's hair, while mostly well groomed, was a little wild and untamed. Her clothes were dirty at the edges and were noticeably faded. Bags were under her eyes while her eyes drooped.

All in all, she looked like she was going to fall over due to exhaustion.

"Yes, it is. Please come inside," Kasumi said as she led the woman in. "Would you like some tea?"

"Yes, thank you," the woman answered. "I have… I… Is my… Please, let her be here…"

Kasumi was curious and when she sat the woman down at the table she asked, "Sorry, I didn't get your name…"

"Nodoka Saotome…" Nodoka answered before her head fell down and landed on the table.

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Ranma the kitty cat tilted her head as she saw a strange woman collapse at the table she was sitting at.

"Nerawll?" Ranma jumped onto the table. "Nyra?"

Kasumi was still in shock at seeing Ranma's mother here at her home.

Ranma patted the woman with her paw and got no response. "Nyoro~n…"

Kasumi shook her head to get out of her stupor. "Oh my… Ranma kitty… I… I'll go get your hot water…"

The oldest Tendo hurried off to the kitchen.

"Nyraaaa…" Ranma stared at Nodoka.

Nodoka opened her eyes and turned her head to face Ranma. "Ranma? I heard someone say… Ranma?"

The red cat strutted over to Nodoka and rubbed her head with her own head. "Nyan…"

"Oh my!" Kasumi came back with the water. "How cute!"

Ranma turned to Kasumi excitedly. "Nayan?"

"Sit down and I will change you back." Kasumi smiled.

"Change back… where's Ranma…" Nodoka lifted her head slightly before it fell down again.

*Splash* Ranma changed back.

Shaking the water out of her hair, the newly-returned girl glomped her mother.

"Mom!" Ranma cried. "I'm right here, Mom!"

Nodoka lifted her head up again. "Ranma?"

"I'm here mom! You're here!" Ranma had tears going down her cheeks.

A wobbly Nodoka got herself off the table and weakly returned her daughter's hug. "Ranma… I finally found you…"

With that, unconsciousness overwhelmed Nodoka, a smile evident on her face.

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"So, that's your mother…" Akane pushed the hair out of her face as she kneeled next to Nodoka. "I can see the resemblance…"

Ranma nodded as best she could with her head on Nodoka's chest.

"Guess Kuno-baby gets that photo after all." Nabiki smirked. "Go easier on him today, sis."

Akane frowned and bit her lip. "Could he just… not attack me?"

Nabiki rolled her eyes. "Really?"

Akane sighed. "No luck for ME today, huh?"

"Nope," Nabiki laughed.

"SoOo cute!" Kasumi was full of glee.

Nabiki sighed. "Come on, Akane, let's get to school…"

Akane reluctantly agreed. "Bye, Ranma… take good care of your mother…"

"I will…" Ranma answered, steel in her voice, "I will…"

Kasumi blinked in surprise and looked at Akane. "Come home right after school."

Akane nodded and left.

"I'll protect you, Mom… I promise…" Ranma vowed as she hugged her mother tighter.

"…" Kasumi tilted her head, question mark appearing above her. 'Who would want to harm her?'

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"Mom? Mom?" Ranma kneeled by her mother as she opened her eyes.

'Where am I… That voice… ?' Nodoka's vision cleared to see a kneeling redhead crying.

"Mom!" Ranma smiled. "You're awake!"

"Ran… ma?" Nodoka tried sitting up.

"Let me help you, Mom…" Ranma sat up her mother. "I'm here, Mom…"

"Ranma!" Nodoka cried. "I finally found you…"

The girl hugged her mother. "I missed you so…"

"Good to see you…" Nodoka's eyes suddenly widened. "Where's your father?"

Ranma clenched her jaw. "China… probably. He's out of our hair, that's for sure."

"Oh My!" Kasumi put a hand to her mouth. "You're awake! Here, I have some food for you…"

"Thank you…" Nodoka would have bowed if she wasn't sitting up at the moment.

The two girls got her to the table to eat and sat quietly, one looking at Nodoka with concern, the other with a smile and a tilted head.

"Daughter… I do have something to ask…" Nodoka, strength back, put her chopsticks to her lips. "How do you have red hair?"

"Oh, that," Ranma sighed in relief. "It's the hair color I was supposed to have; my eyes are even bluer too. I had a drink of something… Anyway, it doesn't matter now, 'cause I have these."

Ranma pulled out hair combs from her bag. "These can change my hair color 'cause it's magic. Watch."

Ranma pulled out a black one and combed it through her hair. "Tada!"

Kasumi clasped her hands together. "Wonderful magic trick!"

Nodoka smiled. "I am glad that nothing bad has happened… Nothing bad has happened, right?"

Ranma gulped nervously. "Well…"

"Hi! We're home!" Akane announced as she and Nabiki came through the door.

Ranma sighed in relief.

"Hello, there." Akane bowed to Nodoka. "I am glad that you look well… I'm Akane Tendo and I'm happy that Ranma has her mother back in her life."

"You're welcome!" Nabiki shouted.

Unfortunately, that shout happened when Kasumi was drinking water and it caused her to let the glass go flying…

*Splash*

… Causing Ranma to change into a cat.

"…" Ranma's ears fell flat against her head. "Noyor~n"

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"HOW MANY?" Soun wasn't angry… he was just a demon head.

"Gulf gruff gruu guru." Genma sweated tremendously.

"**ONLY** FOUR?" Soun screamed in rage, tongue flapping wildly.

"Grub gun, green grub, glug guff," Genma spoke nervously.

Soun's eye twitched and the illusion disappeared. "Saotome… you had our agreement…"

The panda nodded.

"The Kuonji girl…"

Genma took out a sign. [Not _really_…]

"WHO ELSE?" Soun bellowed.

"Grull, grill, gublle gaba gabA," Genma groaned.

"RICE, FISH, AND A** PICKLE**?" Soun couldn't believe it.

[TWO pickles…] Genma corrected.

"WHAT'S THE LAST ONE?"

Genma shrugged.

"YOU DON'T KNOW?" Soun picked up his friend and shook him.

"Gorganzola!" Genma whined.

"…" Soun took a deep breath. "Anything else?"

"Goofy goober."

"… I see…" Soun dropped him. "This could get bad…"

"Gurphshh…" Genma didn't seem too concerned.

"NO! WE BOTH KNOW THAT MAGIC IS BAD!" Soun was gripping his head.

[Hey, at least I'm not emotional about it.] Genma threw the sign at Soun.

"This is bad, this is bad, this is bad, bad, bad…" Soun was mumbling to himself.

"Grek goof." Genma rolled his eyes.

"THAT WAS DIFFERENT!" Soun yelled. "YOU SHOULD PAY THE PRICE TOO!"

[Nuh uh, _I_ have a son…] Genma smirked.

Soun facefaulted.

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"… And that's when Akane found me next to the furo…" Ranma, human again, recalled the conditions of a certain Jusenkyo curse and its aftermath. "Then she snuck me to her room, fixed me up and I agreed to stay once their father left if Akane could help me out in a few things Pops neglected to tell me about girls…"

Nodoka was shocked, outraged (in a Japanese AND motherly way), worried, and saddened by her daughter's story.

Kasumi's eyes were wide and she couldn't speak.

Nabiki was surprised on how bad the situation was and felt some sympathy. Not a lot, just a bit.

Akane… well…

'That jerk!' Akane's thoughts oozed with betrayal. 'My own father is helping with this? And her father! OOHH! Learning how this magic curse happened… Wait, is she talking about me?'

"That's about it… Oh, and they said that they would help me find you." Ranma closed her eyes as her mother continued to glomp her… like she did for the entire story.

"My poor baby…" Nodoka cried again as Ranma's shirt was already soaked by tears.

"Jeez, Ranma, what's with the calm look?" Nabiki shook her head. "I'm going to my room. No need to thank me for my help…"

"It's not that bad of a curse…" Ranma mumbled.

"Yeah, at least you're not a boy…" Akane smiled. "I'm glad you two are together."

Nodoka was still a wreck. "All of those horrible things…"

Kasumi finally got out of her stupor. "You may use the furo if you want. I… I need to do… something…"

Kasumi headed for her room, shakily.

"Come on, Mom, a bath is a great idea." Ranma dragged her mother to the bath. "Hey, Akane, thanks for everything…"

'But I didn't…' Akane watched the Saotomes go away. 'I almost killed you… If my sister wasn't there…'

Akane shook her head and went to the dojo, anger resurfacing.

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Ranma hugged her mother as they soaked in the furo. "I missed you, Mom…"

Nodoka sighed blissfully. "I missed you too…"

"Mom?" Ranma bit her lip. "Where were you all these years?"

Nodoka cried. "I was looking for you… Your father took you away when you were only two… He… he was devastated that he was sterile... and was determined to find some way to have an heir…"

"Wait, are you sure that Pops is my real—" Ranma grew nervous.

"Yes, I didn't sleep with anyone else…" Nodoka cut Ranma off.

"So… since I'm still his DAUGHTER…" Ranma managed to smile. "Pops failed…"

Nodoka sobbed. "I have my daughter back…"

"And I have my mom back…" Ranma smiled.

Nodoka nodded, content with holding her daughter.

They were like that for a few minutes, quietly holding each other, when Ranma spoke. "I have something to ask you… Mom, why do you have a katana with you?"

"…" Nodoka was shocked at the question. "I… It's… it's the Saotome family blade… I've been teaching myself… I would do anything to be with you again…"

Ranma shrugged. "OK. I don't care what you did, Mom. It's not like Pops and I were angels either… I'm just so glad that you're here…"

Nodoka smiled. "Thank you…"

Ranma smirked. "I'm curious, though… What were you doing the last 14 years?"

"I wasn't having an exciting adventure or anything…" Nodoka drawled.

"I don't care, tell me!" Ranma smiled.

"Only if you tell me about your training trip," Nodoka answered.

Ranma sweated. "Um… I don't think I want to tell scary stories… This is a _happy_ occasion!"

Nodoka gripped Ranma tighter. "What did he do?"

Ranma shivered at the coldness of her mother's voice. "Well… do… do I have to?"

"Ranma, please tell me, I must know," Nodoka pleaded.

The girl gulped and reluctantly began.

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Akane breathed deeply.

"Ya!" *Crack* The blue-haired girl smashed a cinderblock with her hand.

While the youngest Tendo knew that she felt better doing the breathing exercises and relaxing while practicing her art, she was far too angry to attempt either.

"Hah!" *Crack* Akane destroyed yet another cinderblock.

Besides, it got her mind off the problem and the normalcy of destroying things helped her mood.

*Crack* There went another cinderblock.

Of course, she couldn't keep her mind off it completely, and the reason why she was smashing things resurfaced when she ran out of blocks.

'Stupid panda doing that stupid thing that's so stupid because HE'S STUPID!' Akane grunted as her fists balled. 'All that time she had a mother and that… that PANDA wouldn't allow them to see each other! HONESTLY! If he were here…'

At her feet, the 47 destroyed cinderblocks rattled and vibrated as Akane stomped in rage as she paced, not having anything left to smash.

'And he tried to make her a BOY! And for that BOY to marry me or my sisters! While her mother was… WAS…' Akane's mind quieted as her gaze fell upon her own mother's shrine in the dojo.

The youngest Tendo bowed her head and her breathing slowed.

Akane stood there for a good two minutes before her head moved up, tears silently flowing out of her eyes.

A low whisper came out of her mouth, unable to be heard by anyone living. "I won't let him separate them, Mom…"

With that she turned and left the dojo.

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Somewhere in Japan, a panda shivered.

"Saotome? What's wrong?" Soun asked as the duo trekked towards the coast.

[Just had a bad feeling…] Flip. [Felt like someone after me again.]

Soun turned around and saw nothing unusual.

"Maybe it's just your imagination…" Soun shrugged.

[I hope so.] Flip. [I did anger a lot of people on my training trip with the boy.] Flip. [Maybe they're at your dojo?] Flip. [That poster did say it was looking for my wife.] Flip. [But, maybe it's nothing after all.] Flip. [Let's just hurry…]

Soun agreed and they picked up the pace.

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Nabiki flipped the page of her magazine, her feet banging against each other in the air when there was a knock on her door.

"What do you want?" Nabiki took a potato chip from her bag… and ATE IT!

"I need to talk to you, Nabiki." Kasumi's voice came from behind the door warily.

The middlest Tendo daughter raised an eyebrow. "Rea-A-ally…"

Kasumi nodded, not that Nabiki could see. "Yes… I need to."

The younger of the two sighed and grudgingly got up to unlock and open the door.

"What is that you need to talk to me about?" Nabiki took a lick from a giant lollipop that she had.

Kasumi fidgeted and walked inside her sister's room, causing Nabiki to shrug and close the door.

"I… I don't mean to be rude…" Kasumi wrung her hands. "It's just… Oh my…"

Nabiki flopped onto her bed. "GoOo on…"

Kasumi was becoming a nervous wreck. "I… I… It's just that I spent some time in my room… thinking things over… and about what is happening now…"

*Lick* went Nabiki's tongue on a lollipop.

"It's… um… it was when I thought about you… and…" Kasumi bit her lip. "I… Oh dear…"

Nabiki's eyes narrowed slightly. "Whatever it is, just say it. You're only this nervous when it comes to discipline. What did I do NOW?"

Kasumi swallowed. "Well, I don't think badly of you, Nabiki, it's just… well… I KNOW you and…"

"Do I have to guess or what?" Nabiki licked her lollipop unconcerned and a little irritated.

Kasumi swallowed. "I… For the good of everyone… Please don't take advantage of Ranma and her mother in a… female doggish way… Oh my!"

*Clank* Nabiki dropped her lollipop… into her bag of potato chips… which landed on the metal spoon of an empty bowl of ice cream.

"What?" Nabiki asked, a little shocked at what she heard.

Kasumi took a deep breath and continued. "You end up doing… immoral… things for money. I do not want any harm to come to our guests. Please, Nabiki, when I saw them together, it just… I… it reminded me… of Mother…"

Nabiki curled up and turned towards the window. "So, that's what you think of me… huh?"

Kasumi, eyes watering, piped up. "Nabiki, no… I…"

Her sister let out a little laugh. "You guess right… it's who I am… after all… But I'm not an evil overload, older sister… I just take advantage of my situation; I'm a businesswoman, looking for EASY money…"

Kasumi looked away.

"I won't do anything," Nabiki said, finally. "There's nothing to be gained."

The oldest Tendo daughter sighed in relief.

"Still… it was pretty cruel to bring up Mommy…" Nabiki added. "So, for that, I need 9,000 yen. It can be from Daddy's 'secret' stash if you need to…"

Kasumi frowned. "Nabiki, that's terrible!"

Her sister shrugged. "I'll do it myself, don't worry. You don't have to get your hands dirty."

Kasumi shook her head in disappointment.

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"… And that's when we arrived at Jusenkyo…" Ranma sighed, still looking behind her mother as she gripped her daughter in a further and further tightening hug that would have crushed a weaker person. 'There, that's good and vauge enough to cover everything that she needs to know. No way I'll tell Mom about the Nekoken… Man, I hate that memory…'

Nodoka didn't have any tears left, her face turning more and more mother bearlike instead of crying. "Thank you… my daughter… I know that must have been hard for you to say…"

Ranma shrugged. "I think we should get out now… I'm pruning, and if it gets any colder, I'll change."

Nodoka nodded and the two got out of the furo.

"… Not that I don't appreciate this… but… you can let go now…" Ranma sweatdropped.

"Oh, right… sorry…" Nodoka let go of her daughter, causing her arms to crack and pop at the joints.

"Wow… how long were we in there?" Ranma wondered.

Nodoka shrugged. "Now, I guess it's my turn…"

Ranma nodded.

Her mother sighed. "Very well… When I was pregnant with you, everyone thought that you were going to be a boy."

Ranma's eyes widened.

"We did everything that would guarantee a son. I ate the right foods, you were conceived on the right day, I was in the right position… all the traditional myths on conceiving a son I ended up doing." Nodoka looked down. "Yet, I had a daughter… a beautiful daughter… and we named you Ranma months in advance."

Ranma looked away as well.

"Your father was furious, so we tried again and again… But during my pregnancy, he ended up being in a training accident… or was it accidents… that ended up causing him to be infertile." Nodoka frowned. "So when you were two years old, he took you from me, willing to do anything for a male heir…"

Ranma looked up at her mother to see tears forming once again… replenished at last.

"I couldn't find you two!" Nodoka let the tears flow. "I searched and I asked and I wandered but it was no use!"

Ranma hugged her mother. "I'm here, Mom…"

"And then I would go home to find postcards from him… Monthly postcards telling me, without much detail at all, what was happening with you!" Nodoka's face started showing her anger. "I took the Saotome blade with me and tried to find you… but I couldn't! That's when I started training to use the family sword so I could get you back… I traveled from one side of Japan to the other and saw a lot of strange things, but nothing that would help me find you… I missed you so much!"

Nodoka was really bawling now. "I missed you so much!"

"Shhh… there, there, Mom… it's alright… We're together now…" Ranma reassured, tears in her eyes.

"I didn't think I would see you again…" Nodoka cried. "I received a postcard telling me that you two would be heading to China to finally have a son… I was so scared… I ended up selling everything that wasn't personal and with only the supplies I needed, I headed out for China to find you…"

Ranma sniffed.

"I didn't make it far… I was too tired, too weak from not eating… But then I saw a poster for someone looking for me… I couldn't take any chances and I ran back… to here… where I found you at last…" Nodoka couldn't kneel much longer and she was falling over. "I found you at last…"

Ranma looked her mother in the eyes. "Mom…"

But that's when Nodoka fell over once again, completely exhausted.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Kasumi was in the kitchen, trying to forget what Nabiki had done just moments before. While she had known that her younger sister's morals to be somewhat… flexible, Kasumi was still unraveled to hear that Nabiki would use their mother's memory to get money from her.

The oldest Tendo daughter shook her head clear when Akane walked by solemnly.

"Akane?" Kasumi was starting to worry with all the sadness in her home. "Are you alright? You look distraught…"

The youngest Tendo sighed as she stopped, face away from her sister. "No… I feel terrible. But it doesn't matter. I was just… thinking of Mom… that's all…"

Kasumi hugged Akane from behind, and both were silent for a few moments.

Of course, that's when Nabiki walked by with 9,000 yen in her hands.

"…" Nabiki was stared at by her sisters. "What? I am NOT hugging you two, alright?"

Akane thought over what to do; it had been years since she hugged Nabiki. 'Think, what would Ranma do? No… Ranma hasn't done anything to help… but she's so cute as a cat… Cute… she called me cute! That's it! I'll be cute! Like a cat! But how do I do that? I don't turn into a cat… Now… why are cats cute? Hmm… it's… eyes! Puppy dog eyes! That's it! I'll do that!'

Nabiki blinked when her sister quivered her lip and failed to try and act cute. "What the?"

Akane frowned. 'Alright, plan B. Do what I'm good at…'

The youngest pulled the middle child into the group hug by force.

"Hey! What do you think you're doing?" Nabiki yelped.

"Trying to be together… AS A FAMILY!" Akane stressed.

Kasumi smiled as they hugged Nabiki tight, causing the middle child to squirm.

It would have been funny… OK, it WAS, but then something happened…

"HELP! AKANE! KASUMI! HELP!" Ranma's voice screamed from the bathroom.

Instantly, the mood changed.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Akane arrived first, as she ran there. Unfortunately, in her haste, she couldn't watch where her feet were and in the process, ended up kicking the bucket… of cold water once she opened the screen door to the inner bath.

*Splash* The water predictably hit Ranma in the face.

"NYRAHH!" Ranma yelled in cat, eyes narrowed.

"Whoops… sorry… um… I suppose you can't tell me what's wrong now… being a cat and all…" Akane blushed and twiddled her fingers, looking down.

Ranma facepalmed and pointed at her mother on the floor, out cold… unmoving…

Akane's eyes went wide. "Mrs. Saotome! Your mother!"

Immediately Akane was at the woman's side, fretting nervously. "Um… UM!"

Ranma tilted her head to the side. "Neyrowah?"

That's when Kasumi arrived, Nabiki right behind her. "Oh my!" the older one exclaimed. "Akane, check her pulse!"

"Err…" Akane started sweating nervously. "Uh, how about YOU come and take care of Ranma's mother… I'll… get Ranma changed back… Yeah."

Kasumi nodded and got down to business while Akane stood up and went over to Ranma, who was sitting next to her mom, ears drooped.

"Ranma…" Akane went to go pick up the cat. "Let's change you back into a human…"

Said cat's ear perked up at the sound of her voice. "Nyan?"

Once Akane's hand was within centimeters, Ranma jumped up her arm and ran across the girl until she reached her head. Then the cat jumped off into the furo.

*Splash* The water was mildly displaced.

Not much time passed before Ranma resurfaced… still a cat.

"Nyrawlll…" Ranma grumbled and jumped out.

"I guess the water was too cold, huh?" Akane was able to pick up the cat this time. "Let's go heat some up…"

Ranma nodded in agreement.

Nabiki, meanwhile, slipped over to Kasumi. "So… how is she?"

Kasumi looked up. "Alive. Most likely it is exhaustion or too much hot air. Probably needs rest… Here, help me carry her to the living room."

"Um, no offense, but, shouldn't Akane be doing this?" Nabiki raised an eyebrow. "She the strong one... Heck, we haven't done martial arts in ten years… and I only do enough exercise to stay in shape."

"Well, I suppose that would be the safest plan…" Kasumi had a hand to her mouth, thoughtful.

"Of course it is…" Nabiki shrugged.

Kasumi mused. "Yes… of course… Then you should go get a blanket and pillow for her."

Nabiki frowned. "Dang it, walked right into that… Wait… what will YOU be doing?"

"Getting her clothes," her sister answered. "Of course, you COULD just walk away, earning the wrath and shame of both your sisters… and most likely Ranma… not to mention what her mother would think when she wakes up…"

"Alright, alright, I get it… jeez!" Nabiki grumbled and walked away to find what was needed.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

"There!" Akane smiled as she turned on the stove. "It shouldn't take too long now…"

"Nyran…" Ranma stared at the kettle.

"No… you shouldn't do that… A watched pot never boils…" Akane pointed her finger upwards.

Ranma smiled and faced Akane. "Nyan, Nyrraaa…"

"Um… yes… it is a kettle… Is that what you said?" Akane guessed.

Ranma sighed. "Nyidiotan…"

"That's just so weird…" Akane gazed in wonder. "… A cat sighing…"

"Stupid guilt trip… *mumble mumble*…" Nabiki muttered as she approached the girl and her cat… friend. "Akane, go carry Ranma's mom to where Kasumi needs her to be. You're the only one strong enough to do it."

"Nyan!" Ranma meowed in Japanese.

"Yes, yes, Ranma, but you're a cat at the moment." Nabiki rolled her eyes.

Akane gasped. "YOU know what she's saying?"

Nabiki looked at Akane like the latter was an idiot. "Oh, yes, of COURSE I did… you idiot, I just was making an observation. Like it's really possible to understand what an animal is saying."

Elsewhere, their father sneezed.

"Oh…" Akane blushed with embarrassment. "Well… I… uh… better do that thing that I need to do… I'll be back soon, Ranma."

The cat nyan-ed.

"Don't look at me like that, cat." Nabiki narrowed her eyes.

"Nya…" Ranma cooed.

Nabiki sighed and headed for the stairs. "What-ever…"

Eventually, the kettle was ready and Ranma tried to grasp it with her hands.

*Slip…* The kettle squirmed out of her hands and tumbled to the ground…

*BANG!* But Ranma jumped down to catch it, causing said kettle to smack the cat it the head, spilling its contents onto her.

"… Ow…" Ranma rubbed her head as she got up off the floor.

'I just HAD to go when I finished carrying Ranma's mom to where Kasumi wanted her… I hope Ranma didn't burn herself on the stove…' Akane returned at that moment. "Oh… Ranma, um… do you want me to get your clothes or…"

"Nah, I'll get it. Thanks, Akane…" Ranma ran back to the bathroom.

"…" Akane blinked. "Wow, she's fast…"

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

"Ra-n-ma…" Nodoka said weakly as she awoke after dinner. "*Cough* MmmMMMM! Ah, That's better… Ranma!"

"Yes, I'm here, Mom…" Ranma held her mother's hand as she laid there next to the table.

"What happened?" Nodoka rubbed her face. "Last I remember, I…"

Tears started forming in Nodoka's eyes.

"It's fine, Mom… we are alright…" Ranma reassured her mother.

Nodoka shook her head. "No, it isn't… there were many things… many, many things that I couldn't do with you as mother and daughter…"

"Oh…" Ranma looked away. "Still… I could… we… could still do… stuff…"

Nodoka nodded. "Yes… Now that we are together… I have 14 years of mothering to do…"

Ranma smiled. "Yeah… there's that."

"Still…" Nodoka frowned. "Our family's heirlooms, history… all of that is not with me… Oh, how I wish to share it with you…"

"'But we can!" Ranma protested. "Didn't you say that you buried it?"

Nodoka smiled slightly. "Yes, but… there's no way for me to retrieve it-"

Ranma cut her off. "I can! Just tell me where it is and I can get it!"

"Sweetie… there are numerous items, some quite heavy… I had to drag some places and…" Nodoka cried. "How can you carry them back?"

Ranma rolled her eyes. "Really? Mom, Pops trained me for YEARS. This will be a piece of cake… plus, I have this bag that can hold an infinite number of things… I can… no, I WILL do it!"

"…" Nodoka thought it over. "Alright, my dearest daughter… I will tell you where I buried it…"

Ranma smiled.

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A pigtailed girl with magically black hair and the appearance of a boy of the same age… with a height problem… walked down the streets of Nerima, irritated over a note of directions in her hand.

"Yeah, VERY specific, Mom…" Ranma sighed. "An empty lot next to a building that was for sale… Great…"

The girl had been looking for over an hour already and still didn't find anything that looked like what was described.

"Well… this building says sold… it's the best lead I've had…" Ranma shrugged and entered the lot next to it.

The lot was barren for the most part, a tree near a wall, and some grass unevenly spread all over. But, what really caught Ranma's eye was the dirt in one corner that looked as if it were unearthed and wasn't put back quite right.

Smiling, Ranma started towards it, but stopped suddenly when in the middle of the lot.

'Someone is here…' Ranma thought and turned heel quickly, eyes growing wide.

There, standing not too far away was a masculine figure, eyes narrowed.

"Ranma Saotome… I found you at last." The figure looked up, eyes locking with Ranma's, promising to bring pain.

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**Author's notes:** CLIFFHANGER! AHHH! Who could it be? O_o tune in next time to find out! Oh, and for readers that came from Rankofics… I, the Text would like to say… Thanks for noticing! Yes! Whoo! Yay! Till next time! ^_^

**Authour's notes:** Noy and I have been feeling the need to do more, so... we are at fukufics! Yes! Plus, the poll is open to determine which pairing we will write for our January 2013 new years fic, so far, Shampoo has no votes, Shampoo sad. But! for nearly everyone else, its a close race! AHH! Vote soon, because polling ends in August, (We need time to write it, after all.) And MY ideas, sine they're MINE, not Noy's, who just makes it coherent, are very interesting whacky, if I do say so myself. Nabiki's and Shampoo's are the ones, though, I think that will be the most unique, so... anyway, vote, pm, do anything to get your voices heard. Because we listen to you. Oh and I haz Ranma fanfic wiki page! Yay! Tuatara made it, THANKS! ~_^


	5. IIII

Ranma-chan, the Cat

~Noy Telinú~

**Warning:** not all fanfiction is the same. Neither is all fiction. Generalizing is bad, M'kay?

**Caution:** this fic has a long, long way to go before it's finished. A long, long way. As it is only one of many being written by Noy, expect some delays, sorry.

**Notice:** that this is an update, and it will not be abandoned. The TEXT has spoken!

You have been warned….

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_**IIII**_: Awkward!

Ranma crossed her arms as she stared down her opponent.

"I have finally found you, Ranma!" the figure spoke coldly. "At last I will have my revenge."

Ranma, meanwhile, was thinking up a storm. 'What was his name? What's his name, name, name, why can't I remember his name!?'

The figure didn't waste any time and attacked.

Ranma easily back flipped away, avoiding the giant spatula that the figure wielded.

That's when it hit her.

"Ucchan!" Ranma said suddenly. "Ukyo Kuonji! Oh, MAN! It's so good to see you! Where have you been these last… ten years? I didn't think I would see you again!"

Ukyo growled. "What do you THINK I was doing, JACKASS!? After you and your father abandoned me, my life was RUINED!"

Ranma scratched her head. "What are you talking about?"

Ukyo answered with a strike that was easily avoided.

"Stay still, JACKASS!" Ukyo yelled.

The pigtailed girl didn't, however.

"Look, Ukyo, why are you so mad?" Ranma asked. "I didn't want to leave the area, but Pops said… stuff… Besides, things are different now…"

Ukyo took out three small spatulas. "DIFFERENT? HOW!?"

Ranma dodged the small spatulas Ukyo threw at her and frowned. "OK, stop this. It's ridiculous."

Ukyo seethed and charged, slashing madly.

After a minute, Ranma had enough and knocked the giant spatula skyward.

"Ucchan, what has gotten into you!?" Ranma grabbed her old friend by the shoulders. "So we couldn't stay around. It doesn't mean you have to kill me!"

Ukyo looked down at Ranma, being four inches taller. "YOU don't care, do you!? Being ditched by your…"

That is when the spatula came down right between them, tearing both their shirts open at once.

Both figures gasped at once and exclaimed in unison, "YOU'RE A GIRL!?"

Lightning struck nearby, the flash illuminating both figures.

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Ranma and Ukyo were seated back to back in the lot, each in deep thought.

"So…" Ranma broke the silence. "Whatcha been up to these last ten years?"

Ukyo sighed. "Oh, just living by myself, forsaking my femininity, and training by the sea to get my revenge on you. And yourself?"

"Not allowed to HAVE any femininity, training and being abused by my dad and living as a boy." Ranma let out her breath. "Well, this is awkward."

Ukyo nodded. "Yeah… I guess it is…"

They were quiet for a while, both not noticing that the storm had passed.

"So… this revenge thing, what was that all about?" Ranma asked.

"Nothing anymore." Ukyo lowered her head. "I was just going to beat you up a little for ditching me."

"I wanted to stay," Ranma admitted. "Pops didn't want me to. Sorry, Ucchan."

Ukyo shook her head. "No need to, it was stupid anyway. I should have known you were a girl…"

Ranma laughed. "Ucchan, don't feel bad. **I** didn't know I was a girl until much later."

"How?" Ukyo raised an eyebrow. "How can you not know that you're a girl?"

Ranma shrugged. "Pops never told me the difference. Not to mention we stayed away from people for the most part."

"I see…" Ukyo sighed once more. "Guess we're more alike than we thought, huh, Ran-chan? At least I chose to do this…"

"I still don't understand… WHY did you do this?" Ranma wondered. "Why give up being a girl?"

Ukyo blew some hair out of her eyes. "Figures he didn't tell you. We're engaged, Ran-chan; you were supposed to take me with you. The cart was my dowry."

Ranma cringed, her mind racing. 'We… we're engaged!? That means… Alright, play it cool, Ranma. She might not swing that way.'

"That's why I wanted revenge." Ukyo facepalmed. "All the girls mocked me for not being to hold onto my fiancé. So I gave up being a girl."

"You're good at it, that's for sure," Ranma admitted. "So, what now?"

"I don't know…" Ukyo looked down to the ground. "I don't think I can go back and live like a girl anymore anyway. Not after all of this."

"There's nothing wrong with what you're doing, Ucchan." Ranma turned around. "I'm doing the same thing, really. And even learning that I'm a girl, I'm not going to be like the rest."

Ukyo sighed. "It's all I know anyway. I'm such a tomboy."

Ranma hugged Ukyo from behind. "But you're also my friend, Ucchan. I got your back."

Ukyo managed to smile. "And I got your back. Come on, let's get off the ground."

They both got to their feet and faced each other, each noticing that their breasts were slightly exposed.

"Hard to see you like a boy this way, Ucchan." Ranma smiled.

"Same here." Ukyo smirked. "You're so short."

Ranma rolled her eyes. "Oh ha, ha, never heard that before. You're not so tall either."

Ukyo crossed her arms. "I'm close enough."

"Whatever." Ranma looked over the lot. "I was here to get stuff that Mom buried. Can you help me find it?"

Ukyo shrugged. "Sure, why not?"

Ranma's stomach growled.

"…" Ukyo smiled. "Then I'll make you something to eat. I did say that my first Okonomiyaki would be yours, didn't I?"

Ranma smiled in return.

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"Thanks for letting me use this cart, Ucchan." Ranma smiled as she tested the cart carrying all the stuff that was buried in the lot.

"Don't mention it," Ukyo waved it off. "Now, let's get you something to eat."

Ranma giddily entered Ukyo's restaurant.

"So, what will it be?" Uktyo asked. "Pork? Shrimp?"

"You know what I like." Ranma smirked.

Ukyo nodded. "Everything, got it."

As the grill was fired up, Ranma took a look around the restaurant.

It wasn't that big, and most of the seats were around the grill. But it had the family-run look of a humble restaurant that people seemed to love. And the pigtailed girl seated at the counter agreed with that.

"Okonomiyaki Ucchan's?" Ranma smiled. "You really did miss me, after all…"

Ukyo shrugged. "I guess I did. I haven't made many friends in years."

Ranma sighed. "Me neither… I can count them on one hand. Wait, with you starting a restaurant here… that means you're staying, aren't ya?"

"Yes. Yes, I am," Ukyo answered. "I needed a new start and with all the things here, well, I figured, why not?"

"So that means I can visit you every day here…" Ranma smiled.

"I suppose so," Ukyo agreed. "Although I'm thinking about going to school here, so I'll only be opened in the morning and after school."

Ranma rubbed her chin. "Furinkan High?"

Ukyo nodded.

"I thought about going as well…" Ranma smiled. "With Mom here, she'll want me to get a good education."

Ukyo smirked. "I'd love to see you in one of those school uniforms. That way I can know you're a girl for sure."

Ranma blanched. "No thanks. I prefer them on other girls…"

Ukyo raised an eyebrow at that.

Ranma sighed. "I'm just not used to it, you know? Besides, there's one guy that's a giant pervert. There's no way I want to be on his list of cute girls he wants to get to 'know better.'"

Ukyo finished the okonomiyaki. "I see… Boys can be crazed perverts, let me tell ya. Sharing a locker room with them lets you really get to know how guys think."

"You can say that again." Ranma rolled her eyes. "Thanks, Ucchan!"

Ukyo laughed as Ranma gobbled up her snack. "Anytime, Ran-chan."

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Nodoka was asleep by the table, dreaming sweet things about being a mother.

Akane was there as well, watching her sleep. It wasn't creepy; it was just a sign of patience and company. Not to mention Akane wanted to wait up for her new friend.

But as the hours passed, Akane was getting sleepy.

After a long while, her eyes finally closed as her head landed in Nodoka's lap.

Of course, that's when Ranma came in.

'Aw… that's so cute.' Ranma grinned. 'Now, I knew that there was a camera in here… Aha!'

*FLASH* A bright light shone upon Akane and Nodoka.

"What?" Akane woke up, rubbing her eye. "Ranma! There you are! What took you so long?"

The pigtailed girl rolled her eyes. "The map I had was terrible. But I got it. How's my mother?"

Akane shrugged as she stood up. "Tired. She's been sleeping this whole time."

"Guess I should let her sleep," Ranma mused. "But do you have a room to put her in, or…?"

"We can use the room you were going to use." Akane shrugged.

"Yeah… let's do that…" Ranma nodded.

With that, the girls carried Nodoka up into the guest room. After a few trips, so was all the stuff Ranma and Ukyo found in the lot.

Akane yawned. "I'm going to bed. Good night."

"Night." Ranma smiled.

After watching Akane walk away, Ranma looked at her mother sleeping.

'She looks so peaceful…' Ranma thought.

After watching for a few moments, Ranma got an idea.

Ranma stripped out of all her clothes and put them away before leaving the room for the kitchen.

Cupping her hands with water from the sink, Ranma splashed herself with the cold water, turning into a tiny red cat.

"Nya!" Ranma hurriedly dashed off upstairs to the room and got into her mother's sleeping arms.

'Goodnight, Mom,' Ranma thought as she slept like a cat with her mother.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

The next morning, Nodoka woke up early, very early. So early that the sun hadn't risen yet.

Nodoka stretched. "Ah! I haven't felt this good in a long while… Where am I?"

The room, she noticed, was spacious. There was a neat pile of many objects she recognized in one corner, however.

"The last thing I remember was…" Nodoka's eyes widened as she felt movement between her breasts.

Nodoka looked down to see a red cat poking its sleeping head out into the air.

"Nyaaa…" it nyaed sleepily.

'So cute!' Nodoka thought. "Little cat, wake up."

Ranma opened her eyes to see her mother smiling at her. "Nyama!"

The little cat was now hugging Nodoka's face.

"Aww…" Nodoka smiled. "You're so cute… Where'd you come from, little cat?"

Ranma sweatdropped. "Nyan…"

"Something about you seems familiar…" Nodoka tapped her lips.

"Naynayya!" Ranma jumped off her face and headed for the bathroom.

"I know that cat… I know it…" Nodoka got up and left the room.

As Ranma ran to get hot water, Kasumi was coming out of her room, humming.

"Good morning, Ranma-kitty." Kasumi smiled as she saw Ranma race down the stairs.

Nodoka walked into the hallway soon after.

"Why, good morning, Mrs. Saotome," Kasumi said with a smile.

Nodoka's eyes shot open as her memories of the day before rushed back in.

"Is that cat… my daughter?" Nodoka shook.

Kasumi tilted her head a bit confused. "Yes. Are you feeling alright?"

Nodoka nodded. "I feel… better… Thank you for your hospitality."

"No trouble at all, Mrs. Saotome." Kasumi closed her eyes.

"Please…" Nodoka stood up straight. "Call me Auntie…"

Kasumi nodded. "Alright, Auntie."

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Ranma, meanwhile, was heating the furo, bored and impatient as she waited for the water to warm up.

Her simple cat mind couldn't hold too many human thoughts thanks to what her father did to her. Nevertheless, her mind had started to adapt since she was cursed, but it would take a while before she could be as competent as she was as… herself.

So it was to no surprise that she found the trashcan incredibly interesting.

That's what Nodoka saw as she entered the bathroom: her cat of a daughter sitting in the trashcan, purring.

"…" Nodoka held back a giggle. "Ranma, please come out of the trashcan."

Ranma nyaed at her and climbed out.

Nodoka noticed that the furo was heating up. "Are you trying to be human again?"

Ranma nodded.

Her mother felt the water and thought it was warm enough.

"Want to get in?" Nodoka smiled.

Ranma responded by jumping into the furo.

"Hi, Mom!" Ranma said as she pushed her hair out of her eyes. "Sleep well?"

Nodoka smiled. "Yes. Although having a cat in your clothes does complicate things…"

Ranma laughed.

Nodoka got undressed and started washing herself. "Now that I am feeling better, we have a few things to discuss…"

Ranma let out a breath. "Yeah… like school?"

Nodoka nodded. "Yes. Kasumi told me this morning that you waited until I came to make a decision about going to high school."

"…" Ranma sighed. "And that's a yes, isn't it?"

"Indeed." Nodoka got into the furo with her daughter. "You'll be going to the same school as the two youngest Tendos."

Ranma gulped, fear rushing through her body. "Did you sign me up yet?"

Nodoka blinked. "No… I just learned about it today."

'Good,' Ranma sighed mentally. "I was just thinking that I would turn in the forms. You know, save you the trouble and all."

Nodoka pursed her lips. "I suppose so…"

Ranma relaxed.

"... I can't wait to see you in your uniform!" Nodoka smiled joyously.

Ranma flinched. "Um… Mom?"

"What is it, my daughter?" Nodoka sighed in contentment.

"Um… well… you see… uh…" Ranma twiddled her fingers.

"What?" Nodoka was now concerned.

Ranma swallowed and turned away. "You see… I'm not… going to wear the uniform…"

"…" Nodoka's eyes went wide. "WHAT?!"

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Genma couldn't help but smile.

Soun looked at his friend oddly. "What is it, Saotome?"

[I don't know. I feel like smiling, that's all… Like my SON is getting what he deserves…] his sign read.

Soun sweatdropped. "You're a bad parent, you know that?"

[Blasphemy!] Genma's sign proclaimed. [I am the standard of great parenting!]

"Right…" Soun sighed. "We should keep moving. Get out of the river, Saotome."

[Not until you commend my parenting skills as the best ever!] Genma crossed his arms defiantly.

"You're so immature, Saotome…" Soun rubbed his temples.

[At least I don't cry all the time!] Genma growled.

"SAOTOME!" Soun yelled as he chased Genma yet again.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Ukyo woke up and stretched, loosening muscles and alleviating her morning aches.

"First day of my new life… I guess." Ukyo shrugged and got up.

The girl took a shower and got dressed, ready for her first day of school. Of course, seeing as she would (as she had for the last ten years) masquerade as a he, it wasn't a skirt or a jumper in which she dressed.

With her breasts bound and her hair in a ponytail, she looked like a young man.

'Whoa, I'm hot,' Ukyo thought to herself as she stood in front of the mirror. "Huh, no wonder Ran-chan thought that…"

Shaking her head, Ukyo got her ingredients out and got ready to open shop for an hour or two.

'Wonder how Ran-chan is doing…' were Ukyo's thoughts as she prepared for the day.

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Ranma tried to steady herself as she sat in the furo with her mother.

"Say that again…" Nodoka couldn't believe what she just heard.

'You can do this, you can do this, you can do this…' Ranma closed her eyes and repeated to herself with as much confidence that she could muster. "I am not wearing a uniform to school."

Nodoka narrowed her eyes. "That's what I thought you said."

Ranma's mind raced to figure out a way to counter what she knew her mother was going to say.

"This decision that you made is disrespectful, daughter." Nodoka resisted scowling. "It is not honorable at all."

Ranma stood her ground. "I have my reasons, Mom."

Nodoka crossed her arms. "What are they?"

The girl forced her body to relax before speaking. "First of all, due to Pops being the selfish crazed monster that he is, I was raised to be a boy and was in the dark about my own sex for most of my life. I only found out I was a girl fairly recently."

Nodoka's face softened a tad. 'Genma, why?'

"Secondly, because of that, I'm extremely uncomfortable being around a bunch of others as a girl. My only experience was two days ago and it kinda didn't go so well…" Ranma rubbed the back of her head.

"You mean to tell me you are going to go to school as a boy?" Nodoka asked heatedly.

Ranma sighed. "Yes… yes, I am."

Nodoka didn't like it. "It's not proper to do this, to lie to the school and your classmates."

"_Proper?_" Ranma was in disbelief. "Mom, I've been doing it this way for as long as I can remember. Besides, if I want any chance of being accepted as a student, I need to use my transcripts from last year… where it says 'male' on it since it's from an _all-boys school_."

Nodoka clenched her jaw. "This is not very ladylike."

"Well, boys are creepy." Ranma shrugged. "It's what I'm doing. I'm more comfortable that way."

Nodoka turned her head and thought it over while Ranma sat and waited in the water.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Akane felt sunlight hit her face, forcing her to open her eyes…

*Flop* Akane flipped over, facing away from the sun.

… Or not.

'Go away, sun. Don't bother me,' Akane thought as she tried to cover her face with a pillow.

Birds chirped near her window.

With a moan, Akane scooted over more, unknowingly letting her leg go over the edge of her bed.

The blue-haired girl, in between sleeping and not, was dreaming about falling…

*THUMP* Akane's body hit the floor.

"Alright, alright, I'm up!" Akane mumbled on the floor.

That's when Kasumi opened the door.

"Akane, it's time to get up." Kasumi smiled sweetly.

Kasumi blinked as she saw Akane on the floor with her blankets draped over her.

"…" Kasumi closed the door slowly.

"…" Akane tried to say something, but couldn't and just got ready instead.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Nodoka was about to voice her decision when Ranma blurted something.

"Mr. Tendo gave his daughters money to pay for my schooling once they 'found' me. Pops wants me to go as a boy, of course." Ranma looked away.

Nodoka's jaw nearly dropped. "That… complicates things."

"It's not that I'm scared of Pops, but… he's Pops…" Ranma leaned her head back. "Alright, I'm scared of him; happy?"

"But… by doing what he wants?" Nodoka asked. "Isn't that going backwards?"

"I just… can't go as a girl, Mom," Ranma sighed. "It might be selfish or subservient or whatever, but I just won't go as a girl. I don't even FEEL like a girl anyway."

"Ranma…" Nodoka closed her eyes.

"Plus, there's my curse, Mom," Ranma reminded. "Do you want a lot of guys trying to turn me into a cat just so they can change me back and see me naked?"

Nodoka took a deep breath. "I… I'll allow you to do this. Mostly due to the difficulties of changing your records, mind you. However, I have many years of parenting to do, young lady. Your father's influence has made this especially hard."

Ranma raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean?"

"What do you know about being a woman, Ranma?" Nodoka asked, putting her child on the spot.

"Not much…" Ranma admitted. "I want to know stuff but still be me, you know?"

Nodoka sighed. 'This is going to be harder than I thought.'

"Hello? Anyone in there?" Akane asked.

Ranma managed to smile. "Come in, Akane. There's room for you!"

Nodoka shook her head. "You've soaked enough, daughter. We need to fill out those forms."

"Alright," Ranma sighed and got out.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Nabiki slowly pulled herself out of bed and down the stairs, her feet dragging and eyes half closed.

"Good morning, Nabiki." Kasumi smiled… as usual.

"Mmmrnn…" Nabiki mumbled as she got to the table and sat down.

Nodoka came into the room and sat down next to the nearly sleeping girl. "Good morning, Nabiki."

"Yeah…" Nabiki nodded. "Tired…."

"I see…" Nodoka paused. "Nabiki, what do you think of my daughter?"

Nabiki rubbed her eyes. "Cat…"

Nodoka nodded. "Yes, she is a cat at times. Do you require something to be fully awake?"

"It'll help," Nabiki drawled. "Didn't get much sleep last night."

Kasumi walked in with tea. "Here, Nabiki; drink up."

"Thanks." Nabiki drank her tea.

Silence washed over the room. The sounds of nature in the morning presented a peaceful atmosphere. A serene peace seemed to be present.

Too bad it wouldn't last.

"My daughter wants to go to school as a boy," Nodoka said as Nabiki looked fully awake.

"…" Nabiki blinked. "That is… interesting… Shouldn't be surprised, though."

Nodoka raised her left eyebrow. "Really? Why do you think so?"

The middle Tendo daughter shrugged. "Just a hunch. She looks like a boy, she talks like a boy, and our fathers even got her engaged to one of us. She was raised like that. Heck, when she goes to AKANE for advice on acting like a girl, you know SOMETHING is off with her."

Nodoka pressed her lips in a thin line. "When you put it like that…"

"Makes a cute-looking guy too," Nabiki noted. "I don't blame her wanting to go as a boy to school, though. She'd be even more popular than Akane if she tried to go as a girl. Ranma is just so awkward in feminine clothes, and being a martial artist… Kuno-baby wouldn't be able to keep his hands off her."

THAT made Nodoka think.

Kasumi started bringing in breakfast.

Nabiki drank more tea. "What is she doing right now? Hmm? Is it something feminine? Traditional?"

Nodoka sighed. "No… she's doing… something else."

"Martial arts in the dojo," Nabiki answered more clearly. "'Bout time someone uses that besides Akane."

Nodoka looked over towards the dojo. "Do you think it's a good idea? Being such… a tomboy?"

"And that's-s-s-s-s bad?" Nabiki raised an eyebrow.

"Well, yes," Nodoka answered. "It is not proper. These girls today, losing their femininity…"

Nabiki laughed. "Proper? So what? Girls can only be one thing?"

Nodoka shook her head. "No. Not that at all."

"Can't be too careful," Nabiki clarified. "I get enough flack as it is. Being a businesswoman isn't bad, but boy, mothers seem to be pissed at me. *sigh* I would have a much better time being a boy, really."

Akane came in right then. "Good morning."

"Good morning, little sister." Kasumi smiled and finished bringing out the food. "Would you mind getting Ranma?"

"Sure." Akane walked to the dojo.

"You can do whatever you want to Akane, though." Nabiki smirked. "Her cooking REALLY needs improving."

"Nabiki!" Kasumi frowned.

Nabiki shrugged.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Ranma walked on the fence next to Akane and Nabiki as they made their way to school. The pigtailed girl didn't even look like a girl, however.

"Why do you do that?" Akane asked, curious.

Ranma shrugged. "I feel more confident higher up."

"Being short and all," Nabiki finished.

Ranma glared at her, which only met a smirk.

Akane changed subjects. "Anyway… I'm glad you're coming to school with us, but… why as a boy?"

The girl on the fence sighed. "I'm not even comfortable being a girl outside of you guys. Besides, I do NOT want to be on Kuno's list of cute girls."

Akane growled. "Stupid Kuno. Still, he's after me, so I doubt you'll have problems."

Nabiki laughed. "Oh, sis! That's hilarious!"

"What?" Akane asked. "Why?"

"Last year, Kuno-baby had his eyes set on all the martial arts girls at school. It was like he was trying to get his own personal harem," Nabiki chuckled. "It was so bad, they all left and transferred to girls-only schools. It's why you're the only martial arts chick in school."

Ranma whistled. "Wow."

Akane shivered. "That pervert…"

"Mm hmmm…" Nabiki nodded. "And with Ranma's personality, it'd take only a day until she beat up a guy going after her."

"Hey!" Ranma protested.

Nabiki shrugged. "It's true."

Akane huffed. "How would you know?"

Nabiki rolled her eyes. "Remember the last transfer girl?"

"You mean last week?" Akane verified.

"Yep. Remember how she was sexually molested all day until you saw it?" Nabiki smirked.

Akane grit her teeth. "Oh, **I** remember!"

"It was only because she was so nervous and submissive looking," Nabiki clarified. "The boys had a field day with a temptation like that."

Ranma steamed. "I wouldn't be like THAT!"

Nabiki rolled her eyes. "No, you would be shaking and looking around so much that once a guy tried to talk to you, you would send him through the roof. THAT'S when Kuno would pounce on you. The guy's a masochist and an Amazon chaser."

Ranma nearly lost her breakfast. "That's SICK!"

"I'll say!" Akane growled.

Nabiki looked ahead. "Well, we're early; that's good for you, Ranma. I'll show you where to sign up. Akane, you'd better let off your steam and go pay a certain someone a visit."

Ranma raised an eyebrow while Akane fidgeted.

"I… Uh… I'll see you two later!" Akane started walking towards a certain clinic…

"What was THAT all about?" Ranma wondered aloud.

Nabiki smirked. "I'll tell you for 9,000 yen."

"…" Ranma sweatdropped. "No thanks, I'll figure it out myself."

Nabiki shrugged. "Suit yourself."

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

"Everything seems to be in order…" the administrator person told Ranma. "Although… living with the Tendos?"

Ranma nodded, bored. "Pops is friends with Mr. Tendo. My mom and I are staying there for now."

"I see." The administrator person shrugged. "Oh well. Here's your homeroom number. Any questions?"

"Yeah, where's the principal?" Ranma scratched her head.

The administrator person laughed. "Hell if I know. It's a good thing he's gone, though. That menace is insane. No one has seen him in three years."

Ranma found this a bit suspicious but she didn't really care. "Alright, then. Thank you."

"No problem at all, Mr. Saotome." The person smiled. "There is something… off… though…"

Ranma nearly flinched. 'Can he see through me?!'

The administrator person rubbed his chin. "Aren't you a little short for a high schooler?"

Ranma facefaulted. "WHAT?!"

"Sorry, sorry! I just thought maybe you were one of those young super genius kids. That's all!" The person sweated. "I mean, you do look a bit young and, well, some kids do skip grades and all. Not as much as in America, but still…"

Ranma's head veins popped, crisscrossed. "I am sixteen years old!"

"Shutting up now." The person tried to hide as Ranma was very intimidating.

Ranma growled and stormed off.

The person sighed in relief. 'Must have a Napoleon complex….'

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Ranma reached the classroom easily enough. Students were starting to get to class and didn't bother her at all.

Walking into the classroom, Ranma immediately noticed Ukyo, who was talking to the teacher.

'Ucchan and I are in the same class?' Ranma resisted a laugh. 'Awesome.'

The pigtailed girl looked around the room and noticed that, strangely, nearly everyone was by the windows, staring down into the courtyard.

'Wonder what they're looking at…' Ranma thought as she walked over to an open window.

What she saw made her eyes widen.

Akane was beating up boys left and right, many in various types of sports equipment.

'Guess she's not too bad, after all…' Ranma thought to herself before turning away and walking over to the teacher.

"Yes, I'm serious. Owning your own restaurant at your age is amazing," the teacher complimented Ukyo. "Young men like you are very rare these days, Mr. Kuonji."

Ranma nearly snickered while Ukyo smiled.

"I just stick with what I do best, that's all…" Ukyo shrugged. "But that means you don't mind me selling my okonomiyaki at lunch, then?"

The teacher smiled. "I don't care and neither will any of the other teachers. Besides, you don't look like someone I'd want to cross, so… do your thing."

"Good enough for me." Ukyo bowed and looked to Ranma with a smirk.

The teacher looked over at Ranma. "I haven't seen you before…"

The pigtailed girl shrugged. "I'm new here. Starting today."

"Oh, the OTHER transfer student." The teacher checked his papers. "Mr. Saotome, I presume?"

"Yep," Ranma answered.

The teacher tapped his lips. "I THINK I know where to put you… Though I'm a bit nervous due to…"

"LOOK OUT!" a girl screamed as she ran from the windows.

*CRASH* A tall boy flew through a window of the classroom, sending students ducking for cover as he crashed into the desks.

The teacher sweatdropped as the boy picked himself up, looking unharmed.

"Such fierceness today…" he said in awe. "The Blue Thunder hasn't seen her this ferocious in a long while."

"'Blue Thunder'?" a boy asked.

"I thought he called himself Shooting Star?" a girl wondered aloud.

Ranma and Ukyo blinked and stared at the intruder.

The teacher sighed. "Mr. Kuno, please leave this classroom…"

Kuno did so, talking all the way. "Why, of course, for the Fierce Tigress still has my sword. I need to retrieve it at once and prepare for our date!"

"…" Ranma sweatdropped. "What. The. Hell?"

"You got me." Ukyo scratched her head.

The teacher sighed. "That's Kuno. He's captain of the kendo team, but is annoying to many, many people."

"And the biggest pervert in school!" a boy added from under a table.

The other classmates nodded in agreement.

Ranma raised an eyebrow. "So, he just flies through windows, then?"

"Not usually," a girl clarified. "Akane must have sent him flying."

Ranma raised another eyebrow.

"Yes, Akane is who you'll be sitting next to," the teacher sighed. "We've been trying to keep that seat empty because, well…"

"She hates boys!" a boy interrupted.

The teacher narrowed his eyes. "Don't…"

"I heard she's a lesbian!" a girl spoke up.

Others agreed.

"Hey! That's not nice!" a different girl objected, getting to her feet. "Stop making fun of Akane!"

"You tell 'em, Yuka!" another girl shouted.

"But it's true! Right?" a boy whined.

"CLASS!" the teacher scolded. "Behave!"

Ukyo sweatdropped while cogs were turning inside Ranma's head.

The class mostly quieted down, filling the classroom with mumbles.

The teacher let out a breath. "Anyway, class starts in two minutes. You will introduce yourself after Mr. Kuonji here and sit next to him and Akane."

Ranma struggled not to smile widely as she asked, "So… how would I know her?"

That's when the door opened to reveal Akane, looking calm and pristine.

The youngest Tendo had everyone's eyes on her.

"…" Akane blinked. "What?"

Everyone else was silent for a moment.

Akane looked around the room, confused.

The teacher coughed into his hand. "Good morning, Akane. Now, everyone take their seats. Class is about to begin-"

*RIIING*

"… Now," he finished.

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Ukyo fired up her portable grill and made an okonomiyaki as she introduced herself.

"The name's Ukyo Kuonji. I own my own restaurant, Okonomiyaki Ucchan's. I'm the best okonomiyaki chef in the world!" Ukyo boasted as she flipped the finished food to the teacher, who took a bite out of it.

"Wow… impressive," the teacher praised.

Ukyo turned off the grill and sat down at her seat, getting some looks from a few girls.

"And this is our other new student," the teacher announced.

"Ranma Saotome." Ranma smirked. "Just came back from China on a trip."

A few oohs were heard from the class.

"Anything else?" the teacher asked.

Ranma shrugged. "I'm a martial artist. That's… all I can think of, at any rate…"

A few ahs came from the class.

"Is it because you're so short?" a random boy asked with a snicker.

Ranma glared at him. "Say that again. I dare you."

The teacher intervened. "Now, now, don't fight in class, please. Take your seat, Mr. Saotome."

Ranma did as she was told and sat between Akane and Ukyo.

Class started rather boringly.

It wasn't long until a note hit Ukyo in the back of the head.

After looking to see who threw it and finding nothing, Ukyo opened it.

'"Are you single?"' Ukyo facepalmed. 'Great, just great. All I needed.'

She pocketed the note and continued paying attention.

As the class dragged on, Ukyo got more notes from girls wanting to date her.

Ranma, meanwhile, minded her own business and ignored what went around her.

Akane's eye was twitching due to many notes asking her when she would do something against Ranma once a perverted situation occurred.

The tenseness was finally relived once the teachers switched.

Akane stood up and glared at the people behind her. "Stop sending me notes! It's annoying!"

Ukyo silently agreed with her.

Ranma just had her hands behind her head, bored.

A boy walked up to Ranma's desk, a smirk on his face.

"Hey, shorty," he mocked. "Think you're too good for a school uniform?"

Most people in the room cringed. The boy was a giant in Japanese terms; a sumo wrestler, to be precise. Most considered him smart enough not to fight Akane daily (or he didn't think she was worth the attention).

Ukyo and Akane, however, struggled not to laugh.

"Depends," Ranma said, still with a bored expression. "Does being too good mean being stronger than everyone else? If so, then yes."

The big fat guy chuckled. "Big mouth for someone so puny."

Ranma raised an eyebrow. "How long is it until the next teacher comes?"

"Two more minutes," Akane answered, trying to make it sound offhand.

"Way too much time," Ranma sighed.

The fat guy cracked his knuckles. "Yeah, too much time for me to kick your a-"

He was cut off by a punch to the stomach.

As the fat guy fell to the floor, Ranma looked down at him and shook her head. "Just shut up."

The fat guy struggled to his feet. "Lucky shot, but if you think I'll let you get away-"

Ranma threw him towards the back of the room where he hit the wall with a thump and fell unconscious.

"Not worth my time," Ranma said casually as she put her hands back behind her head and looked bored once more.

The other classmates looked back and forth, many seeing if the boy was alright.

"Whoa…" a boy whistled. "Well, that's another person on my 'not to mess with' list."

Others agreed, more or less.

Seeing that they were alone-ish for a second, Ranma quickly whispered to Akane. "Meet on the roof."

Akane raised an eyebrow, but nodded.

Ranma turned to Ukyo. "Meet me on the roof."

Ukyo agreed.

That's when the next teacher came in.

"Hey! Get back to your seats!" she yelled.

Ranma smiled.

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Lunch finally came, not a moment too soon for Ranma.

On the roof, three girls came together.

"Alright…" Ranma looked at Akane and Ukyo. "Ukyo, Akane; Akane, Ukyo. I'm staying at Akane's house at the moment."

Ukyo and Akane looked at each other and bowed.

"Alright, good thing we got that out of the way," Ranma sighed.

Akane tilted her head. "Ukyo… Ukyo… That name sounds familiar…"

Ranma blinked. "As I was saying, you should know something…"

Akane snapped her fingers. "I remember! Didn't you have a crush on- OOP!"

The blue-haired girl covered her mouth with embarrassment.

Ranma sweatdropped. "I… err… um…"

Ukyo laughed. "I thought so, Ran-chan. It makes way too much sense…"

"Sorry about that…" Akane apologized.

Ranma sighed. "Well, the funny thing about that is-"

That's when it started raining.

A now feline Ranma wriggled out of her clothes. "Nyan!"

Ukyo's eyes widened to an insane degree.

Akane facepalmed. "Yes, the thing is that Ranma turns into a cat."

"How?" Ukyo stared in disbelief.

Akane sighed. "I'll explain after we get hot water…"

Ranma put all her now wet clothes in her bag and went inside, followed by the two girls.

With a bit of sneakiness, the trio got into a storage closet as Akane explained.

"I don't remember the details exactly, but Ranma got a curse in China that turns her into a cat with cold water. Hot water reverses it," Akane said with a sigh. "Now, uh, turn around. I have to change Ranma back."

Ukyo smirked and did so. "Sure, why not?"

"Aw, man… Now I got coffee all over myself," Ranma groaned.

"Hey, it was the closest hot water I could find," Akane explained. "Now, we need to get you new clothes…"

Ranma looked around. "Would you look at that? School uniforms. Hey, Ucchan, maybe you can get some for this school too."

Ukyo turned around to see Ranma's backside as she looked through school uniforms.

Akane flipped out. "What are you doing?! Stop it!"

Ukyo smirked and responded by taking off her shirt, revealing her bound breasts. "Stop what, sugar? We're all girls here."

Akane's eye twitched as Ukyo winked at her.

"So, what size are you, Ucchan?" Ranma asked as they dug through the school uniforms.

Akane facepalmed. "HONESTLY!"

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"Two orders of pork, three shrimp, got it." Ukyo took orders from her new customers in the classroom, where there were many more people than normal due to the rain.

Akane, meanwhile, was chatting with her friends, trying to explain what was going on.

"I said I won't tell anyone, Akane. Give me more credit than that." Yuka rolled her eyes.

Sayuri agreed. "We're not gossip queens."

"Like your sister," Yuka added.

Akane sighed. "Nabiki is not… Fine… Do NOT tell anyone, though."

The blue-haired girl looked left, right, under the desks and up at the ceiling before whispering into her friends' ears.

"…" Both of them had their eyes go wide.

"You don't mean…" Yuka started.

Akane nodded.

"B- but that's…" Sayuri stuttered.

Akane glared.

Yuka and Sayuri looked at each other.

Ranma walked by with okonomiyaki in her mouth.

Yuka looked at Ranma as if trying to see it. "But that… it… he… she…"

Akane nodded. "Raised like that. Great martial artist."

Sayuri looked down. "So… are you really a lesbian then?"

Akane had crisscross veins popping on her head. "Sayuri…"

"Sorry, sorry!" Sayuri waved her arms. "It's just that… well… you only get along with girls and you hate boys, so…"

Akane sighed. "Just because there are no good boys here doesn't mean I'm a lesbian."

Yuka moaned. "I know what you mean. There are no decent guys here… Well, except…"

Akane held her head as Yuka looked dreamily at Ukyo. 'Let them have that one. At least until I get a reason WHY.'

Yuka hit the desk with her head as Ranma got another okonomiyaki. "Why? Why?"

As her friend sobbed, Sayuri tried to comfort her.

Akane facepalmed.

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"Well, this sucks," Ranma muttered as she looked out the door with rain still pouring.

Ukyo nodded. "You will NOT be able to stay dry going out there."

"Good luck," Akane said as she walked out the door with the umbrella.

Ranma and Ukyo stared out the door as people left, some without umbrellas.

That's when Kuno came through.

"Such rain, the heavens do cry out in sorrow for the Blue Thunder. While I am quite flattered, it is unnecessary, for Akane Tendo shall soon be mine," Kuno spewed.

Ranma rolled her eyes while Ukyo raised her eyebrow.

Kuno bumped into Ranma. "Hmm? I did not see you there, for thou art too short and not beautiful…"

Ranma grit her teeth. "THAT'S IT!"

Grabbing his shoulders, Ranma pulled him to her level. "STOP IT WITH THE SHORT JOKES!"

People started to gather around as they saw some short guy mess with Kuno.

Nabiki walked to them and grabbed Kuno. "Come on, Kuno-baby. I need you…"

Kuno was going to protest when Nabiki flashed a photo of Akane that had been promised to him. "Short one, I shall deal with thee on the morrow."

Ranma fumed as Nabiki dragged Kuno away.

"Whoa, who is she?" Ukyo asked.

With a roar, Ranma punched a locker, her hand going straight through it. "Stupid Kuno, stupid short, I'll show HIM!"

That out of the way, Ranma opened the doors and ran as fast as she could.

"…" Ukyo shook her head. "Crazy…"

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When Ukyo got to her restaurant, she saw Ranma, as a cat with a knapsack on, sitting by the door out of the rain.

Ukyo smiled. "Well, hello there."

"Nyan…" Ranma responded.

"Yes, yes, I know. I'm getting the door opened and you can stay here until the weather calms down." Ukyo raised an eyebrow. "So, why did you run off like that? I could have sworn you had an umbrella."

"Nyanya…" Ranma jumped onto Ukyo's head.

"Hey! You're still wet!" Ukyo complained.

Ranma purred in response.

With a sigh, Ukyo opened her restaurant and walked in, Ranma on her head.

"I'll warm up some water," Ukyo told Ranma. "Now GET OFF MY HEAD!"

Ranma did so, taking a seat at the grill.

Ukyo nearly laughed at the scene and soon got to work.

As a cat, Ranma got bored quickly and took a nap like the cat she was.

The chef didn't mind as she looked at the sleeping Ranma. 'She looks so cute. So… huggable… I wonder what being a cat is like?'

Ranma only woke when she heard the kettle go off.

"Nya!" Ranma leapt up.

"Yes, yes, get over here." Ukyo pointed to behind the grill.

Ranma did so and was promptly turned back. "Thanks, Ucchan."

"No problem." Ukyo smiled. "Ran-chan, what is it like being a cat?"

Ranma got dressed on the floor. "A bit weird. Hard to describe."

Ukyo sighed. "Well, I have a restaurant to open… Look, the sun is out."

"Yes, it is…" Ranma stood and then suddenly glomped Ukyo. "It's nice getting my buddy back… See you tomorrow, Ucchan!"

Ukyo nodded her head. "See ya."

With that, Ranma left for her temporary home.

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**Author's notes: **yes, an update! It's insane! YAY! More to come eventually! Things get better, I know it, cuz I'm the TEXT! Hero in a cup wins! Yay! It was Ukyo!


	6. IIII I

Ranma-chan, the Cat

~Noy Telinú~

**Warning:** this is the story of a girl, who turns into a catgirl, but not the kind that you think, but the… other ki-i-ind! The other ki-i-i-ind!

**Caution:** hugging cats can be bad for your health, believe me, I'm the Text.

You have been warned….

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_**IIII I**_: Complications complicate

"Hey there, Ran-chan," Ukyo greeted as she joined Ranma and Akane on their way to school as they passed by her restaurant.

"Hi, Ucchan." Ranma smiled brightly. "So… how's the food business?"

Ukyo shrugged. "Not too bad, not too bad. Hey, Akane, why so glum?"

Akane looked up. "Oh, it's nothing… Just be careful, Ranma."

Ranma had her hands behind her head. "Don't you worry, this'll be easy."

"No, you don't understand…" Akane fidgeted. "Kuno… He's… he can be… tough…"

"Hey, I'm the best. Don't worry!" Ranma laughed.

Ukyo nodded. "I wouldn't worry, Akane. Ran-chan won't have a problem. Unless it rains, of course..."

Just as she said that, it started raining.

Ranma pulled out an umbrella from her knapsack just in time to avoid changing into a cat.

"That was close…" Ranma sighed in relief. "Hey, what are you two doing?!"

What Akane and Ukyo were doing was huddling with Ranma uncomfortably under the umbrella.

"Hey, I don't want to get wet," Akane mumbled.

"Me too, Ran-chan," Ukyo agreed.

"Well, **I** NEED it," Ranma argued. "If I get splashed now…"

"Hey, Ran-chan, why didn't you use one yesterday?" Ukyo asked.

Ranma sighed. "I had one. It's just… It wouldn't help too much yesterday…"

"That doesn't make any sense." Akane raised an eyebrow.

"Hey, do YOU want to drag home an umbrella as a cat?" Ranma growled. "It's not fun…"

"Hey sugar, how is it that _you_ don't have an umbrella with you?" Ukyo asked of Akane. "I mean, you LIVE in Tokyo! Ran-chan and I at least just moved here…"

"Can't a girl just forget?" Akane mumbled. "Honestly!"

Ranma groaned as she saw her destination.

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Tatewaki Kuno stood bravely in the rain. He was standing like a statue, sword thrust out, soaked, and not minding one bit.

'Pathetic. Most here are heading indoors. Yet a true warrior, one worthy of Akane Tendo, would stay out here!' Kuno thought to himself angrily. 'Hmm? What's this? The fierce tigress Akane Tendo walking under an umbrella with two boys? I WILL NOT ALLOW IT! And that SHORT ONE! HE WILL PAY!'

Lightning struck across the sky, illuminating his features.

Akane looked left and right as the umbrella trio made it into the courtyard of school. "Huh, would you look at that. No boys… Well, I'm heading in then. Good luck with Kuno."

"Yeah, yeah…" Ranma sighed.

Akane made a wide berth around Kuno just to be safe.

"You'll do fine, Ran-chan…" Ukyo reassured her friend before dashing into the school.

Ranma took a deep breath and marched towards Kuno.

"SHORT ONE! YOU WILL PAY DEARLY!" Kuno yelled as he gripped his bokken tighter. "TO DARE SHARE AN UMBRELLA WITH AKANE TENDO! YOU'RE DISPICABLE!"

"KUNO!" Ranma sneered. "SHUT UP AND FIGHT ME!"

"THAT! I! SHALL!" Kuno pronounced right before leaping at Ranma.

The pigtailed girl was honestly surprised at Kuno's speed.

She still dodged it, however.

The wall behind her, on the other hand, wasn't so lucky, as Kuno stabbed it with his bokken. Somehow, despite being wooden, the sword went through the wall easily.

'Where did he go!?' Kuno questioned internally before pulling his bokken out of the wall. 'That… COWARD!'

"Hey, behind ya!" Ranma announced arrogantly.

It was a good enough warning for Kuno as he attacked immediately.

The fast uppercutting action missed Ranma, who was now across the courtyard.

Kuno smirked. "What, the short one is afraid to get wet?"

Veins popped on Ranma's head, but she stayed quiet.

"I see…" Kuno leveled his bokken. "Prepare to get wet! STRIKESTRIKESTRIKESTRIKE-STRIKE!"

Kuno then struck out with his bokken again and again in quick succession.

A wave of air pressure came towards Ranma, surprising her.

'Oh, SHOOT!' Ranma's thoughts went wild as she saw water dripping in front of her face.

Her umbrella now full of holes, Ranma decided to end it fast.

Kuno's eyes widened as Ranma disappeared.

*WHAM* Ranma's heel hit Kuno in the back of his head, bringing him down.

*SPLUURT* The tip of Ranma's holey umbrella hit Kuno under his chin, rendering him unconscious.

Ranma, now underneath Kuno, sighed in relief as she used his prone body as a shield against the rain and made it inside, still human.

"Hehe…" Ranma threw the umbrella along with Kuno to the ground. "Made it."

*SPLASH*

A tiny red cat nyaned in annoyance at being hit with a bucket of water that fell from atop a nearby shoe locker.

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Ranma sighed as she held buckets of water in the hallway outside of class. 'Stupid Kuno…'

The silence in the hall bored Ranma easily.

After a while she put the buckets down, not because they were heavy but because she was bored…

Ranma glared at the water.

… Or it could simply have been that getting splashed would be a very bad idea.

'Stupid bucket…' Ranma balled her left fist. "I was so close! ARRG! This day can't get any worse."

Unfortunately, Ranma, due to living on the road all her life, didn't watch nearly enough TV to know to not say that.

"SHORT ONE!" Kuno's yell echoed through the hall.

Ranma's veins popped on her head. "Kuno…"

Suddenly, the windows to the class popped open and about a dozen students yelled and chanted for a fight. Others gushed in remembrance of the last fight that took place half an hour earlier.

"Kuno, let me get this through your giant head…" Ranma sneered. "My name is Ranma Saotome. If you make ONE more jab about my height, I WILL beat you to a PULP!"

"OOoOoOOoOo…" the students chorused.

A boy rolled his eyes. "Jeez, Napoleon complex much?"

*KICK* went the bucket, hitting the boy in he head.

"YOU dare threaten ME?!" Kuno laughed.

Ranma growled. "Hey, I just kicked your sorry ass less than an hour ago!"

Kuno laughed harder. "Such ego to dream up something as inconceivable as that…"

"HEY! NO FIGHTING IN THE HALL!" the teacher yelled.

"You heard the man. Get lost, moron." Ranma pointed her thumb towards the window.

"You WILL address me as UPERCLASSMAN!" Kuno demanded, pointing his bokken at Ranma.

"Hell no!" Ranma pushed Kuno's bokken away. "Point that thing at someone else. And carrying around a wooden katana? Are YOU overcompensating for something?"

Silence echoed in the hall… somehow…

"Whoa…" a boy who was not wet with water whistled. "Damn, no one ever insulted Kuno's pe-"

"**SILENCE!**" Kuno cut him off before glaring at Ranma. "YOU… SHALL… DIE!"

"Bring it on…" Ranma smirked.

"NOT IN THE HALL!" the teacher yelled again.

Ranma used that distraction to kick the other bucket, causing it to hit Kuno in the head. "NYEH!"

With a pull down of the eyelid, Ranma ran down the hall laughing.

"RANMA SAOTOME!" Kuno screamed as he chased the short girl down. "YOU WILL MEET YOUR **DOOM**!"

The windows shattered, causing the rain to pour into the building.

Ukyo smiled as she walked out of class. "This'll be fun…."

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Ranma skidded to a stop right by the front door. 'Shoot, it's still raining…'

"**SAOTOME!**" Kuno rounded the last corner and saw Ranma, his fury more furious than before.

'Uh oh…' Ranma was trapped and she knew it.

*Crack-k-k-k* went Ranma's knuckles.

'But I like a challenge…' Ranma smirked. "Come and get me!"

Kuno needed no one to tell him to do so, as he was already halfway to Ranma as she said that.

'Right about…' Ranma held her position.

"DIE!" Kuno lashed out with his wooden katana, aiming for Ranma's head.

"NOW!" Ranma shouted to herself and attacked.

Akane and Ukyo, who were the fastest of the students who weren't fighting at the moment, made it just in time to see Ranma sweep her foot up…

*CRASH!*

… And see Kuno fall down, out of commission.

Akane blinked in surprise. "That… that was…"

Ranma scratched her head. "Didn't expect THAT…"

The pigtailed girl's jaw dropped.

Ukyo looked past them and shook her head. "The rain, it stopped."

"Typical," Akane murmured.

"Hey! Kuno's out!" a boy shouted as he came to the scene.

"Holy cow! He is!" another gasped in amazement.

Silence swept over the crowd, causing Ranma to rub the back of her head nervously.

"Let's draw on him!" the crowd shouted with glee as they swarmed the downed kendoist.

Akane, Ukyo, and Ranma sweatdropped in unison.

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It was lunch time at Furinkan. With the weather outside being unpredictable, the students were eating inside.

"Comwe onw, Akawne…" Ranma swallowed her food. "Try it! Ucchan's okonomiyaki is the best!"

Akane sighed. "It's not that I don't trust you, but then I'd have more food than I could eat for lunch…"

Ranma tilted her head sideways a bit. "Huh?"

Akane sweatdopped.

"Hey Akane," Yuka greeted and turned to Ranma. "Hello there, my name is Yuka. Pleased to meet you!"

Sayuri nearly giggled. "Hi! I'm Sayuri!"

Ranma smiled. "Why, hello there. Ranma Saotome at your service. Could I interest either of you ladies some okonomiyaki? It's made by the best okonomiyaki chef ever!"

Akane blinked in surprise.

"From Ukyo Kuonji?" Yuka gushed. "I'd… I'd be honored!"

"Alright." Ranma smiled and walked over to Ukyo. "Hey Ucchan… more, please!"

Once Ranma was out of sight, Yuka cried. "Wha! She even calls him Ucchan! I'll never have a chance now!"

"There, there." Sayuri hugged Yuka. "Akane, I still can't believe that Ranma is…"

Akane sighed. "Yeah, I know… But trust me, I looked."

A lightbulb went on over Yuka's head. 'That's it! If I can get Ranma to go out with Akane…'

"Here you go, Yuka. Enjoy!" Ranma smiled brightly as she reached the girls and handed Yuka the food.

Yuka took it eagerly. "Thank you…"

Ranma raised an eyebrow as Yuka stood there, mouth opening and closing, as if she were trying to say something. 'Ack! I'm too embarrassed! Ranma looks… Come on, he's hot! She, SHE! Stupid hormones!'

"Alright…" Ranma looked over to Sayuri, readjusting her focus. "You want anything?"

Sayuri shook her head. "No, I'm good…"

Ranma shrugged. "Suit yourself."

"Last call!" Ukyo shouted.

Ranma smiled and zoomed off.

"Akane, could we… um, get together at your place?" Yuka asked, trying not to look directly at her friend.

"Huh? Sure." Akane nodded. "When?"

"Um… Today?" Yuka laughed nervously.

"That's fine by me," Akane answered.

Sayuri bit her lip. "Yuka, are you alright?"

"I'm fine! Fine…" Yuka lied. "You are coming, right?"

Sayuri nodded enthusiastically.

"And… Akane…" Yuka twilled her thumbs. "Could Ranma be there too?"

Akane looked around the room and then whispered into her friends' ears.

"WHAT?!" Sayuri exclaimed.

The room seemed to look at her.

"Um…" Sayuri pointed out the window. "Rain…"

Luckily for Sayuri, it was raining again.

People shrugged and went back to their business: lunch.

'This is perfect!' Yuka thought. 'With Ranma living at Akane's place, it'll be easier to hook them up!'

"Hello there, Akane…" Ukyo greeted as she walked up to the group. "So, who're your friends?"

Yuka's eyes turned into stars. "I'm I… I'M YUKA! Ukyo Kuonji, thank you for the delicious food!"

Ukyo sweatdropped as Yuka bowed dramatically.

"My name is Sayuri," Sayuri answered. "Come on, Yuka, we need to do that thing… Yeah…"

Sayuri dragged Yuka away.

"Before you ask, I have NO idea what's going on." Akane rubbed her temples. "Honestly…."

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"Well, look what the cat dragged in," Nabiki commented as Kuno slowly walked into his classroom for lunch, body bandaged heavily.

"Shut thy face, Nabiki Tendo…" Kuno spouted as he sat down.

Nabiki smirked. "Akane got you good then, eh?"

Kuno looked away.

"OR… was it Ranma-" Nabiki was cut off by Kuno.

"SILENCE!" Kuno yelled sternly. "That fiend…"

Nabiki looked bored. "Wanna know about Saotome, Kuno-baby?"

"…" Kuno inwardly groaned. "How much?"

Nabiki polished her fingernails. "10,000 all in advance."

"10,000!" Kuno sneered. "For that much I could…"

He trailed off, contemplating the decision.

Nabiki stuck out her hand.

The kendoist's face dropped and he pulled out the money. "This had better be worth it, Nabiki Tendo."

"Yeah, sure, whatever." Nabiki pocketed the money. "Ranma's living with us."

"**WHAT!?**" Kuno exploded. "WHAT DID YOU SAY?!"

The students in the class groaned and put on earplugs.

Nabiki rested her chin on her hand. "Ranma lives with us. Gets along pretty well with Akane…"

Kuno was getting redder and redder with anger after every word.

Nabiki smirked. "They even shared a bath together…"

"**AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!**" Kuno leapt from his seat and raced out of the classroom in a fury.

Nabiki shrugged and counted her money.

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*Riiiiiiinnng!* went the bell.

"Alright, class, get in your seats…" the teacher ordered. "Now, would-"

Suddenly, a pissed off Kuno tore the door open. "**AHHHHHHHHHH!**"

The students covered their ears.

Ranma's eyes widened as Kuno made a beeline for her, still screaming in rage.

*WHAMO* Kuno was hit on the back of the head and fell down to the ground unconscious.

Everyone who was awake looked to see Ukyo holding her giant spatula.

"What? He's been annoying me since I got here! Crazy jackass!" Ukyo hit Kuno again for emphasis.

Soon, everyone joined in except the teacher, who pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration.

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Nodoka took a sip of her tea as she sat at the table with Kasumi. "Thank you, Kasumi."

"You are welcome." Kasumi smiled and took a sip of her own tea. "The girls should be coming home soon."

Nodoka nodded. "Our time of peace will end then."

Kasumi giggled. "Oh well…"

Nodoka smiled despite herself, but it soon turned into a frown. "Kasumi… I am worried about my daughter…"

"Oh my." Kasumi had a hand to her mouth. "Why do you think so? Surely she could beat up any… unruly… aggressive… um… boys… who want to… do that thing… with her against her will…"

Nodoka shook her head as Kasumi blushed fiercely. "No… not that. I have no worries of Ranma defending herself. I worry about her future though. Not to mention the damage my husband inflicted upon her."

"Oh, I see." Kasumi took another sip of her tea. "How good it is to have a mother who cares for her daughter…"

Nodoka turned towards Kasumi. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"No. No, I am fine," Kasumi reassured Nodoka and looked upwards. "While I miss my mother, I have moved on. I am at peace with it."

Nodoka looked at her tea. "I see…"

Kasumi turned towards Nodoka. "What is it about Ranma's future that scares you?"

Nodoka sighed. "She's being very… tomboyish…"

"Oh…" Kasumi nodded in understanding. "I wouldn't worry too much, but I see what you mean. With the way Akane acts, it feels like I have a brother at times. But it has gotten less so ever since she developed a crush with an older man…"

Nodoka raised an eyebrow. "Interesting…"

Kasumi giggled. "Falling in love has gotten her to try to be more feminine. Love seems to do that."

"Hmmm…" Nodoka rubbed her chin in thought. "Indeed…"

"Hi! We're home!" Akane called out as she entered the house. "And I brought friends from school!"

Kasumi smiled and went to meet them.

"Interesting." Nodoka finished her tea. "Very interesting…."

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Meanwhile, at Okonomiyaki Ucchan's…

"So… do you want to eat before or after you change back?" Ukyo asked her cat friend, who was currently behind the counter.

"Nya…" Ranma, who was currently a cute red cat, shook her head.

"Then I'll make yours later." Ukyo stretched. "Now, excuse me, but I have money to make."

"Nyan nya nyaaa!" Ranma spoke up.

"Really?" Ukyo raised an eyebrow. "Well, I really need someone to attract customers…"

The cat that was Ranma gagged.

"Yeah, I thought so," Ukyo sighed. "Maybe Akane can do it…"

Ranma started pacing. "Nya… nyan nya nyaa…"

"Worried you'll be recognized?" Ukyo rubbed her chin. "That IS a problem, I'll admit…"

"Nyan nya… nYAnn…" Ranma looked away.

"That COULD work…" Ukyo mused. "Are you sure you want to?"

"Nyan nyaaa…" Ranma twiddled her paws.

Ukyo sighed. "I can't argue with that…"

Ukyo picked up the kettle from the stove.

"Alright, it's good enough. I think." Ukyo frowned. "Go on, I'm wasting time!"

Ranma took the kettle in her mouth and ran up the stairs.

Ukyo shook her head and flipped the sign to 'open.'

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Ranma frowned in front of her best friend's bathroom mirror in the apartment above Ukyo's restaurant. Ranma's hair was magically green. 'I don't know, I still recognize it as me.'

Pulling out another colored comb from her bag, Ranma tried again.

'Well, red is my real hair color anyway… Sort of,' Ranma mused.

Sighing, Ranma changed her hair color back to black. "Maybe if I wore a costume?"

With a shrug, she went back down to the restaurant.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

"Here's your double pork." Ukyo smiled and gave the customer his food.

"Thanks." The customer paid for the food. "So, I just go out and take a left?"

Ukyo nodded. "And you'll hit it."

The customer took a deep breath and left the restaurant.

Literally right after that, Ranma came down the stairs. "I'm ready for food!"

"Thought so." Ukyo shook her head. "So, what took you so long?"

Ranma rubbed the back of her head, embarrassed. "Just seeing if I could recognize myself with different hair… And yeah, I can…"

"Uh huh…" Ukyo flipped the okonomiyaki.

"It's true!" Ranma looked around. "Where are the customers?"

"I've had three so far, but they didn't stay to eat." Ukyo shrugged. "You have got to show me what green or purple hair looks like…"

"Well…" Ranma pulled her pigtail. "I'll do it later, when you aren't busy."

Ukyo smirked. "Good enough. Now here, eat."

"Thank you!" Ranma grinned and dug in.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

"Here we are, Saotome!" Soun nearly wept. "Across this sea, we will finally get what we need!"

[Hurry up and get in the boat!] Genma threw the sign at Soun, who was standing on the dock while Genma was on the boat already.

"Oh, right…" Soun laughed nervously and jumped on board.

[Still better than swimming across.] Genma pulled out a sign.

"I agree, Saotome…" Soun sighed. "I remember… far too well…"

"Grufff gurf," Genma sputtered out in disgust.

Soun shivered. "That was the worst part. To put it into writing would be unbearable…"

[I'll say.] Genma flopped on his side. [It's a good thing that you can understand me.]

"Yes. Yes, it is." Soun nodded slowly. "But let's not talk about… that… thing…"

[Agreed.] Genma nodded.

The boat then left the dock, headed for China.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

In Akane's room, three girls talk.

"So Ranma sleeps with… her… mother down the hall?" Yuka asked.

Akane nodded. "Yep."

Sayuri looked around, trying not to make eye contact with Akane. "With Ranma and her mom living here… and Nabiki going to school too… do you have to share baths?"

"It helps…" Akane shrugged. "So, why did you want to come over?"

"Sleepover!" Yuka blurted. 'So that I can make you and Ranma kiss…'

Akane blinked. "Huh… Well, that actually sounds like a good idea…"

"What do you mean by that?" Yuka whined.

Sayuri patted Yuka on the head. "There, there…"

"Ranma…" Akane sighed, "hasn't had much of a chance to be a girl. You know, with going to school as a boy and all…"

"Abut that…" Sayuri scratched her head. "WHY does she do that, anyway?"

Akane sighed. "It's complicated."

*Knock knock*

"Hey Akane, Kasumi wants to know if Yuka and Sayuri are staying over," Nabiki informed from the other side of the door. "And you have a love letter from Kuno."

Akane groaned.

"Yes, we're staying!" Yuka answered.

Akane walked over to the door and opened it.

"A hundred yen and I'll dispose of it." Nabiki smirked.

"If I pay you double, will you get him to leave me alone?" Akane asked, hopeful.

"100 thousand and yes." Nabiki crossed her arms.

Akane sighed. "That bad?"

Nabiki nodded.

"Maybe if you say you're a lesbian?" Sayuri suggested.

"Like that'll work." Nabiki rolled her eyes. "Now, if you SHOWED it, on the other hand…"

Akane's face grew red. "Nabiki!"

"Just a suggestion." Her sister shrugged. "Maybe you can practice tonight at your sleepover?"

Sayuri and Yuka nodded enthusiastically in agreement.

Akane stuttered in embarrassment. "Nabiki… not like… Lesbian!"

Nabiki laughed and walked off. "Don't knock it 'til you try it…"

Akane slammed the door. "Honestly!"

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Ranma casually entered the Tendo property, hands behind her head.

"Hello! I'm here!" Ranma laughed to herself as she came in.

"Good evening, Ranma." Kasumi smiled.

"You too, Kasumi." Ranma replied.

Nodoka frowned slightly as Ranma saw her. "Daughter… we need to talk."

Ranma gulped. "Um… sure…"

Mother and daughter sat across from each other.

Ranma took in a deep breath. "So… what is this about?"

"Daughter, I am… concerned…" Nodoka stated.

Ranma raised an eyebrow. "About?"

"Your future…" Nodoka looked right into Ranma's eyes. "More specifically, your future as the young lady I hope for you to be."

Ranma shivered. "Uh… huh…"

"While I understand the restrictions that you face in school due to your father's… guidance… I am worried that you aren't getting the knowledge and necessities that a girl your age needs." Nodoka paused. "This is not your fault, but we do need to correct it."

Ranma bit her lip.

"Fortunately, you have all of us in this house to help." Nodoka closed her eyes. "Akane is having a sleepover with a couple of her friends in her room and they want you to join them."

Ranma sighed in relief. "Yeah, I can do that."

Nodoka smiled. "Thank you for your cooperation. Starting tonight, I want you to help with cooking for this house. Kasumi shouldn't do so by herself."

"That's… reasonable…" Ranma relaxed some.

"Daughter, what sorts of clothes do you have?" Nodoka asked.

Ranma started sweating nervously. "Well, um… not much… Road traveling and all, you know… But I do have a Chinese dress…"

Nodoka frowned. "Tomorrow, you and I will go shopping."

Ranma bowed her head. "Yes, Mom…"

"Good, now go upstairs and introduce yourself." Nodoka smiled.

Ranma nodded and climbed up the stairs.

The pigtailed girl was about to knock on Akane's door when she heard a familiar voice.

"Think about it, Akane," Sayuri tried to reason with her friend. "Kuno won't stop harassing you if he thinks he has a chance! If you go out with a guy, he'll just be beaten up. And then Kuno's ego will be boosted more… But if you show that you're a lesbian…"

Akane shook her head, face deep red.

Yuka sighed. "He can't compete with a girl, not to mention that thinking he was the cause of it would drive him crazy!"

Akane buried her face in her hands.

Sayuri shrugged. "Besides, we're having a sleepover. It's the perfect time to do it."

'Girls kiss each other at these things?' Ranma smiled. 'But wait… I'll have to explain that I'm a girl…'

Ranma pursed her lips.

Akane mumbled some words. "Can't you at least get me drunk first?"

"Great idea!" Yuka giggled. "Just be sure the room is secure first. You know that boys would try to spy on these things…"

"No, wait!" Akane spoke up, but was ignored. "I didn't…"

"Alright, I'll bring some sake when we come back with our sleeping clothes!" Sayuri declared. "See you soon!"

"No, STOP!" Akane called out.

Ranma's eyes widened and she zipped to the room she shared with her mom.

Yuka and Sayuri left Akane's room, smiling and giggling.

Soon, they left and were walking towards their homes.

Ranma left the guest room and walked back over to Akane's.

*Knock knock*

"Who's there?" Akane asked, quietly.

"A pigtailed girl," Ranma answered. 'Wow, Akane sounds sad…'

Akane managed to smile. "Come in."

Ranma opened the door and smirked. "Hey there, how ya doin'?"

Akane sighed. "Been better…"

Ranma nodded. "I see… Anyway, Mom said that there's gonna be a sleepover here?"

Akane's face got red. "Yeah…"

"Uh huh…" Ranma closed the door and put her hands behind her head. "She said that you wanted me to be here. But how am I going to explain that to your friends?"

Akane sighed. "They know you're a girl, Ranma."

"…" Ranma patted her body and looked at it the best she could. "Wow, they're good…"

Akane giggled. "No, no… I told them…"

Ranma's eyes widened. "**WHAT!?**"

"I had to!" Akane defended. "They were… saying things…"

"Like?" Ranma raised an eyebrow.

Akane sighed. "After you got your uniforms… well… they were asking if you were my boyfriend, or maybe Ukyo… And I tried to explain that it wasn't what it looked like…"

Ranma facepalmed. "Akane…"

"They don't know about Ukyo though…" Akane gripped the sides of her head. "They kept bugging me about getting a boyfriend and saying that I'm a lesbian."

Ranma blinked. "Well, are you?"

"NO!" Akane yelped, blushing.

'Darn.' Ranma shrugged. "Then you're not. Why do they think so anyway?"

Akane sighed. "I don't know. It could be because I don't find boys attractive or appealing…"

'Interesting…' Ranma raised an eyebrow. "I see…"

"It's just… I like maturity, you know?" Akane tried to explain. "Like… a man."

'Damn it!' Ranma frowned. "Oh, I see…"

Akane put her hands on her cheeks. "What am I going to do?"

"Um… find a man?" Ranma answered.

"But what if he likes someone else?" Akane asked sadly.

"Then, um… So, are you against lesbians or…?" Ranma scratched her head.

"I'm not a lesbian!" Akane denied. "Just… just because I haven't found a man to be with doesn't mean I'm a lesbian!"

"I didn't say you were." Ranma smirked.

Akane blushed. "Oh, shut up…"

Ranma couldn't help but laugh at that.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Yuka and Sayuri were doomed. After going home and coming back with sake, the two girls were now face to face with Kasumi Tendo.

"Um…" Yuka gulped. "I…"

Kasumi Tendo frowned.

"I… I…" Sayuri started crying.

"Oh my…" Kasumi shook her head. "Bringing alcohol in this house? How… disappointing…"

Sayuri and Yuka fell to the floor and did the only martial arts move of their life.

"WE'RE SORRY! WE'RE SORRY!" they chorused as the two unknowingly performed the Crouch of the Wild Tiger.

Somewhere on a boat on the way to China, Genma sneezed.

Kasumi took the sake and walked away.

"This is all your fault, Sayuri," Yuka mumbled.

Sayuri sniffled. "Those eyes… Those eyes…"

"Eh, you'll get over it," Nabiki commented. "Or is it the other way around and you never get over it?"

Sayuri trembled. "She's scary…"

"Whatever…" Nabiki took a potato chip and ate it. "Hey sis, lemme have that…"

"Nabiki's crazy," Yuka commented.

Sayuri nodded.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Sayuri and Yuka eventually got to Akane's room. That was when they noticed something odd.

"Um… Akane… why are the windows boarded up?" Yuka asked.

Akane sweatdropped. "You said to make sure that the room is secure…"

Yuka looked away. "Um… good job."

"Yeah, now… uh, we can get into our sleepwear!" Sayuri smiled.

"We didn't eat dinner yet," Akane deadpanned.

Sayuri blushed. "Oh yeah…"

*Knock knock*

Akane smirked knowingly and opened the door.

"Ladies…" Ranma smiled in a way that her teeth shined as she leaned against the frame casually.

Bishie sparkles seemed to surround her as her pigtail fluttered in the non-existing wind.

At least that's what it looked like to Yuka.

'SHE LOOKS EVEN MORE LIKE A GUY, DAMMIT!' Yuka thought, blushing madly.

"Dinner is ready." Ranma held out her hand. "Would any of you girls like an escort down the stairs?"

*Thud* Yuka fainted.

'Ha! Man, I'm good!' Ranma laughed internally. "I'll take care of her."

Sayuri's eye twitched.

Ranma took Yuka downstairs, carrying her fireman style.

"You're sure she's a she?" Sayuri asked Akane.

Akane burst out laughing.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Seven females sat around the table, eating dinner. Although it looked more like six females and one teenaged boy…

"Daughter, please sit like a lady," Nodoka requested of Ranma.

Ranma did so with great reluctance and discomfort. "But it feels funny…"

Nabiki rolled her eyes. "You know, it's a real taco fiesta in here…"

Giant question marks appeared over five of the other people, their looks all blank.

Ranma snorted, however.

"I don't get it…" Yuka mumbled.

Kasumi sighed, looking out at the darkening sky. "I wish I could go to a fiesta…"

THAT got everyone to look at her oddly.

Nodoka closed her eyes. "Anyway, this sleepover you girls are having… be sure to help my daughter out in learning what it means to be a girl. But most importantly, enjoy yourselves. I remember when I did such things…"

"I'll be sure of that, Auntie." Akane's face took on a look of determination. "Akane Tendo will not fail!"

Ranma sweatdropped.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Four sixteen-year-old girls were in Akane's bedroom. Three of them wore bedclothes.

Akane's were yellow with a full top and bottom, a bit big, with swirly designs.

Yuka wore a pink nightgown that was a bit revealing, since it didn't have a bottom.

And Sayuri had a black cat costume that was somehow sleepwear.

The last girl had on a white tanktop with yellow and blue boxer shorts.

"WOW!" Sayuri exclaimed. "How… how did you keep THOSE hidden?!"

Ranma shrugged, eyes closed. "I'm just that awesome."

"Uh huh…" Yuka raised an eyebrow. "Anyway… GAME TIME!"

Everyone got superdeformed chibi like and clapped. A faint, but enthusiastic yay was heard... from somewhere…

"First! Old maid!" Yuka shouted with glee as she went through her bag.

Ranma's face fell. 'Oh man!'

"That sounds like fun," Akane commented. "So, how exactly are we doing this?"

"STRIP Old Maid!" Sayuri blurted.

The other three girls turned to her.

A pause that was pregnant happened to happen.

"I'm up for that," Ranma broke the silence. 'Gotta stay focused.'

"Um, SURE!" Yuka seconded. 'Maybe being naked will get Akane and Ranma together… somehow…'

"Um…" Akane bit her lip. "S-s-sure…"

"So, two by two or is this a four-way?" Ranma asked, still not looking at Sayuri.

Yuka rubbed her chin. "Two by two…"

"Yuka and I!" Sayuri said quickly. "And Akane and Ranma."

'Yes! Sayuri is helping me! This is great!' Yuka thought. "Alright, let's do it!"

Ranma turned to face Akane. "You're going DOWN!"

"Nuh uh!" Akane smiled. "Ranma Saotome, I challenge you!"

'Excellent…' Yuka handed them a deck of cards. "Since we're all wearing a different number of things, it's all or nothing! You lose, you're nude!"

Sayuri smiled.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Ranma sat on the floor, one card in her hand… the joker.

'DAMMIT!' Ranma facefaulted.

Akane sighed in relief. "There, I beat you, Ranma! Yes!"

Ranma groaned. "Fine, fine…"

The pigtailed girl took off her clothes and placed them in her bag.

"She IS a girl…." Sayuri stated the obvious in awe.

Ranma facefaulted yet again.

"Yes, you're right…" Yuka nodded, finger under her lip.

Akane facepalmed. "Honestly…"

"Aw, man!" Yuka whined as she lost. "It's not fair…"

Sayuri smiled, hands folded under her cat chin. "Do it. You made this condition…"

Yuka grumbled and got nude. "Happy?"

Ranma and Sayuri nodded.

Akane just shook her head. "Alright, Sayuri. I guess it's you against me now."

Ranma did her best not to look at Sayuri.

"This is so weird…" Yuka mumbled. "Want some juice, Ranma?"

The pigtailed girl shrugged. "Sure."

Yuka bent over and rummaged through her belongings.

Ranma smiled.

"I win!" Akane declared happily. "I won!"

'Darn.' Yuka frowned. 'Maybe the next game…'

Sayuri got out of her costume and sat uneasily.

Yuka still rummaged through her stuff. "Hey Akane, want some lemonade for your win?"

"Sure." Akane smiled.

Yuka gave her a glass bottle of lemonade.

"Where did you get this?" Akane asked.

"At a foreign goods store…" Yuka answered. "I think it had some guy's name on the label… But it's in English, so I don't know for sure…"

Akane shrugged and started drinking it.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

"Well, I'm actually starting to feel feminine now." Ranma sweatdropped as she, Yuka, and Sayuri were in a corner of Akane's room. "Who puts alcohol in lemonade!?"

Akane was swinging around in circles, an almost empty bottle in hand. "Hehehehehe… Naked girls… Yay!"

"I didn't do it!" Yuka stressed. "SHE opened the bottle!"

Ranma rubbed a giant bump on her head. "The bottle cap should have been a clue…"

"So… what do we do?" Sayuri asked, hiding behind the other two. "If she was able to do that to Ranma…"

Ranma growled. "I WON'T LET THAT HAPPEN AGAIN!"

With that, the pigtailed girl blitzed Akane…

*WHAMO*

… Only to be punched in the face by Akane and go flying hard into the wall.

"Got any OTHER bright ideas?" Yuka rolled her eyes. "Stupidity is doing the same thing twice and expecting different results, you know."

"Shuddup," Ranma slurred as she got up off the floor.

"We party!" Akane giggled. "Best friends! Whoo!"

"Akane, please, put the bottle down." Sayuri tried to get control of the situation from behind Yuka. "We need you to…"

Ranma jumped Akane then.

*CRASH* Akane responded by knocking Ranma through the boarded-up window.

"GET DOWN!" Yuka pushed Sayuri to the floor. "This is bad, this is bad, this is bad-bad-bad!"

"Whee! A bed!" Akane jumped on her bed. "SoOoo soft…"

"This is so embarrassing!" Sayuri trembled. "We're right next to the light switch. Should we turn it off?"

"I think we should just bolt for it," Yuka suggested.

"But… but we're naked!" Sayuri blushed.

Yuka tiptoed towards the door. "Better embarrassed than DEAD!"

"Mmmm… Soft… So soft…" Akane squeezed a pillow. "Boing…"

Sayuri sighed. "Fine, but this is your fault."

Yuka opened the door and went through it, followed by Sayuri.

"Whew." Yuka closed the door. "Close call."

*FLASH* A bright light shone upon the two girls.

Nabiki stood holding a camera, a smug look on her face. "Well, well, well… Nice party. Smile for the camera."

A few more photos were taken.

"N-Nabiki!" Sayuri covered herself.

"Oh no…" Yuka fell to the floor, tears falling down her cheeks. "Why?"

Nabiki shrugged. "I like being prepared for everything. I might need these someday."

The middle Tendo entered her room and closed the door.

"I'll never get married now!" Yuka collapsed.

Sayuri tried her best to reassure her friend that things would get better, while not believing it herself.

"Things couldn't possibly get any worse!" Yuka cried.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

"It's getting rather loud up there…" Nodoka noted.

Kasumi nodded. "More tea, Auntie?"

"Yes, thank you, Kasumi," Nodoka sighed blissfully.

"Nyrall…" a red cat shook itself dry and walked into the house.

"Oh my…" Kasumi bent down. "Are you alright, Ranma-kitty?"

Nodoka couldn't resist smiling. "Daughter, why are you here?"

Ranma rolled her eyes and muttered a few things.

Nodoka looked towards Kasumi.

"I don't know either. I don't speak cat, I'm afraid." Kasumi shrugged.

Ranma sighed and climbed up the stairs.

Yuka was crying into Sayuri's shoulder when the naked girls head something walk up the stairs.

"Nya…" the red cat muttered as it walked past them and opened the door before strutting in.

Yuka and Sayuri's eyes widened.

"I didn't know cats could do that…" Yuka muttered. "Did you?"

Sayuri shook her head.

*FLASH* Nabiki smirked and closed her door again.

Yuka raised her eyebrow and looked at herself. "Now she's just rubbing it in. What difference does this… Ooh… OH SHOOT!"

Yuka let go of Sayuri and faced away from her, hands in her lap.

Sayuri blinked rapidly. "Huh… What?"

"Great, now I'll also be thought of as a lesbian slut!" Yuka cried. "And it's all my fault! Sorry, Sayuri… I'm SORRY! Go ahead and hit me…"

"Huh?" Sayuri went chibi, eyes blank in confusion.

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Ranma jumped onto Akane's bed. "Nyan…"

"Here, kitty, kitty…" Akane slurred. "Have a little 'nade with Tendo Akane."

The cat rolled her eyes and grabbed the bottle from Akane.

"Come on now, be a nice pussy cat. Hehehe…" Akane laughed drunkenly.

Ranma hit Akane over the head with the bottle, knocking her out.

"Nyrall…" Ranma yawned and climbed across Akane before crawling between her breasts, intending on having a catnap.

Some time later, Yuka peers into the room carefully.

"Yuka?" Sayuri asks.

Yuka wipes away tears that were running down her cheeks. "She's asleep. Come on, let's get dressed."

Yuka and Sayuri dashed in and closed the door before proceeding to get dressed.

"I wonder where Ranma went…" Sayuri noted.

"Good question." Yuka looked out of the hole of a window. "I don't see her out there…"

Sayuri's eyes went wide. "You… you don't think…"

Yuka quivered. "She's strong… But if Akane knocked her out…"

Sayuri hugged herself. "I'm scared, Yuka…"

"Quick, grab that board!" Yuka ordered. "Once we secure Akane's room, we have to go look for Ranma. Hopefully she's just downstairs resting."

Sayuri nodded and grabbed the board.

Yuka hammered in the nails…

"OW!" Yuka sucked her thumb.

… And her thumb.

"I think that did it " Sayuri sighed in relief.

"Nya!" Ranma complained from between Akane's breasts.

Yuka and Sayuri looked around the room.

"Did… did I just hear a cat?" Sayuri asked.

Yuka shrugged. "I heard it too…"

"Ohh… My head…" Akane moaned.

"AH!" Yuka jumped behind Sayuri.

"AH!" Sayuri moved behind Yuka.

Yuka pushed Sayuri into a corner.

"Nya…" Ranma popped her head out from between Akane's breasts.

"Oh… Hi there…" Akane gripped her head. "Ow…"

"A-A-Akane…" Sayuri gulped. "Are you alright?"

"Huh?" Akane got out of bed. "What do you-ooOh…"

Akane stumbled to the door, but was able to grab the frame.

"What happened? Why are there four of you…" Akane looked down. "Ranma, what happened?"

Ranma licked Akane's cheek and smiled like the cat she was. "Nyaa…"

The three girls' eyes widened.

Akane looked to see Yuka and Sayuri cowering in the corner, eyes wet.

Ranma brushed up against Akane's neck. "Nyrawwll…"

Akane's eye twitched. 'I… Did I just? Ranma? CAT?!'

"Akane? Are you alright? You were… not yourself earlier…" Yuka muttered nervously.

'OH NO! I DID!' Akane turned as white as a ghost. "I-I'm going to take a bath now… I'm a bit wet…"

With that, Akane took a few steps out of her room before running downstairs.

"Akane! Wait!" Yuka shouted before chasing her, Sayuri following.

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"Kasumi…" Nodoka's face was filled with worry. "Do girls normally behave this… boldly nowadays?"

Kasumi tilted her head. "Whatever do you mean?"

Nodoka looked into her tea. "They are very… rowdy… at this sleepover."

"Oh yes. Yes, they are." Kasumi looked worried. "They couldn't have gotten the sake, could they?"

"Perhaps…" Nodoka took a sip to calm her nerves.

"Maybe it would be best to go check." Kasumi got up. "Nabiki tried to get it earlier…"

"Hmm…" Nodoka frowned. "Seems like a bad influence…"

Kasumi left to go check on the sake she'd hidden.

'I hope nothing bad has happened,' Nodoka thought.

That's when Akane ran down the stairs and to the bathroom, Ranma popping out of her top.

"Oh dear…" Nodoka had a hand to her mouth.

Yuka and Sayuri followed shortly thereafter, gasping for breath.

Nodoka shook her head. 'Girls these days sure have changed…'

Rama rode in between Akane's breasts like a baby kangaroo as the blue-haired girl got into the inner bath and started the furo up.

"Ranma…" Akane leaned on the furo for support. "Did you… Did you do THAT… with me… as a cat?"

"Nya…" Ranma rubbed her face on Akane's breasts.

Akane slumped to the floor, tears in her eyes. "Why… Why?"

Ranma turned around and patted Akane in a 'there, there' way.

Yuka and Sayuri got to the door of the bathroom and placed their ears against it.

"Don't DO THAT!" Akane picked up Ranma from the scruff of her neck and threw her into the water, causing herself to fall over and sprawl out on the floor.

"PPTHH! ACK!" Ranma coughed. "Whatcha do THAT for!?"

"THAT was for drug raping me, IDIOT!" Akane growled from the floor, struggling to stand up. "I'm… I even have a hard time staying upright!"

Sayuri and Yuka's eyes widened.

"WHAT!?" Ranma exclaimed. "WHAT THE?! I DON'T EVEN…!"

"DON'T you WHAT **ME**!" Akane balled her fists and got up to a seating position. "You got me drunk and did… THAT to me!"

"Hey, I didn't get you drunk, ya idiot!" Ranma yelled.

"Oh, well, excuse me for not believing you, but you DID do THAT to my… breasts…" Akane's face reddened. "My body is wet with your… your… ARGGG!"

Yuka and Sayuri stepped away from the door.

"She's gonna kill me if she figures it out," Yuka whispered.

"Let's get out of here," Sayuri whispered back.

Yuka nodded and they fled to Akane's room.

"Alright, TIME OUT!" Ranma screamed. "All that happened was that YOU drunk spiked lemonade and SMACKED ME NUMEROUS TIMES! So I came into your room and knocked you out!"

"Yeah, and messed with my body!" Akane accused. "It's MY body… Mine… mine…"

"ARG! Akane!" Ranma facepalmed. "When I'm a cat, my mind… isn't too advanced… I just DO things simply. Not thinking too much. Pretty much a one-track mind. And that was to get you to stop hitting me all over your room and into the koi pond. All I did was hit you with the glass bottle and then fall asleep there… It's nice, you know…. Very comfy…"

Akane scrunched her lips. "You LICKED ME!"

"…" Ranma rolled her eyes. "It was a cat kiss on the cheek, Akane…"

"Alright…" Akane thought about it, head moving in circles as she looked at the ceiling. "Then… why is my pajama top wet? Huh? Yeah…"

"Smell it." Ranma crossed her arms.

"What?" Akane blinked. "What did you say?"

"It smells like lemonade," Ranma clarified.

Akane smelled her top. "It does. Mmm… lemonade…"

"Now, do you REALLY think that I would have… sex with you as a cat?" Ranma raised an eyebrow. "Do you?"

Akane bit her lip. "Well… you licked my breasts…"

"DO you?" Ranma repeated.

"No…" Akane sighed. "I'm sorry, it's just… Well, it LOOKED like it…"

"And you were drunk crazy." Ranma smirked. "Punching me all over your room..."

Akane's face got redder. "RANMA!"

"It's true." Ranma shrugged. "Or do you not see the bruises on my face and the bump on my head?"

Akane looked closely and saw said injuries. "I-I didn't MEAN to…"

"Look, I'll forgive you IF you come with me on my shopping trip with my mom." Ranma's shoulders slumped. "I… I really need you there…"

Akane hugged Ranma. "I'll do it…"

Ranma smiled. "Good… Now, let's finish this sleepover thing."

*Splash* Akane fell into the furo with Ranma, soaking her pajamas.

"Whoa…" Ranma waved her hand over her nose. "I smell the alcohol in your breath. That was just ONE bottle, Akane! Wow!"

"Ohhh, my head…" Akane groaned.

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"There, the room's clean now," Yuka sighed in relief. "She won't find out, right?"

Sayuri shrugged.

Yuka wiped her forehead. "I really, REALLY hope that she doesn't wonder why there's a poster there over that dent in the wall."

Suddenly, Ranma zoomed into the room with Akane in her arms, shutting the door quickly.

"Um…" Yuka sweatdropped.

"Why are you two nude?" Sayuri asked.

Akane's face was green. "Oh, I think that made it worse…"

Ranma sighed. "Akane got soaked, but I think no one saw us."

Sayuri whistled. "That fast?"

"Yeah huh." Ranma smirked. "Now, lie down on the bed, Akane…"

"I think I'm going to be sick," Akane groaned.

The three other girls got Akane into bed easily.

"So…" Sayuri twiddled her fingers. "What now?"

"I dunno." Ranma shrugged. "Got any more of that lemonade? We need to get rid of it."

Yuka waved her arms defiantly. "No, no, NO! That bottle… The alcohol-having lemonade… stuff. It wasn't on purpose! And it was the only one!"

Sayuri and Ranma stared at her oddly.

"…" Yuka sweated. "Hey Ranma, I nearly forgot. You wanted juice, right? Well, here, I'll even open it for you," she offered, pulling out a juice.

Ranma blinked and scratched her head. "Sure…"

"Here, WHOA!" Ttrying to hurry up, Yuka tripped over her own feet, causing the opened juice to go flying.

*Splash* Ranma turned into a cat.

Sayuri and Yuka gasped simultaneously.

Ranma facepalmed. "Nyan…"

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'I wonder where Kasumi is,' Nodoka thought as she finished her tea. 'The sake wasn't stolen, was it?'

Nodoka reached for her katana that wasn't there and rose to her feet.

That's when Kasumi came back into the room, smiling.

"Kasumi, did you find the sake?" Nodoka asked.

"Oh yes, Auntie." Kasumi smiled. "It was right where I hid it."

Nodoka raised an eyebrow, but shook off her suspicions and sat back down.

"Want more tea, Auntie?" Kasumi asked with a smile.

"Sure…" Nodoka answered.

"Oh, the excitement is building up again," Kasumi sighed blissfully. "So wonderful…"

Nodoka let out a sigh. "From a certain point of view…."

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"Am I dreaming, Sayuri?" Yuka asked, dazed.

Sayuri pinched her butt.

"OW!" Yuka complained.

"No…" Sayuri answered. "I'm seeing it too."

Ranma was rubbing her face, yowling like the cat that she was.

"This can only mean…" Yuka gulped.

"That she is…" Sayuri's eyes widened.

"A WITCH!" the duo yelled simultaneously.

"NyanAIIAH!" Ranma double facepalmed, shaking her head.

"Who's a witch?" Akane asked, groaning.

"Nyan nya nyawrall!" Ranma complained.

"Or maybe you're a witch's familiar?" Sayuri asked, scratching her head.

"Familiar to who?" Akane asked. "Is Ranma a kitty?"

Yuka's eyes widened. "Akane… You… you're a witch?!"

"Apparently your last name is Kuno." Akane sweatdropped. "Get hot water."

"Sure…" Yuka calmed herself. "Hehehe… A witch… That's ridiculous…"

Sayuri looked at Ranma to Akane to Ranma again. "So… who is the witch, then?"

"China," Akane answered. "I guess… Ranma, is that right?"

Ranma sighed.

"Still…" Sayuri smiled. "Ranma is even cuter now! May I pet you, Ranma?"

Ranma rolled her eyes but walked over to Sayuri to be petted, but only three times.

Yuka came back soon enough with a kettle of hot water.

"Nya…" Ranma got out of Sayuri's grasp and grabbed the kettle with her teeth.

*Splash*

"OW, that's hot!" Ranma seethed in pain.

"Wow…" Yuka muttered.

Akane held out a finger. "Don't tell the school, got it?"

Sayuri and Yuka nodded.

Ranma took a deep breath. "It went like this…."

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Kasumi put a hand to her mouth. "Ranma must not want to be a kitty right now…"

Nodoka nodded. "I am going to bed now, Kasumi. Goodnight."

"Goodnight." Kasumi smiled. "I should be sleeping too…"

With that, both women went to bed.

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"There." Ranma crossed her arms. "Are we good now?"

"Not quite…" Yuka muttered. "I need to see it again."

Ranma sighed.

Nervous, Yuka took the juice that was still opened from earlier and held it over Ranma's head carefully.

Ranma stood there, waiting.

*Splash* *THUMP*

Yuka fell over, causing the juice to hit her, Ranma AND Sayuri.

"Great," Sayuri sighed. "Ranma's now juiced AND you messed up my clothes."

"Nya!" Ranma complained.

"So the story checks out…" Yuka mumbled.

"OF COURSE IT DOES!" Akane yelled. "Honestly!"

Ranma poured the rest of the water from the kettle over herself, but the water had cooled too much.

"Nyan!" Ranma complained.

Sayuri threw her arms up in the air. "Let's go to sleep so that we don't end up making things worse."

Yuka blinked. "Good idea…"

Sayuri and Yuka got out of their juiced pajamas and got out their futons, nude.

Ranma sighed and jumped into Akane's bed.

Yuka smiled. 'It worked! Ukyo will be mine!'

"Goodnight, everyone!" Akane yawned.

"Goodnight!" Sayuri smiled.

"Goodnight!" Yuka turned out the lights.

"Nya nyaght…" Ranma smiled like the cat she was.

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[I'm bored, Tendo,] Genma's sign said as he sat below deck as a panda.

"So am I, Saotome. So am I…" Soun sighed.

The ship rocked back and forth as it sailed across the sea.

[I spy…] Genma's sign said. [Something brown.]

"Not this again…" Soun covered his eyes. "I'm going to sleep."

[But I'm bored,] Genma's sign complained.

"Goodnight Saotome," Soun said and fell asleep.

Time passed, nothing happening.

[I'm still bored.] Genma waved his sign to no avail.

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**Author's notes:** wowza! An update! A crazy one too! Well guest, you're right, sleepover. But no Ukyo… And Raw666, they are cat claws… yeah… anyway, see you next time! I'm the Text!


	7. IIII II

Ranma-chan, the Cat

~Noy Telinú~

**Warning:** don't get raped by domestic cats, they have barbed penises that destroy the vagina on the way out. O_O

**Caution:** mothers can be a bit… interfering when it comes to teenage love lives…

**Notice:** that it's St. Patrick's day in participating countries. So wear green and be careful …

You have been warned….

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_**IIII II**_: If you take a cat shopping…

The light creeped its way into Akane's room, despite the boardedup windows. The blue-haired girl had a tiny red cat named Ranma sleeping between her breasts. Yuka and Sayuri were sharing a futon… naked… facing each other… with their arms and legs entangled.

"Aw, that is SO sweet…" Nabiki smirked and pulled out her camera.

*Flash* The light from the camera startled everyone.

"Uhhghh…" Akane yawned. "Good morning, Nabiki… NABIKI!"

The middle Tendo winked. "Hey there, sis. It's about time you girls woke up. It's nearly lunchtime."

Yuka blinked. "Sayuri? What… AHHH!" The brown-haired girl franticly tried covering herself.

Ranma nyaned in annoyance.

Sayuri's eyes were wide open as she just lay there in a pool of her own drool.

Akane growled. "NABIKI! GET OUT!"

Nabiki shrugged. "Fine, fine. I'll leave you to your bestiality orgy."

With that, Nabiki left the room.

Akane crossed her arms. "Honestly…"

The youngest Tendo's eyes went wide, however, as she saw her two friends tangled up in the same futon.

Ranma nyaned happily as she watched Yuka try to escape with her dignity and Sayuri not moving, still in shock.

"Ahh!" Yuka got her foot stuck in a sheet.

*Splat* Yuka fell over and faceplanted onto Akane's floor, her backside facing Sayuri.

Sayuri's eyes rolled to the back of her head and she passed out, a giant smile on her face.

"…" Akane sweatdropped.

"Nyaaaaa…" Ranma purred.

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Nodoka tried not to laugh, and in doing so frowned. "This curse of yours _is_ rather bothersome, daughter."

A wet Ranma sighed from Akane's arms.

The blue-haired girl giggled. "I have to admit, Ranma, this knapsack you have sure is handy…"

Nodoka agreed. "Perhaps a trip to the baths would be in order."

"I don't know…" Akane mused. "What do you think, Ranma?"

The cat hissed loudly in her arms.

"Alright, alright…" Akane tried to calm Ranma down. "We'll get some hot water-HEY!"

Ranma jumped from Akane's arms and dove into her knapsack, disappearing from view.

Nodoka blinked. "How?"

Akane shrugged.

Moments ticked away and the two started to get worried.

Akane flipped the bag over and shook it, but nothing came out.

Nodoka frowned.

"Um… This is awkward…" Akane muttered. "Ranma? Can you hear me?"

The silence was deafening to the duo.

Akane gulped as sweat formed on her face. "Hehehe… She's fine… I hope…"

Nodoka was just starting to lose it, but then something happened.

A giant umbrella popped out of the knapsack, causing Akane to dodge out of the way. The hand holding it was covered in a thick glove.

Akane's eye twitched as Ranma stepped out of the knapsack in full winter clothes, covered from head to toe.

"MPphMgrpgh," Ranma spoke, her voice muffled by the thick clothing.

Akane sweatdropped. "You have GOT to be kidding me!"

Ranma took her knapsack and started walking towards the store.

"I believe that is a bit… much, daughter," Nodoka observed.

Ranma shrugged.

"Honestly…" Akane facepalmed.

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The trio finally made it to a clothing store and Ranma was putting everything back into her knapsack.

"Oh, so you dyed your hair red again, daughter?" Nodoka asked as she noticed Ranma's hair.

"Magic like, yeah." Ranma nodded. "I prefer doing things as a girl with a different color other than black. It helps with the whole school thing…"

Akane shook her head in disbelief. "How…? Ranma, how did you change back to a girl, put on all those clothes AND dye your hair in that bag!? It's driving me crazy just thinking about it!"

Ranma blinked. "Oh yeah, there's a lot of room in there. I just ran the stove to boil the water…"

"A _stove_?" Akane's mouth dropped.

Ranma nodded. "Right now just my tent and stuff is set up in there. Nothing fancy."

"How… how does that even work!?" Akane gripped her head.

Ranma rolled her eyes. "First you put water in a kettle…"

"No! Not that!" Akane growled. "How can you have enough room for all that stuff and move around!?"

"Magic?" Ranma shrugged. "I dunno. It was a gift, remember? But yeah, it has, like, infinite space or something."

Nodoka grabbed Ranma's hands. "Daughter… could I have a bag like that?"

"Um…" Ranma was feeling nervous from all these questions and she pulled away. "If I see the one who makes them again, sure…"

That's when Ranma pulled off her final articles of heavy clothing, revealing that she was wearing her Chinese dress.

Nodoka smiled. "Daughter, is this the dress you talked about earlier?"

"Yes; yes, it is. But enough of this… Onward!" Ranma bravely walked into the extremely feminine clothing store.

The other two glanced at each other briefly before they started to follow.

Only for Ranma to run out of the store and place her back against the door, face red and gasping heavily, before the other two could even walk into the store.

Akane sweatdropped.

Nodoka's face was full of concern. "Daughter? What is the matter?"

"Too… much…" Ranma muttered. "My heart… can't take it…"

A giant question mark appeared over the other two females.

"I don't think I can do this," Ranma whimpered.

Akane frowned. "Yeah, I don't think so."

Ranma looked up in confusion only to have her eyes nearly pop out of her head as Akane grabbed her arm and pulled her inside as if Ranma were a child.

Nodoka nearly giggled at the sight.

Ranma started to feel lightheaded as she was pulled through the store. It didn't help that the front was the lingerie section.

"Here we go…" Akane stopped and put her arm around Ranma's shoulders. "Let's start off easy. Tops. Go find one you like."

Ranma's eyes glazed over as she stood there, motionless.

Nodoka caught up with the girls and was quite puzzled to see Ranma just standing here.

Akane gave Ranma a tiny push in the back.

*ZOOM* The redheaded girl zipped off, disappearing in a blink of the eye.

Akane slumped, and sighed.

"This was a bad idea… wasn't it?" Nodoka asked, mostly to herself.

Akane straightened herself up. "I'll check this way…"

As Nodoka and Akane split up to look for her, Ranma was in a corner underneath a clothing rack, hugging her knees in a fetal position and rocking back and forth.

'I can't do this! It's just so… And the women here! They're watching me! It's like they're dissecting me with their eyes!' Ranma shivered. 'Do they think I'm a fake? Are they judging me?! I'm just so… so…'

Ranma gripped her knees tighter together. "… Scared."

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Genma fanned his panda face with a sign as he tried to stay in the shade on the lower decks of the boat.

"So hot…" Soun whined, mostly nude. "Saotome… how much farther?"

Genma showed his friend a sign. [A week… maybe.]

"I spy…" Soun mumbled.

Genma threw a sign, hitting him in the face.

[Shut up,] it read.

Soun was knocked out, however, as the sign sent him to dreamland.

Genma groaned and lay back down, wondering what his worthless son who wouldn't be male was doing.

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Ranma was hiding from view, alone and scared.

Not something that Genma would be proud of.

Nodoka didn't care, though, when she found her daughter sniffling in a fetal position. "Ranma…"

"Wwhhat?" Ranma replied pathetically, wiping her nose with her hand.

Nodoka felt for her daughter and hugged the girl with all her might. "There, there… Maybe this was too much to ask. Come, let us go."

Ranma gripped her mother tighter. "N-no. No, I will get through this. I… I can't fail you, Mom. Please, I can't…"

Nodoka felt her daughter's tears running down her back and closed her eyes. "You can never fail me, Ranma. I couldn't be more proud of my daughter."

"You're just saying that." Ranma sniffled.

"No. No, I'm not," Nodoka replied. "Why would you think that?"

Ranma pulled herself into a face-to-face position with Nodoka. "Look at me! I'm hiding in a store, scared spitless! I'm a disgrace as a girl. Maybe... maybe I _should_ have been cursed to be a boy…"

Nodoka narrowed her eyes and gripped Ranma's shoulders. "Now listen here, young lady! You are not, I repeat, NOT a disgrace, you hear me?! I've spent too many years wasting away looking for you to have you think of yourself like this. After everything your father has done to you, after all the pain our family has gone through…"

Ranma wiped her tears away as she saw her own mother cry as well.

*CRASH* A clothing rack fell over, clanking on the floor.

The Saotomes looked over to see Akane trying to look innocent and failing.

"…" Ranma tried to say something, but couldn't really find the words and closed her mouth.

"Do you want to go home or not?" Nodoka asked her daughter, ignoring Akane.

Ranma took a deep breath. "I'll do this."

Mother and daughter got up off the floor, ready for shopping.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Akane's face was red from embarrassment as they finally began to shop.

Most people would have guessed it was due to the redheaded girl firmly grasping her arm in a tight squeeze. But those who saw her a while earlier knew it was most likely because she knocked a clothing rack over.

The truth was that Akane was embarrassed because she was caught eavesdropping on her friend and her friend's mother as they shared a personal moment… that she interrupted by not paying attention.

It was why she hadn't pushed Ranma off yet.

Nodoka silently shook her head as they continued to walk around the store, trying to ease Ranma's nerves.

It didn't seem to be working.

"Um… Ranma… I can't feel my arm…" Akane said offhandedly, trying to not draw too much attention.

Ranma, teeth chattering already, tried to calm down and loosen her grip.

"Hi there, welcome to-" a saleslady greeted the trio, only to but cut of by Ranma's yelp.

"AH!" Ranma hid behind Akane, grabbing onto her back as if she were Yoda.

Nodoka shook her head sadly.

The saleslady sweatdropped. "Uh… As I was saying…"

"Could you show us your Western, customized t-shirts?" Nodoka asked, formulating an idea.

"Sure." The saleslady turned around. "This way, please."

Akane sighed in relief as Ranma got off her.

"Sorry…" Ranma whispered, head down.

As the trio came to that section of the store, Ranma became much more comfortable with her surroundings.

"Here we are. Now, is there anything else you need?" the saleslady asked.

Akane paused and glanced at Ranma, who was looking interested. Then she looked over to Nodoka, who appeared relived. "No, we're good."

The saleslady bowed and moved on.

Ranma let go of Akane and started looking around.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Three girls sat at an ice cream shop. One was clearly enjoying herself. The other two… not so much.

"You want us to WHAT?!" Yuka could not believe what she was told.

Nabiki scooped some ice cream and ate it. "I said that I want you two to do some photo shoots for me."

Yuka's eye twitched. "How about NO?!"

Nabiki glanced at Sayuri, who was white in shock, all the color drained from her.

Yuka crossed her arms and turned away defiantly.

"How about yes, or I'll show others the photos from last night…" Nabiki smirked.

Yuka paled. "You… you really mean it?"

Nabiki nodded. "You know I'll do it. I already have an idea of whom to sell them to…"

Sayuri slumped in her seat, unresponsive.

Yuka gulped. "Why us? Why not Akane? Or… or even Ranma!?"

Nabiki shook her head slowly. "I already get money for Akane, and Ranma is off limits. She's suffered too much. Oh, and if I find out you two spilled the beans on Ranma's sex, I'll show the photos to every boy at school."

Yuka shivered. "You're cruel."

"Flattery will get you nowhere." Nabiki ate more ice cream. "Besides, the way I'm planning it… this could benefit you."

Yuka bit her lip. "How am I supposed to believe you?"

"Do you have a choice?" Nabiki smirked. "Here's the plan: I'll take non-nude shots of you two together that will hint at lesbianism. This way, guys will start noticing you."

Sayuri slithered to the floor, drool escaping from her lips.

Yuka twiddled her fingers under the table. "I don't know. That seems contradictory…"

Sayuri climbed back up, wiping the drool off her face. "Yuka has a point. Isn't being a lesbian what Akane should do to get guys OFF of her?"

Nabiki smirked. "Ah, but there's a difference. Akane doing that would give the impression that the boys MADE her lesbian. With you two, it'll get you attention."

"Um, sexual orientation doesn't work that way…" Sayuri muttered.

"Do you _really_ give the boys at school that much credit?" Nabiki raised an eyebrow.

Sayuri and Yuka glanced at each other and silently admitted she had a point.

"I'll tell you what… First set, below the neck; that way it's mysterious," Nabiki offered. "What do you say?"

Sayuri made a short nod, like in anime. "Mm."

Yuka sighed. "Oh, alright…"

Nabiki smirked. "Deal."

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

"So many of these are from America…" Ranma muttered as she browsed the shirts. "Hmmm… This one looks good."

Akane smiled as Ranma picked out a shirt.

The t-shirt was one of the protagonist of Disney-Pixar's _Brave_, posed with a bow and arrow.

"That hair must be a pain to deal with," Ranma commented on the shirt.

Nodoka nodded as she glanced upon it. "Would you like to try it on?"

Ranma hesitated. "Um… You mean now? Here?"

Akane failed to hold in her giggles. "No, no. Come on, I'll show you…"

Nodoka smiled as Akane dragged Ranma off to a changing room.

"Here, go in and change," Akane ordered as she pushed Ranma into a changing booth and closed the curtain.

Ranma sighed and undressed. 'I can do this… I can do this…'

Akane smiled. 'Took longer than expected, but things are finally looking up.'

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Kasumi was humming as she cleaned the house yet again.

With everyone else out, Kasumi was in unfamiliar territory. Home alone. Even over the last year, her father would be home nearly all the time.

So the emptiness was concerning for her.

"I wonder when they will get back…" Kasumi said to herself.

The girl sighed and continued to work, going back to humming to take her mind off the thing that was bothering her the most…

Loneliness.

She was just finishing up the hallway on the second floor when she noticed a wrapper sticking out of Nabiki's door.

"Oh my… Messy, messy…" Kasumi shook her head.

Kasumi picked it up, but her mind was already wandering to the other messy things that could be in her sister's room.

The eldest Tendo daughter placed a hand to her mouth as she was chibified. Flashbacks of Nabiki eating things, making a mess, and being a slob played out above her head in a thought bubble.

Kasumi, her blank eyes staring ahead, yelped. "Oh no!"

The bubble burst and Kasumi was back to normal as she stared at Nabiki's door.

Nabiki told Kaumi to not bother with her room anymore. She said it was to help ease the burden, but Kasumi knew that was a lie.

After a bit of discussion, they agreed that Kasumi would clean Nabiki's room once a week. That is it.

"What is she hiding in there?" Kasumi wondered aloud.

Kasumi knew that her sister MUST be hiding something. But what, she couldn't say.

So she stared at the door, facing her next biggest thing that was bothering her.

Lack of excitement.

Things got more exciting once Ranma came, but right now Kasumi was bored and alone. Finding out Nabiki's secret could bring some excitement back into her life.

"But is that a good choice?" Kasumi pondered. "Is it wrong?"

*Pop* A shoulder angel that looked like Kasumi in a toga and a halo popped into existence on Kasumi's right shoulder.

"Oh no, don't do that." The angel titled her head to the side and smiled. "That would be rude."

Kasumi frowned. "You're right. Still…"

*Pop* Another angel popped into existence on Kasumi's other shoulder. This one was in a revealing nightgown and bikini bottom.

"But it is exciting." The bikini-bottom-clad angel smiled and tilted her head.

"True…" Kasumi nodded. "But isn't that rude?"

The toga angel gave an anime nod. "Mm."

"Yes, but it IS exciting," the bikini bottom angel reminded.

"Oh my…" Kasumi fretted.

The oldest Tendo daughter stared at the door, wondering what she should do.

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The redheaded girl groaned as she pulled the shirt down yet again.

"Akane!" Ranma complained. "Why won't it FIT!?"

The blue-haired girl, who was still outside the booth, rolled her eyes. "Can I come in and see what's the matter?"

"Sure," Ranma muttered.

Akane peeked in behind the curtain. "Well, sometimes it's the-RANMA!"

Ranma tilted her head in confusion as Akane looked like she was having a seizure. The pigtailed girl was only wearing the t-shirt. Nothing else.

"Um… are you alright, Akane?" Ranma asked, scratching her head.

Akane shook her head clear and came in all the way, making sure the curtain was shut.

"Akane?" Ranma was now really confused.

The blue-haired girl whispered loudly. "Why are you half naked?!"

Ranma blinked. "'Cause you told me to? Anyway, this shirt doesn't fit. But that doesn't make any sense. It's my size…"

Akane sighed and rubbed her temples. "Ranma, the size you're talking about… Are those men's sizes?"

The redheaded girl squirmed. "N-No…"

"Really?" Akane raised an eyebrow.

Ranma nodded.

"… Well, it COULD be that it's from America…" Akane tried to explain. "Maybe you grabbed one in their standard sizes and not ours? What size are you, anyway?"

Ranma tapped her lips. "I think I'm 140 cm…"

"What?" Akane deadpanned. 'Did they change the sizes AGAIN?! HONESTLY! THOSE CORPORATE JERKS!'

"Yeah, 140 cm…" Ranma muttered, embarrassed. "The adult sizes are too big for me. At least in China I don't feel like a kid."

Akane facepalmed. "Was that for boys' clothes?"

"Well, duh." Ranma rolled her eyes. "That dress was the only girls' clothing I have. I told you that before."

Akane gripped her head to resist screaming at her friend. "Ranma. Boys and girls have different sizes…"

"They do?" Ranma murmured. "That would explain why the girls kept bragging that they were a 2…"

Akane took a deep breath to calm herself. "Alright, lets see what the tag says…"

Ranma turned around and showed Akane her back.

"Hmm… it IS the size you said… Wonder wh-" Akane nearly smacked herself. "Of course! Ranma, your breasts!"

Ranma looked down. "What about them?"

Nodoka stood outside the dressing room, feeling worried. "Is there a problem?"

"AH!" Ranma reacted to the sudden voice.

*Wham* The movement caused both girls to fall, Akane on top of Ranma.

"Ranma? Akane?" Nodoka peered inside the room.

The Saotome mother was shocked to see what was in front of her.

Akane was straddling Ranma, who was nearly nude, pulling at her shirt.

"It's not what it looks like!" Akane exclaimed.

"Unfortunately," Ranma laughed.

Nodoka and Akane stared at Ranma.

"What?" Ranma kept her cool.

Nodoka shook her head. "How is it going in here?"

Akane sighed. "We… need to measure Ranma's bust. We forgot to take that into account."

Ranma blinked in realization. "Ohh…"

"Daughter, you do not know the size of your breasts? Or did they grow recently?" Nodoka asked, coming in and closing the curtain.

"Um…" Ranma sweated. "I don't think I did…"

Akane got up off Ranma. "Then… how did you get that dress?"

The pigtailed girl shrugged. "That was a gift. See, there was this woman who was, like, a martial arts clothes maker or something and measured me in all these areas in less than two seconds…"

"It is something you should know," Nodoka informed her daughter. "Akane, hand me that tape measure."

Akane looked where Nodoka was pointing and found a tape measure hanging on a wooden rod. The blue-haired girl grabbed it and handed it to Nodoka.

"Now daughter, this might take a while and there's a little math involved, so please remember the measurements as we don't have anything to write them down," Nodoka instructed.

Ranma gulped.

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Kasumi struggled with her decision as she held the doorknob of Nabiki's room.

Her shoulder angels smiled at her, not TELLING her to do anything, but simply stating facts.

"So exciting… but rude…" Kasumi repeated to herself for the umpteenth time.

Her angels stood there, smiling at her, eyes closed, heads tilted.

This would have gone on for hours if not for another vision appearing to help.

"Nya…" Ranma, a cat, voiced her opinion on Kasumi's head.

Kasumi looked up to see the cat peering down at her.

"You're sooo CUTE!" Kasumi squealed.

"Nya." Ranma nodded.

"So cute!" The Toga angel hugged herself.

"So cute!" The bikini bottom angel shrieked. "Hug her! HUG HER!"

Ranma-chan, the cat jumped off of Kasumi's head into the bikini angel's arms.

"SOOO CUTE!" The angel lost her composure and started squeezing the cat to death. "EEEEEEEE!"

The toga angel suddenly appeared on the other shoulder and glomped the two other figments of Kasumi's imagination.

Kasumi turned to see them so fast that she twisted the doorknob, opening the door.

"AHHH!" the two angels screamed as they saw the room behind Kasumi's head.

Kasumi turned around to see what was so shocking. **"OH MY!"**

Nabiki's walls were covered in photos. Some of Akane, some of Yuka and Sayuri, and the rest group shots from last night. The photos ranged from slice-of-life situations to outright pornography.

"Nyral…" Ranma-kitty nyaned.

"Nabiki is a hentai…" the bikini bottom angel gasped.

The toga one covered her eyes. "So naughty! So naughty! Naughty, naughty, naughty!"

Kasumi saw that her sister had games stacked on her desk. "Oh no! Nabiki! Don't tell me you're into eroge!"

The eldest Tendo girl gawked at the erotic games on Nabiki's desk.

After taking one more glance, Kasumi closed the door.

"So immature…" the bikini-bottomed angel shook her head. "Nabiki needs to grow up. She's 17 and is still looking for a class S relationship. Girls should be looking for boys at that age, not being romantic with other girls still."

"WORSE!" the other angel freaked out. "It's… it's… nude girls! Nabiki might be a… A…!"

"Nyra…" Ranma kitty rolled her eyes.

The bikini bottom angel mused. "Perhaps her being a lesbian might actually do her some good. Once she sees how embarrassing she's being…"

Kasumi was wringing her hands as she listened to the exchange. "But… but Nabiki… Remember how she said she… Remember when she thought Ranma was male?"

Ranma-kitty hissed.

"Oh, right," the toga angel sighed in relief. "She is growing up then… I wonder why she has all these photos, though…"

"Money?" The other angel shrugged. "Whatever it is, it's certainly EXCITING!"

Kasumi nodded. "Exciting."

The angels and cat poofed away and Kasumi was left alone in the hallway.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

A nude Ranma was in a corner of the booth, crouching in a fetal position once again, eyes blank, muttering to herself as she gripped her head. "Never that violated… in my life…"

Nodoka was busy saying numbers over and over again, seeing as her daughter was being uncooperative at the moment.

Akane was trying to figure out what was going on. "Ranma, you did more than this last night…"

Ranma shook her head. "The numbers… They judge me… I know it…"

Seeing how her friend seemed delirious, Akane settled for burying her face in her hands.

"I'll be right back," Nodoka said quickly before leaving the two girls.

Akane sat down in an unoccupied corner and sighed.

"I suck at bein' a girl…" Ranma spat, banging her fist against the wall of the booth.

"Come on now, don't say that," Akane replied as she glanced over to Ranma.

"Why not?" Ranma questioned. "I freaked out because of a tape measure. A TAPE MEASURE! Girls go through this all the time and I got scared…"

Akane tried to think of something to console her. "Well… this IS your first time, after all…"

"Please, stop. Don't make this sound like I just lost my virginity," Ranma muttered.

The blue-haired girl rolled her eyes. "I'm just trying to help here…"

Ranma sighed. "I know. I'm such a tomboy…"

Akane was going to deny that, but she knew it would be lying.

"So… what were the other measurements for? Like around my stomach?" Ranma asked. "It seemed unnecessary."

"Well that's because girls' clothes are different," Akane answered. "More… form fitting, I suppose…"

Ranma's eyes widened. "Oh no… you're RIGHT! Why didn't I notice that before!?"

Akane frowned as she saw Ranma start to panic. "Honestly…"

"I'm back!" Nodoka announced. "Here, try them on."

A giant pile of clothes was now on the floor.

"H-hey!" Ranma complained, almost losing her voice. "What is all this!?"

The redhead pointed to a nightie. A pink nightie.

"Oh, that…" Nodoka smiled. "I couldn't help myself."

Ranma gulped. "I-I'm not wearing that…"

Akane was getting sick and tired of Ranma's nervousness. "And why not?"

"IT'S PINK!" Ranma shouted. "Not to mention it looks like it'll fall apart if I touch it!"

Nodoka crossed her arms. "And why is that a problem?"

Ranma fretted. "Well, you know… Being practical is always better than looks. And this is so thin I doubt it helps keep you warm at all…"

Nodoka and Akane glanced at each other.

Ranma sweated. "What?"

"This will be a long, long day," Nodoka sighed.

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"Hey Kasumi, I'm home!" Nabiki called upon her return, slurping a slurpee.

Her sister poked her head out of the kitchen. "Welcome home!"

Nabiki raised an eyebrow. "Sis… why are you sweating? It's actually pretty cool right now."

Kasumi closed her eyes and smiled. "I was very busy cleaning, so…"

"Sure, whatever." Nabiki finished off her drink. "When will they be back?"

Kasumi frowned. "I don't know."

"Can't be too long," Nabiki mused. "Oh well…"

With that, Nabiki walked up to her room.

"Wait!" Kasumi eeped, closing her mouth.

Nabiki stopped and turned around. "What?"

Kasumi waved it off. "It was nothing, nothing…"

"Uh huh. Sure it was." Nabiki crossed her arms. "What did you do?"

Kasumi smiled and feigned innocence. "Oh, nothing out of the ordinary…"

"Hmmm…" Nabiki rubbed her chin. "Right…"

The middlest Tendo walked up the stairs again and entered her room.

Kasumi sighed in relief.

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"Why is it so tight!?" Ranma complained.

The redhead was in a _Brave_ t-shirt, pulling it down again and again.

Akane was trying not to be envious. "Because that's how things are!"

Nodoka grew concerned over her daughter's continuous discomfort. 'She really WAS raised with a male mindset… I have a very bad feeling about this.'

"It's stupid," Ranma spewed as she looked herself over. "I feel so… exposed… and every time I move my arms I get an instant midriff! Pathetically short sleeves…"

"Well, that wouldn't happen if you would try on a dress!" Akane fumed.

Ranma crossed her arms. "Oh, HELL NO! Nuh uh. No way. YOU may like exposing yourself, but not me!"

"What the…!? You HAVE a Chinese dress, not to mention you ran around NAKED last night!" Akane growled. "Don't accuse ME of exposing MYSELF!"

"That's different!" Ranma argued. "I chose to be like that in a home surrounded by girls I know! Not in a store or on the street! I don't like being looked at like that by strangers! It's too weird!"

"Damn, girl, you need to get laid," an American woman yelled out from a few booths down.

Nodoka spoke up. "Now, now. Calm down, girls…"

Akane's shoulders slumped. "Sorry…"

Ranma nearly laughed and shook her head, looking down. "Huh? Oh, a _Star Wars VII_ shirt… I really want to see that. Looks cool…"

"Daughter?" Nodoka smiled.

"Yeah, Mom?" Ranma looked up..

"I know you are a bit… uneasy…" Nodoka grabbed Ranma by the shoulders. "So to help with this, and to find your true self… I think you should try to find a boyfriend. Don't you think?"

"**WHAT?!"** Ranma's eyes widened in shock.

"Daughter, dear, you are beautiful and would make any man proud to be with you…" Nodoka tried to soothe Ranma, unknowingly with all the wrong words.

Ranma's face turned green. "Uh, no, it would be bad for me to be with a boy…"

Nodoka smiled. "That is why you need to find a man. Someone mature, handsome, manly… Someone to help you on your journey to womanhood."

Ranma held her stomach. "I think I'm gonna be sick…"

"Oh, yes," Nodoka sighed blissfully. "It can cause butterflies in your stomach. But once you find a man to love, one with whom you'll want to have children, it eases…"

*Thud* Ranma fainted, hitting the floor.

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Kasumi hummed as she cooked dinner, smiling and enjoying herself.

But then Nabiki came into the kitchen. "Kasumi. We need to talk."

The eldest Tendo daughter frowned. "About what, Nabiki?"

Nabiki crossed her arms. "What were you doing in my room?"

Kasumi paled. "I… Oh, my…"

"Well?" Nabiki pressed. "GoOo on…"

Kasumi fretted. "I… I didn't mean to…"

Nabiki groaned. "Sis, seriously, I like my privacy. I thought we had a deal."

"But there was trash and I picked it up and your room was there so I thought about it and my fingers slipped, and I… I… Oh, MY!" Kasumi spewed quickly, embarrassed.

"Damn it!" Nabiki pulled herself together. "What did you see?"

Kasumi looked away. "Many, many photos of… underdressed girls… Nabiki, you aren't…"

Nabiki sighed. "No. I'm not."

Kasumi sighed in relief.

Nabiki rolled her eyes. "Jeez, Sis, your sister maybe being a lesbian isn't something to freak out about. Besides… guys, girls, who cares? They don't work on me; only money. Anyway, call me when dinner is ready. I need to do stuff."

"Oh, my…" Kasumi had a hand to her forehead.

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Ranma, back in her Chinese dress, along with Akane sat in the very back corner of the ice cream place.

The rest of the afternoon was a blur for Ranma after she fainted. Nodoka took a few of the clothes they'd looked at and purchased them, saying she'd take them home. Ranma got dressed and ran out of the store, causing Akane to chase her.

When she finally caught up to the redhead, she was drowning her sorrows in ice cream.

Akane tried to comfort her. "There, there. I'm sure she isn't trying to rush you."

Ranma sobbed and ate ice cream.

"You shouldn't have to date when you aren't ready," Akane sighed.

Ranma nodded.

"Don't worry, you'll find a man when you're ready. There's no rush." Akane went to hug Ranma.

"No…" Ranma seethed.

Akane blinked. "Huh?"

Ranma laughed madly. "Don't you get it?! Haven't you noticed yet!? Sure, I never said it, but I thought it would be obvious by now! Especially after last night!"

Akane frowned. "Know what? And I think you need to lay off the ice cream. Remember last time?"

"Yes. Yes, I do." Ranma's eyes crossed as she laughed. "I need it! I need it!"

"Calm down!" Akane insisted. "So immature. You knew this would happen yet you did it anyway!"

Ranma laughed more. "Of course! Of course! But you still don't see it! You don't understand my pain!"

"How am I supposed to help if you won't tell me?!" Akane fumed.

Ranma stopped, her eyes back to normal but overflowing with tears.

"… Ranma?" Akane worried.

"The reason this hurts… Why I hurt… Why I'm here… is because I..." Ranma whispered. "Like girls."

Akane blinked. "So? I like girls too…"

Ranma facepalmed. "No. Not like that. I LIKE girls."

The blue-haired girl raised an eyebrow, clearly confused.

Ranma rubbed her temples, frustrated. "I like girls… a lot."

"And your point is?" Akane tried to figure out what was going on.

"Look, Akane…" Ranma took a deep breath. "I had a girlfriend once."

"Had? What does that mean? What did she stop being your friend for?" Akane asked.

The redheaded girl was hoping that her friend was just messing with her but that line confirmed it. "Look, you know how I hate boys."

"Me too!" Akane nodded, crossing her arms.

"That's not the poin-Ahh!" Ranma really wanted to punch something. "I don't like males at all. Period."

"So… you're saying you still think they're icky?" Akane guessed.

"ARRGG!" Ranma gripped her head. "I… am a lesbian, got it?"

Akane's jaw dropped.

Ranma got up and changed her clothes so fast that Akane didn't even see it.

"Now I guess this is goodbye, then." Ranma took a black comb and turned her hair black again, looking like a guy. "Don't tell my Mom… please… I don't want her to be in more pain."

"WAIT!" Akane grabbed Ranma's arm. "No! Don't go!"

Ranma frowned. "Why not? If I stay I'll be forced into something I hate. Thank you for everything, Akane…"

"No!" Akane held firm. "I don't care if you're a lesbian, I… I'll make sure you won't be forced with a guy! Please, don't go!"

Ranma looked down at Akane, who had started to cry.

"What should I do?" Ranma asked of her.

"Look, we'll think of something…" Akane encouraged.

"But what?" Ranma sighed. "I bet that your sisters would freak if they knew. Can't sleep where I like to anymore…"

Akane took a deep breath. "I don't care. Look, I might not be a lesbian, but you're a girl. And my friend. I stick up for both of them. Besides, Nabiki won't mind and Kasumi… Well… we just won't tell her."

Ranma groaned. "Still sucks, though. Can this day get any worse!?"

*KABLAM* The wall next to them burst open, revealing a purple-haired girl with giant maces that wouldn't be confused with lanterns.

"Nihao." Shampoo smiled.

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**Author's notes:** dun dun DUNNN! Wow! Cliffhanger! Anyway, Kasumi is very traditional, so of course she will see things like that. Nabiki is modern and selfish, so… yeah. And Akane likes girls. She's not a lesbian, but she likes girls. And thus will stand up for them, even if they're lesbian. Oh, and Y2Ranma, Fullmetal Alchemest is closer to what Ranma is dealing with. What with being short and all. Ranma has a male like ego despite being a girl! ^_^ Anyway, I think I'll petition Noy to allow me to answer reviews up top. What do you think? Until next time, I'm the Text! Don't forget to wear green! Whoo!


	8. IIII III

Ranma-chan, the Cat

~Noy Telinú~

**Warning: **walls hurt. Don't try to run through them. You're not Superman, you know…

**Caution:** impending cuteness!

**Notice:** that I, the Text, am not responding to reviews. I iz sad. But, that's because no one said I should in the reviews… oh well… whatever. No one guessed anything right though, so there's that.

You have been warned….

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_**IIII III**_: A wild Shampoo appears

"Uh… oh…" Ranma gulped at the sight.

The music at the shop just so happened play the Pokémon battle theme. Because it's funny that way.

{So…} Shampoo spoke in her native tongue as she stepped forward slowly, grinning the whole time, {I have finally found you, Wild Horse Rice-Planting Girl.}

The pigtailed girl picked up the table she was at and threw it at Shampoo.

*Whack*

*Crash*

The table was deflected and crashed against another wall.

Ice cream shop patrons froze in fear as the staff hid.

{Now I'll… Great.} Shampoo frowned as Ranma disappeared.

Akane squirmed in her seat as Shampoo approached her.

"Where Ranma go?" Shampoo asked, leveling her mace at Akane.

The blue-haired girl pointed out the hole through which Shampoo entered.

{Sneaky little… I'll get you…} Shampoo swore as she ran back out through the hole.

Akane sighed in relief and looked down into her cleavage. "What… was that?"

Ranma, in her cat form, muttered a few things, rubbing her body against Akane's breasts.

"… Right… cat… Of course…" Akane rolled her eyes. "You better not be enjoying yourself in there…"

Ranma responded by purring, rubbing herself against Akane even more.

Akane's eye twitched at that.

"Hey!" The manager looked around. "Who's going to pay for all this? Huh?!"

Akane sweated. "Uh… the Kuno family?"

The manager thought that over. "Sure… why not…?"

The blue-haired girl giggled nervously and backed out of the shop. 'That was a close one.'

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"Alright, now talk. What…was that?" Akane grilled Ranma as they walked back to the dojo.

Ranma sighed. "Her name is Shampoo. It's… complicated right now…"

"Ooh…" Akane nodded. "She's… not a guy, is she?"

"WHAT!?" Ranma shook her head. "You saw her… boobs… Shampoo is a she. Believe me, I know…"

Akane narrowed her eyes. "So she's a former girlfriend then, huh?"

Ranma facepalmed. "Why, you… I, ARGG!"

"Look, while I'm not against it or anything, you being a lesbian causes problems." Akane smirked. "Like crazy ex-girlfriends."

"Are you saying what I think you're saying?" Ranma asked, eye twitching.

Akane rolled her eyes. "No, I'm not saying all gays are promiscuous. Honestly…"

Ranma sighed in relief as she realized that they were at the Tendo home. "Well, thank you for accepting this. Now I can go to my room and relax…"

They opened the door… only to see Shampoo, drinking tea… with Nodoka and Kasumi.

{Hello there.} Shampoo smirked evilly.

"Crap." Ranma slumped.

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Tatewaki Kuno strode down the street, dignified and carrying a bokken. Usually those two things wouldn't be in the same sentence, but… it was Kuno.

Thus, he pushed open the door to a little ice cream shop with his eyes closed. Which would explain why he didn't notice that a wall was missing from the place and that a table was imbedded into another wall…

"Hey!" the manager shouted as he approached Kuno.

… Until now!

"Hm?" Kuno opened his eyes and was aghast at what he saw. "What horrific horrendousness transpired here!?"

The manager frowned. "Crazy martial artist, that's what! Now pay up. I know who you are."

"The Blue Thunder never pays!" Kuno sneered. "Paying would be the utmost dishonorable-"

"Akane Tendo said you would," the manager deadpanned.

"…" Kuno slowly reached into his pocket. "…How much?"

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Akane glanced back and forth between Ranma and Shampoo."Um…"

Suddenly, Ranma blurred as she headed upstairs.

Shampoo blurred after her, giant colorful maces in her hands.

Akane's heart raced as she feared the worst. "Kasumi?"

Kasumi smiled. "She's such a good friend. Tea?"

Nodoka repressed a giggle. "Do not fret, Akane. I am sure Ranma can handle this."

"I… I don't know…"Akane gulped, sweating nervously.

Ranma reached her bedroom, heading for the window.

*CRASH*

Shampoo burst through the door, face determined. {I have you now.}

"Nyeh!" Ranma stuck out her tongue and leapt out the window.

Shampoo followed, throwing one of her maces.

"Yipe!" Ranma ducked under the throw and landed in the Tendo yard.

Shampoo landed across from her, a smirk on her face.

The two stared each other down as the clouds darkened above them.

Akane, Kasumi, and Nodoka stuck their heads out of the Tendo home one by one.

Ranma suddenly blurred, heading for an exit. Shampoo followed closely.

Three pairs of eyes watched as Ranma ran throughout the yard, being chased by Shampoo.

Kasumi excused herself to her room.

"I wonder why Ranma isn't fighting back…" Akane wondered aloud.

Nodoka frowned. "I do not know…"

"Hey, watch the tree!" Ranma exclaimed as she ducked and weaved throughout the yard.

Kasumi came back with a boombox and pressed play.

*Cue "Yakety Sax" music*

Akane and Nodoka glanced at Kasumi.

"It felt appropriate." Kasumi tilted her head and smiled.

With classic chase music now on, the duo really picked up speed.

Kasumi, Nodoka and Akane sat down and watched, drinking tea.

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Nabiki frowned as she watched the manager walk away. "You better have some left for me, Kuno-baby."

Kuno puffed himself up. "The Blue Thunder never runs out!"

"Blue Thunder _still_?" Nabiki raised an eyebrow. "Keeping it, huh? Interesting…"

"Yes, for the heavens obey when I say my name!" Kuno struck a pose.

Nabiki rolled her eyes. "Right… Anyway, I have the usual for you today, plus… something… extra."

"Hmm? What, pray tell, is that?" Kuno sat down.

Nabiki wagged her finger. "Nuh uh. Sundae first."

Kuno kept his face neutral and reached into his pocket.

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Ranma eventually started yelling and screaming as she ran around the Tendo yard being chased by Shampoo.

Akane got bored as the sun neared the horizon and watched with eyes half closed, chin on fist.

"More tea, Akane?" Kasumi asked.

The youngest Tendo shook her head.

"Four minutes," Nodoka mused. "At least she has stamina, even if too… tomboy-like."

"But it is so exciting!" Kasumi smiled.

"Dammit!" Ranma spewed as she tripped over a root and tumbled to the ground.

*Poof*

A dust cloud spread over the area, causing Akane to cough.

"Ranma!" Akane yelled out.

As the dust settled, Shampoo stood over Ranma, mace pointed centimeters from her nose.

Nodoka, and Akane stood in shock. Kasumi had a hand to her mouth.

Shampoo was sweaty, but smirking as she brought her colorful mace forward.

*Tap*

{You are it.} Shampoo smirked.

Akane facefaulted as Ranma swore.

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Nabiki finished her sundae and licked her lips suggestively. "Hmm… Good, good. Now where were we? Ah, yes. Photos."

Kuno's eyes widened as he saw the array of photographs that Nabiki presented before him.

"We have a high kick in a gi. Classic." Nabiki smirked. "And here's one lifting weights. This is Akane moving our refrigerator, one of her breaking cinderblocks, and, lastly, a tired, sweaty pose."

Kuno bit his lip, trying to keep his cool. "HOW… *cough* How much?"

Nabiki shook her head in amusement. "Depends. Will you buy me another sundae?"

"Why you…!" Kuno made a fist.

Nabiki cut him off. "Well, I guess I'll just go home then…"

"Wait!" Kuno panicked. "I'll get you another, Nabiki Tendo."

Nabiki smirked. "That sounds like a reason to stay…"

Kuno withheld a groan as he reached into pocket yet again.

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Shampoo helped Ranma up and they dusted themselves off.

"How long was that?" Ranma asked.

{Twenty-seven days,} Shampoo answered.

Ranma counted her fingers as she tried to remember her numerals for Mandarin. "Um… uh… Whatever. It's still longer than you said it was going to be."

"WHAT?! WHAT IS GOING ON HERE!?" Akane shouted.

Ranma sighed. "I told you it was complicated. We were playing tag…"

Akane's eye twitched. "_What?_"

Nodoka took a deep breath. "Yes. Please explain yourself."

{I was… busy when the Wild Horse left my village with her panda of a father. We were in the middle of a game of tag. Mostly to test our skills,} Shampoo explained.

Nodoka blinked.

Akane stared blankly.

Kasumi smiled and tilted her head.

Ranma sweadropped. "Um, yeah, I don't speak it either… much… Look, it's a long story and I'm tired. To cut it short, we were playing tag when Pops kidnapped me and left. So… we just continued when Shampoo found me."

Akane facefaulted again.

Nodoka coughed politely. "Ranma, could I have a word with you? Privately?"

Ranma guped. "Yes, Mom…"

As Ranma and Nodoka went off to the kitchen, Shampoo picked up and put away her weapons.

"So… your name is Shampoo…" Akane was trying to make sense of the day.

{Yes.} Shampoo nodded as she came into the house and sat down at the table next to Kasumi.

"Tea?" Kasumi smiled.

Shampoo nodded. {Yes, please.}

Akane rubbed her temples. "Honestly… Kasumi, I… I'm going to my room now. I need a break from this."

Kasumi nodded as she watched Akane walk up the stairs. "How do you like Japan, Miss Shampoo?"

{This country is very… Well, there are many buildings.} Shampoo shrugged. {Easily smashed.}

Kasumi nodded and drank some tea.

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Nodoka stood with her arms crossed facing her child. "Explain your actions, daughter."

"I told you, it's a long story-" Ranma was cut off.

"I have time." Nodoka frowned. "Now, tell me… everything."

Ranma took a deep breath. "Well, once I was cursed, I sorta went… crazy. Mostly from the shock and all."

Nodoka raised an eyebrow. "Define crazy."

"I… Well, I can't remember much about it, but I was told that I attacked Pops for one…" Ranma laughed nervously.

"Understandable," Nodoka admitted.

"Anyway, after that, I ran off to this Amazon village nearby-" Ranma was cut off yet again.

"Amazon?" Nodoka's eyes widened. "THAT kind of Amazon?"

Ranma scratched her head. "No, not really. They have both of their breasts."

"I see…" Nodoka closed her eyes. 'That's not what I meant, but… I'll find that out later.'

"So I entered the village, going crazy and being wild, when I crashed into Shampoo right as she'd finished fighting in this battle tournament on a giant log. Well, more specifically, I cut the log into pieces…" Ranma looked away.

"What?" Nodoka didn't believe her ears. "What did you say?"

"Well, as a cat, I… used my claws to slash the log into pieces," Ranma clarified. "At least that's what they told me. Shampoo fell, undignified. Yeah, it was awkward. But I was chasing Pops, so…"

Nodoka took a deep breath."I see…"

"And since he was a panda at the time, it was confusing, you know?" Ranma shook her head. "So, I'm tearing up this village, trying to kill Pops and we were captured… but only after wrecking half the village."

Nodoka sighed. "Go on."

"Well, fortunately, Shampoo's great-grandmother knew I wasn't alright mentally as a cat, as they live next to Jusenkyo and all…" Ranma trailed off. 'Not to mention that she knew of the Nekoken. Not that I want to explain _that_ to Mom.'

"She seems to have… cured the problem," Nodoka noted.

"In a way…" Ranma shrugged. "I can control myself better as a cat, and she helped me. For our time there, Shampoo took care of me, being my guide and making sure I helped fix the village."

"Good." Nodoka felt relived.

"Since she's a martial artist too, I wanted to test her skills and all, but they have very, very strange laws," Ranma groaned. "It nearly got me killed a few times."

"WHAT!?" Nodoka's heart sped up considerably.

"Yeeeaaah…" Ranma played with her pigtail. "If you defeat an Amazon and you're a girl… you… get hunted down to the ends of the earth and she kills you. So, to get around those laws, we had to play games instead of sparring. It was fun though."

Nodoka glomped her daughter and was shaking. "Are… are you safe now?"

Ranma pushed herself away. "Yeah. I was playing tag with her when we had to break for her to urinate; that's when Pops broke out and kidnapped me."

"Typical." Nodoka resisted the urge to curse his name.

"So, then she followed me to finish our game," Ranma admitted. "Surprised it took so long to find me."

"I understand… I hope," Nodoka sighed in relief. "I am afraid, though, that you and she… are not caring for your surroundings. Not to mention the… violence."

"Hey, it's in her culture." Ranma shrugged. "She's pretty nice when not competing."

"I hope so." Nodoka hugged her daughter. "I hope so…"

Ranma smiled.

"However, you still have no excuse, so you're going to clean up the yard." Nodoka patted Ranma on the back.

The pigtailed girl groaned.

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Shampoo licked her lips as Ranma cleaned up the yard. {Manly… Yes, very manly. I can see why your stupid father wanted you to sire children.}

Nodoka sat down at the table. "Shampoo… I realize that you are not from here, but, it would be… beneficial for all of us if you tried to blend in more."

Shampoo tilted her head in confusion. {Blending what now?}

"I assume that was a question." Nodoka raised an eyebrow. "You can understand me, right?"

Shampoo nodded. {I'm a great listener.}

"Right. Well, we can't understand you… so…" Nodoka coughed in her hand. "Excuse me…"

Shampoo frowned. "Shampoo no speak JapOhkneez too, too… good."

Kasumi suppressed a giggle. "So cute…"

{Oh, haha… Very funny, making fun of my speech.} Shampoo rolled her eyes. "Shampoo here… something… Ranma."

"Yes, we know." Nodoka took a deep breath. "Playing tag…"

"No, No, no… Shampoo… thing… cat…" Shampoo struggled to get her message across. "Cat… girl… girl cat… thing."

Nodoka's eyes widened. "What about my daughter's condition?"

"Shampoo… Shampoo cat… thing… girl… Ranma… ARGGGG!" Shampoo rubbed her temples. {I am in the process of getting a cure for her!}

Nodoka and Kasumi glanced at each other in confusion.

"I have no idea what you just said," Nodoka stated.

Shampoo sighed. "Shampoo stay, please?"

Kasumi smiled. "Of course you can! It'll be exciting!"

"Thanks…" Shampoo closed her eyes and rubbed her forehead.

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Nabiki licked her fingers as she finished her ice cream. "Lovely…"

Kuno struggled not to lash out. "Finally finished, Nabiki Tendo?"

"Hmmm…" Nabiki looked down at her empty bowl. "Perhaps. But perhaps not…"

Kuno was literally shaking in his seat, barely controlling his rage. "HOW MUCH, NABIKI TENDO?!"

"How much what?" Nabiki feigned innocence.

"GIVE ME THE PHOTOS!" Kuno demanded.

Nabiki blinked. "Oh. _That._ Why didn't you say so?"

Kuno gritted his teeth in annoyance.

"How much do you think they're worth, Kuno-baby?" Nabiki smirked.

"GIVE! ME! A! **PRICE**!" Kuno punctuated for emphasis.

"Alright, alright…" Nabiki shook her head. "Jeez… 5000 yen."

"**SHUT UP AND TAKE MY MONEY!**" Kuno shoved his payment at Nabiki.

Nabiki smiled.

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Ukyo Kuonji looked left and right, keeping an eye out for anyone she knew.

She didn't see anyone… at all. It helped that it was nearly midnight.

The moonlight was the brightest light on the outskirts as Ukyo walked into the bathhouse, her hood pulled tight.

The person at the desk was bleary eyed as Ukyo paid and entered the women's side of the bath.

*Splash*

Ukyo shivered as the cold water washed over her body. "That's cold!"

The chef put down the bucket and shook her head to get the water out.

She took a look around the room with a sigh. "The emptiness _still_ creeps me out…"

The bathhouse light went out above her head.

"Of course…" Ukyo groaned. "I was done anyway…"

Ukyo stepped into the furo carefully.

It was only slightly warm, but Ukyo sank herself all the way in. 'I hate having to do this…'

Since she started living by herself and gave up her femininity, Ukyo had to improvise in order to keep herself clean and sanitized. Bumping into people from school was… problematic at best. Rivers and lakes had to do at times, especially when money was tight.

'Why do I still do this?' Ukyo thought sadly. 'Ranma and I have made up; I have no reason to give it up anymore… and it's been… irritating to still have to do this… WHY do I still do this?'

Ukyo thought back to her childhood, years ago, when the other girls made fun of her.

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"Heard the latest? Ukyo got dumped by her fiancé," a girl with a flower in her hair whispered loudly to two other girls.

"Not only that, he stole the family business too." The second girl was even less quiet.

The last girl shifted her eyes to Ukyo, face in disgust. "Now she'll _**NEVER**_ find a husband."

Ukyo stood, not far away, spatula in her hand, downcast.

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'Devoted my life to revenge and Okonomiyaki… and giving up my femininity in the process.' Ukyo looked down at herself in the bath. 'But now what? Ranma was a girl the whole time, and I'm working so hard just to get by. And I can't get a husband now either… Who would want me? Either I was ditched by my fiancé, or I have to reveal that I was engaged to a girl! Every guy would laugh at me… again.'

Ukyo sniffled as she had another flashback.

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*Pomff*

Ukyo coughed as the dust filled her lungs, a consequence of being shoved facedown to the ground.

"Get up, GIRL!" one of the three boys towering over her demanded while holding a stick.

The four kids, only seven years old, were on a dirt path next to a river where Ukyo was living.

"Meanie!" Ukyo spat as she got to her knees. "Go away, you jackasses!"

One of the other two boys, this one with a hat, snarled at Ukyo. "We are not jackasses! You are! Liar! Liar! Lie-lie-lie-liar!"

The venom in his voice made Ukyo shiver. "No, you ARE THE LIAR!"

"Me!?" the hat boy spat. "No, you! You are a girl that said you were a boy! Liar!"

The other two boys nodded in agreement.

"I'm not a girl, jackass!" Ukyo growled at them. 'Not anymore…'

"Oh yeah?" The stick boy pointed his stick at Ukyo. "Then why are you wearing girls' underwear, girl?!"

'Oh no, they saw me with my pants down!' Ukyo bit her lip in fear. "Nuh uh!"

"Yeah huh!" the stick boy countered. "We saw you in the bathroom stall! Squatting! With girls' underwear on!"

Ukyo's face turned red in anger, fear, and embarrassment. "You jackasses! You're not supposed to look in stalls!"

"But you're a girl!" The hat boy yelled. "You're not supposed to be in the BOYS' bathroom!"

Ukyo gathered her strength and stood up. "Yes. I. Am! I'm no longer a girl!"

"LIAR!" The hat boy screamed in rage. "We saw you! You have a hole! A weird, STUPID, hole! YOU! ARE! A! **GIRL**!"

Ukyo crossed her arms to try and not shake in fear. "But… but I don't ACT like a girl! I act like a guy!"

"Shut up!" the stick boy sneered.

*Whack*

"Ow!" Ukyo seethed in pain as the stick cut her cheek, causing it to bleed. "Jackass! I'll get you for that!"

The third boy, who was very overweight and eating riceballs, finally stopped long enough to speak. "Shut up and make me dinner!"

Ukyo gritted her teeth. "No!"

The stick boy attacked again, but Ukyo dodged it.

"You are a girl, so you have to make boys food," the fat boy huffed out. "My daddy said so."

The other boys smiled.

"Yeah, give us food!" the stick boy laughed. "It's all you're good for, girl!"

Ukyo clenched her fists. "NO! I won't!"

The hat boy rushed forward, hand back. "You female dog!"

Before he could try and slap her, Ukyo punched the guy in the nose.

*Thump*

And he hit the ground hard.

"You are a bad girl! Bad, BAD girl!" the stick boy accused as he waved his stick around. "You'll never EVER be married, female dog!"

The hat boy was crying on the ground, but still tried to look tough by insulting Ukyo again and again. "Female dog, female dog, FEMALE DOG!"

Ukyo had tears in her eyes. "Stop it, you jackasses!"

"Haa haaahaa!" the fat boy laughed as he ate. "We don't have to listen to you. You're a girl!"

"Yeah!" the stick boy laughed as he stepped forward. "And MY daddy says that when girls tell boys what to do, they need to get a beating!"

Ukyo's eyes widened as the stick boy swung at her again.

The littlest chef backed up, dodging each strike.

"Whooo! Boys rule! Omnomnom!" the fat boy cheered as he ate.

Ukyo spotted her spatulas next to her tent, still covered in salt water from the sea.

"Stay still and get what's coming to you!" the stick boy complained.

Ukyo rushed over to her tent and grabbed her giant spatula.

"Like you can use that! Girl!" the stick boy taunted.

Ukyo smirked and swung her giant spatula.

*BONG*

Right into the stick boy's face, causing him to drop his stick.

"AHHHHH!" the former stick boy screamed in pain. "MY EYES!"

*BONG*

Ukyo hit him again, causing him to fall to the ground, unconscious.

*Plop*

The fat boy dropped his food and ran, slowly, away. "MOMMY! MOOOOOMMMYY!"

Ukyo sweatdropped.

"Female dog!" the hat boy yelled out as he ran away as well. "You are the worst girl EVER!"

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Ukyo hit the water in front of her. "Those jackasses! Forcing me to change schools and move closer to the sea… and showing why I make a terrible girl."

The water calmed down again, as did Ukyo, who was staring at her breasts under the surface.

"Even… even if I can be a good girl… feminine… I don't know if I can deal with… BOYS!" Ukyo shivered with disgust. "Oh, sure, when I look like a boy they're fun to be around, but when I went out as a girl to bath or to buy tampons, boys're just so… so… jackassy."

The water was starting to make her skin wrinkly, but the chef didn't care.

Ukyo rested her head on the edge of the bath and sighed. "What should I do?"

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"What should I do?" Ranma sighed as she rested her head on the furo's edge.

It was nearly midnight, and after cleaning up the yard, Shampoo dropped a bomb… although it took a while to understand it. Shampoo had decided that since she was in a foreign land, she would look to find a guy strong enough to beat her… and thus marry him. Nodoka found out about Shampoo looking for a boyfriend due to Ranma freaking out and encouraged Shampoo to help Ranma find one too.

Needless to say, Ranma elected to take a bath to "think it over."

"What should I do?" Ranma stared at the ceiling, hoping that it would give her answers. 'I don't want to alienate Mom. We… we just became a family again and to tell her I'm a lesbian… She would tell me to grow up or disown me! I can tell it in her excitedness. She wants grandkids!'

Ranma's skin was starting to wrinkle, but she didn't care.

*Knock knock*

Ranma blinked and brought her head up. "Who's there?"

"Me… may I come in?" Nodoka asked.

"Ss-ure, Mom…" Ranma stuttered slightly.

Nodoka came in and kneeled down next to her daughter. "Daughter, are you alright?"

"Whatever do you mean?" Ranma's heart raced. 'Did Akane tell!?'

"You have been in here for an hour already…" Nodoka's face showed her worry.

"Oh, that… um… Well, I was tired and all…" Ranma drifted off, looking away.

"I realize that… But I'm afraid there is something else… something… more." Nodoka rubbed her chin in thought.

"It's… well…" Ranma flinched. "I… don't think I'm ready to… have a boyfriend. I'm not ready…"

Nodoka couldn't help but giggle. "Oh, daughter dear… what a hilarious joke. You are more than ready; I can see it."

Ranma paled. "N-nO! Not that. I'm not… mentally ready yet."

"Oh, I see…" Nodoka tapped her lips. "I forgot that you have had very few experiences as a girl. Still, I'm not saying you have to get married soon. While I would be glad, there is no rush."

Ranma sighed in relief.

"But I do want you to gain experience in the dating world and look around for Mr. Right." Nodoka smiled. "Shampoo can help you. Watch her carefully and emulate her."

"Err…" Ranma's eye twitched. "I still don't think I'm ready…"

"I know this is a nervous time, daughter. That is why I need to push you. Why, if you don't show the young men that you are available soon, then you could end up old and alone." Nodoka frowned. "A terrible fate indeed…"

Ranma gulped. "Mom…"

"Now, find a date by the end of the week, or I will find one for you." Nodoka tilted her head. "Do not fret. It will be a group date… and I'll be close by just in case you need me. I'm thinking of a movie, one that's romantic…"

*Glub glub*

Ranma fainted, head slipping under the water.

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Ukyo crawled into bed and pulled the covers over herself.

The room was a mess, clothes all over the place, bills scattered on the floor near the dresser, and spatulas, spatulas everywhere.

'I really need to clean this place... but I'm too exhausted,' Ukyo thought as she closed her eyes. 'Just another thing to do on top of school, running my own restaurant, and figuring out if I should try to regain my femininity.'

That last one got a sigh out of her.

'I wonder if Ranma could help. She had to go through living as a guy too. Perhaps I'll ask her in the morning.' Ukyo smiled to herself. 'Yeah…that's a great idea…'

With that the chef fell asleep.

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"No, no, you're doing it wrong!" Akane fretted, panicked.

Kasumi agreed. "Shampoo, please move away. I need to apply first aid."

Nodoka paced the room fearfully.

Shampoo once again breathed into Ranma's mouth, straddling her in a way that their breasts rubbed against each other.

"GET OFF OF HER NOW! IF SHE DIES, SO HELP ME, I'LL KILL YOU!" Akane threatened.

Shampoo passionately kissed Ranma on the lips.

Akane's jaw dropped… and so did Nodoka's.

Kasumi gasped. "Oh, my…"

Just then Ranma breathed, coughing up water. "GAK… Ow… I had the weirdest dream… Oh, my head…"

"You're alive!" Akane fell to her knees, relieved.

Nodoka immediately rushed to her daughter's side. "Ranma!"

{I told you I know how to do it.} Shampoo smirked as she stood away. {And Ranma enjoyed it, too, too much…}

Kasumi knelt down and inspected Shampoo's handiwork. "How do you feel, Ranma?"

"Nude," the pigtailed girl answered bluntly.

Shampoo laughed.

Akane sighed. "That was close. Don't scare me like that!"

Ranma shrugged. "I don't even know why I fainted. Last I remember, I was talking to Mom in the bath…"

"Daughter, I just informed you that you should be looking for a boy to join us at the theater for a movie. That is all." Nodoka brushed her hand through Ranma's hair.

*BARF*

Ranma vomited, fortunately not getting it on anyone else.

"Ew…" Akane covered her mouth with her hands.

"There, there, daughter… It is not your fault. Nearly drowning throws off bodily functions sometimes," Nodoka tried to soothe Ranma. "Do you have any male friends, daughter? Those are the best ones to practice date. They are so nice…"

Ranma's eyes widened.

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{Your blue-haired friend is a bit… violent,} Shampoo muttered as she tucked herself into bed. {Threatening to kill me? Is that overprotectiveness? Or Love? Oooh… that would be nice. You have a great friend, little cat.}

"Nyaaa…" Ranma purred between Shampoo's breasts.

Shampoo smiled. {Now we both can't understand each other.}

"Nya," Ranma sighed blissfully.

{Oh well. I admit, you are extremely cute like this.}Shampoo smiled. {It will be a shame that this form will go away once I acquire your cure.}

Ranma fell asleep, rubbing herself against Shampoo's breasts.

{I wonder what it is like to be a cat…} Shampoo closed her eyes. {I'm sure it would be fun…}

With that, Shampoo fell asleep, dreaming of being a cat.

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Nabiki moaned and turned over in her bed. "Shut up down there."

Screams and death threats echoed in Nabiki's room.

"Dammit, can't a girl get some sleep around here?" Nabiki complained.

The sound of Ranma vomiting sent a shiver up Nabiki's spine.

"Ew… ewewewewew!" Nabiki covered her ears. "Great… now I'll never get to sleep…"

The middlest Tendo got up and entered her closet.

After fiddling around a bit, she revealed a giant walk-in safe in the wall.

"Doo doo doo do do…" Nabiki hummed as she unlocked the safe.

Akane announced going to bed and stomped up the stairs.

"Always so angry…" Nabiki rolled her eyes.

The safe opened, revealing an insane amount of money.

'Time to count…' Nabiki smiled.

The safe had the inscription: 'First Bank of Nabiki Tendo.' It was in gold lettering.

"One yen of Kuno's money, two yen of Kuno's money…" Nabiki started counting, a smile on her face.

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"Saotome…" Soun moaned in a corner of the boat, clothes disheveled, giant beard on his face. "I… I dunno how much longer I can go on…"

Genma didn't respond, body bloodied and his fur messy.

"Saotome…" Soun croaked. "This…is the end, then… *cough* Was it worth it?"

The wind rustled Genma's fur.

"I'll finally see you again, my beloved-" Soun closed his eyes and was cut off before being able to utter his dead wife's name.

*THUD*

"Hey! Moustache guy and his panda! Get off my boat!" the captain yelled. "We are in China. You are their problem now!"

"Huh?" Soun asked weakly.

*BOOT*

Soun and Genma were thrown off the boat and landed in the ocean.

Genma floated to the surface and shook water off his head. [Just as planned.]

Soun coughed up water as he surfaced. "SAOTOME!"

[Onward!] Genma pointed with his sign and waded to shore.

Soun facepalmed, taking notice of his beard. "I need a shave…"

[Schools united here we come!] Genma waved with glee.

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Birds started singing, neighbors played morning music, and a pet rooster cockadoodle-dooed.

Happiness was all around… except in a guest room in the Tendo home.

There, a cat sniffled sadly.

{There, there, Ranma. I am sure you'll figure out a way out of this mess,} Shampoo tried to reassure her friend as she petted the kitty.

"Nyaynayanyana…" Ranma cried. "Nyanyanaaa."

{At least you seem to be more aware now then when Great-grandmother started treating you,} Shampoo noted. {But it sucks that I can't understand you. And I speak Japanese too, too badly to try… although I might have to.}

"Nyanyaa?" Ranma looked up at Shampoo.

{Perhaps we need you to return to your normal self before continuing, and then we might be able to get an idea across.} Shampoo concentrated. "Bath time, kitty?"

Ranma blinked and pointed at Shampoo. "Nyanyuu?"

{What about me? Arrg, this is too, too frustrating. Come on now.} Shampoo picked Ranma up and exited the room.

Ranma climbed up Shampoo's arm and settled into her cleavage, riding like a joey in a kangaroo's pouch.

Nodoka was making breakfast with Kasumi as Shampoo wandered into the kitchen.

"Good morning, Shampoo. Oh, and I see that my daughter is with you too." Nodoka smiled.

"So cute!" Kasumi gushed. "Kitty Ranma want hot water?"

{That IS my goal right now…} Shampoo looked down at Ranma. "Want out?"

Ranma rubbed against Shampoo's breasts more, purring and looking right at Nodoka.

"So cute…"Kasumi cooed.

{Guess I have to do it the hard way,} Shampoo sighed. "Where pee place?"

Nodoka was too dignified to snicker, but she couldn't hold back a smile. "I'll show you. Be right back, Kasumi."

"Cute kitty…" Kasumi repeated to herself. "Ranma-kitty…"

Nodoka didn't pay attention to Kasumi as she showed Shampoo to the bathroom. She didn't notice that the sign was out….

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"One… billion… y-y-y*yawan* yen of Kuno's… money…" Nabiki droned as she counted, eyes nearly closed. "One… billion… and… and… … … and… and one… of… Ku-u-uu-uno…"

*Thud*

Nabiki fell over, asleep.

*Knock knock*

Nodoka stood outside Nabiki's door. "Nabiki? Time to wake up. Your sister and I are making breakfast. Also, coffee."

*SNOOOOREEEE*

Nodoka smiled and shook her head. "Nabiki, wake up. I have coffee. I know you need it."

*SNOOOREE*

Nodoka sighed. "Come on. You don't want to be late, right?"

*SNOREEE*

"Nabiki, this is why locking your door isn't a good idea…" Nodoka sighed. "I'll just leave this here."

*SNORE*

With that, Nodoka went back downstairs, leaving a cup of coffee next to Nabiki's door.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• ••

Akane Tendo hummed to herself as she sat in the furo. Here, she could take her mind off the stressful things in her life and unwind. No worrying about Kuno, or crossdressing girls pretending to be boys in school, or being engaged to one of those girls, or that girl turning into a cat, or a purple-haired Amazon who wrecks buildings playing tag, or the fact that her dad and his friend want to turn Ranma into a boy, or the fact that Dr. Tofu STILL wouldn't pay attention to her…

'Deep breath…' Akane thought as she did so. 'Remember what she said. Deep breath… Relax…'

With a smile, Akane sunk herself deeper into the water, actually relaxed.

*THUMP*

Shampoo slid the door open and waltzed in naked, Ranma on her head.

*PTHHHOOOO*

Akane spit out water in a stream, face looking ridiculous. "SHAMPOO!"

{Hello there, Madder Laws of Heaven and Nature,} Shampoo greeted as she walked in, hair barely covering her nipples. {May we join you?}

Akane's eye twitched. "I told you before, I CAN'T UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU'RE SAYING!"

Shampoo rolled her eyes.

"Nyaaaa…" Ranma nyaed.

Akane took a deep breath."Sorry… I just… Arggg… You two can come in, but wash yourself first. That is the rule here in Japan, Shampoo."

Shampoo shrugged. "Yes, please. Thank you."

Akane sweatdropped.

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Ukyo rose out of bed at the crack of dawn, cleaned up her room a bit, and wobbled into her bathroom, yawning.

The nude chef looked, bleary eyed, at her reflection in the mirror in her bathroom. "Even nude I don't look like much of a girl. Whatever…"

With a sigh, Ukyo washed her face, causing her to shiver due to the coldness of the water.

The world being much clearer now due to fully waking up and the sunlight pouring through the window, Ukyo saw herself much more clearly in the mirror.

'Wow!' Ukyo blinked in surprise. "Do I really look like that?"

Ukyo couldn't believe her own reflection. The girl touched the mirror just so that she could confirm it.

"How could I ever be mistaken for a guy?" Ukyo pondered aloud. "Why haven't I noticed this before? No… no time to stare at myself. Got a restaurant to open, remember? I own my own restaurant."

With a shake of her head, Ukyo peeled herself away from the mirror to stand in front of the Western-style toilet and lifted the lid and the seat.

The chef paused, a hand between her legs, unsure of what to do. 'Girls… sit while peeing. But I haven't done that in… I can't remember! Well, outside of pooping… but I don't think about it that much.'

Ukyo stared at the toilet, wondering what she should do.

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Akane sweatdropped as Shampoo and Ranma sat beside her in the furo. "Honestly…"

"What?" Shampoo tilted her head.

Ranma shrugged "Well, I don't see what the problem is. We all fit."

"No, it's not…." Akane sighed. "Nevermind."

{You are very strange, Akane. It seems like you can only be angry or calm,} Shampoo mumbled.

"What was that?" Akane asked, glaring at Shampoo.

"Bad Japanese, Shampoo is," Shampoo groaned. "Too, too bad."

Ranma laughed. "Anyway, I hope you won't get too lonely here, Shampoo. Akane and I have to go to school. But at least my mom and Kasumi will be here."

"Gak. I wish I didn't have to." Akane made a face. "I don't want to deal with the boys today."

Shampoo's eyes lit up. "Boys? Male? Penis?"

Ranma and Akane's eyes twitched in unison, both thinking the same thing. 'She's REALLY bad at Japanese!'

Ranma coughed in her hand. "Yes, there are these boys that bug Akane. Kuno is the worst though. Doubt he'll stop being a pain; won't stay down."

'Boys interfering with her? Won't go away?' Shampoo got an idea. "Shampoo go too."

"WHAT?!" Akane screeched in surprise.

"Yes, Shampoo look too, too mate. Yes." Shampoo smiled, head tilted.

"Whoo!" Ranma smiled.

*Glomp*

Akane facepalmed as Ranma squeezed Shampoo.

"So cute, so cute, so cute…" Ranma giggled.

{Ranma, what are you doing?} Shampoo asked, confused.

"Look, Ranma, while I accept this part of you, doing this to Shampoo is just cruel." Akane narrowed her eyes.

Ranma smiled. "She knows. And doesn't care!"

Akane's eye twitched.

{I don't know if I am following correctly,} Shampoo murmured. {But I do know that Ranma only enjoys the company of girls. It is obvious, really. Amazons don't frown on it at all… as long as you reproduce, that is. Even I occasionally like resting in the bosom of another girl.}

Akane took a deep breath. "Japanese, please…"

Shampoo groaned. "Shampoo… now… Ranma… Girl on girl is hot."

Ranma smiled. "Shampoo, do you know I am a lesbian?"

Shampoo nodded.

"See?" Ranma smiled. "All good…"

"All I see is two pervert girls…" Akane deadpanned.

{I am a pervert girl? Ha! You are a pervert girl!} Shampoo stuck out her tongue, pressing closer towards Ranma.

Akane gave up. "Fine, I'm leaving. Enjoy your bath… perverts."

Ranma rolled her eyes. "Shampoo, ignore that… Akane is just a prude."

"Hey!" Akane complained as she got dressed.

"Anyway, we need to get you a school uniform…" Ranma smiled wickedly.

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Ukyo grumbled as she exited the bathroom. 'Fine, I can go later. Stupid indecision…'

With a shake of her head, Ukyo got ready for work.

Hair was neatly brushed and put in a manly ponytail.

Breasts were bound with bandages, as usual.

Male boxers were pulled up.

Uniform was put on.

Spatulas were holstered.

Ukyo looked in the mirror one more time to make sure everything was in order and sighed. 'Yep. You make a fine-looking young man, Ukyo… You sure do…'

Shaking her head, Ukyo went down the stairs and fired up the grill.

The sign was put out and Okonomiyaki Ucchan's was open for business.

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The table was getting a bit crowded with five teenaged girls and a mother.

{Thank you for having me here. Your hospitality is remarkable,} Shampoo thanked between bites.

"That was positive, right?" Ranma asked, raising an eyebrow.

Shampoo nodded. "Yes, yes."

Nabiki yawned. "You owe me. Seriously."

"Huh?" Akane looked back and forth, chopsticks in her mouth. "What?"

{While I have no money on me, I could pay you by… other means. If you swing that way, that is.} Shampoo winked.

Nabiki nearly snorted her coffee. "No thanks. I do have other ideas in mind, though."

Everyone else around the table stared in shock.

"What?" Nabiki mumbled, taking another chug.

Kasumi tilted her head. "Nabiki, you understand what Shampoo is saying?"

Nabiki smirked. "Yeah, why wouldn't I? If you don't understand Chinese, then making money becomes a bit harder in Asia."

{Although there IS no Chinese language. There is Mandarin, Cantonese, and Wu, plus several other dialects. Our village uses Mandarin due to the widespread use of it compared to the others. Makes communication easier when we travel,} Shampoo explained.

"Makes sense." Nabiki shrugged. "Not that most people know or care about that."

Akane's eye twitched. "If you know the language, why didn't you help last night!?"

"Akane's right, Nabiki. That was quite mean," Nodoka agreed.

Nabiki closed her eyes. "Because I was tired. Besides, I'm surprised you didn't know, Ranma."

Ranma sighed. "I was only there a few days. Anyway… Nabiki… can we ask you a favor?"

Nabiki opened her eyes. "What?"

{I wish to attend this school with my good friend Ranma, and you and your younger sister,} Shampoo requested. {The reason is to find a strong male, but my excuse is to learn about the culture here. Can you help with this? I have been told that you are the smartest here. Knowing my native tongue convinces me of this. I am fluent in over six million forms of sexual acts. Want me to show you?}

Nabiki's eyes opened fully. "It will be a bit of a pain with no records… but they are very stupid. I'll do it, though I need two things in return."

Ranma sighed in relief. "What are they?"

Akane looked down at her food. "I have a bad feeling about this…"

"Nabiki…" Kasumi warned.

"First… I need Akane to carry me to school. I am way too tired to walk," Nabiki mumbled.

'Dammit!' Akane closed her eyes in frustration.

"Second… Shampoo, I think I can help with your search." Nabiki smirked evilly.

"Shampoo agree!" Shampoo answered quickly.

Ranma ate her food, glancing at both of them. 'I have a very good feeling about this.'

Nodoka glanced at the clock. "You'd better hurry."

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Looking like a male, albeit a short one, Ranma walked down the street with a super-smiling Shampoo and a grumbling Akane, carrying her sister Nabiki. All were in uniform and to an outsider would have looked like a normal, if a bit awkward, set of teenagers on their way to school.

Except they weren't.

"What do you mean _short_!?" Ranma scowled at Shampoo.

{While you are the ideal height of an eligible female, for a male you are very short,} Shampoo bluntly told it how it was.

Nabiki, nearly asleep, agreed. "Ranma, you _are_ short for a guy."

"Fine, FINE, I get that! But could you STOP SAYING IT!?" Ranma seethed. "It is really, REALLY ANNOYING!"

{Why? It is but the truth. You are trying to pass as a male, but your disguise needs work. Vertically.}Shampoo waved her arm over Ranma's head. {Sure, some males are short, but they aren't that attractive… unless you have a hidden treasure that you aren't telling me about.}

"Short guys are unattractive unless they're rich," Nabiki laughed. "Truth crosses borders…"

Akane frowned. "Both of you stop it, alright?"

{Fine, I will stop. For it does seem to hurt you. Your pride in your false masculine image is confusing, though.} Shampoo scratched her head.

Ranma clenched her fists to help control her emotions and glanced at Nabiki, awaiting an answer.

"…" Nabiki blinked slowly. "Nah."

"SHAMPOO!" Akane growled.

"Shampoo too, too… stoAppp." Shampoo facepalmed after saying that. "StoAAp. StaoP. StOOp… DAMMIT!"

Ranma took a deep breath. "Nabiki…"

"Look, a place that is open. Let us go inside for no reason." Nabiki pointed to the restaurant in front of them.

Ranma turned and saw the restaurant, eyes wide. 'Ranma, you can do this… just stay a little longer, tell them to go on ahead, and ask Ucchan to do something so crazy it'll never work! ARRRG!'

The pigtailed girl who looked like a boy didn't have the chance as Ukyo walked out of her restaurant and locked it up, a giant spatula on her back.

Shampoo's eyes widened. 'Wow… Now THAT is a man…'

Ukyo turned around, only to see the five girls there. "Hi, Ran-chan…"

Shampoo's eyes widened. 'They know each other! And a nickname! But why would Ranma have such a close male friend? It's dangerous. They wear the same uniform, so he is coming with us? But something is off here. It doesn't add up… unless… he's gay?!'

"Hi there, Ukyo…" Akane greeted.

Ukyo raised an eyebrow. "Why… are you carrying someone?"

Before Akane could respond, Nabiki answered.

"Akane is my slave." Nabiki petted her head. "Onward!"

Ranma laughed at that.

Akane grumbled."She's my older sister Nabiki… whom I'm considering dropping right now."

"Oh…" Ukyo blinked. "Same thing…"

Nabiki fell asleep again, snoring.

'Weird,' Ukyo thought.

"Shampoo, Shampoo… is Shampoo… China." Shampoo winced. 'Dammit! Stupid Japanese language!'

"Ukyo Kuonji." Ukyo bowed. "Now I think it is a good idea to get going…"

"Uh, yes… Yes, it is…" Ranma nodded enthusiastically. 'How am I supposed to ask her?!'

Thus, the five girls walked to school without any further delay….

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• ••

Tatewaki Kuno stood confidently in the school courtyard, a smirk on his face.

This despite the fact that he was beaten up a few days ago multiple times. It could be because he didn't remember it, though.

Boys surrounded him, many wielding sports equipment.

They were all waiting. Waiting for a certain blue-haired girl…

"Hope it doesn't rain again," a boy muttered, looking skyward.

"Me too," another boy sighed. "Still can't believe Kuno stood out here in it."

The two boys glanced at their crazy leader, silently admiring his strength.

Up in the windows, Sayuri and Yuka watched on, a half-bored look on their faces.

"Why do they even bother?" Yuka wondered aloud. "They never had a chance, and with Kuno being thrashed by Ranma, why even show up?"

Sayuri raised an eyebrow. "Well, technically, the fights with Kuno had nothing to do with Akane. It was about giant displays of machismo. In fact… Ranma hasn't seen the horde before, right?"

"That's right… Wonder what Ranma would do. Or Ukyo the Great for that matter…" Yuka noted dreamily. "He would beat them all. Giant spatula… OOoOoo…"

Sayuri frowned as her friend started drooling. "Like he would bother with a girl like you. Especially when surrounded by Ranma and Akane."

Yuka sniffled, mood darkening. "Meanie… I got to find a way to get to him! I have to make senpai notice me!"

Sayuri paused, struggling not to hit her friend. "How can he be your senpai… if you're in the SAME GRADE?!"

Yuka rolled her eyes. "I'm taking cooking classes, _duh_."

Sayuri facepalmed. "One, he doesn't know, does he? Two, he's a professional chef. Why, he doesn't have the time nor the interest to teach you. And he would be better than you at whatever you were to make him."

"So?" Yuka crossed her arms defiantly. "Guys like him are rare! I'll do whatever it takes! I hate being constantly overlooked, forgotten… ignored…"

Sayuri's face softened as tears pooled in Yuka's eyes.

"I just want to be happy. That's all…" Yuka whimpered.

Sayuri hugged, comforting her friend. "Look, I think it's hopeless, but… I'll help you the best I can, alright?"

"T-thank you…" Yuka cried. "You're always here for me…"

Sayuri repressed a sigh and looked over her friend's shoulder to the courtyard. 'And I always will be…even if it makes me unhappy.'

Yuka opened her eyes to see Daisuke and Hiroshi staring at them, noses bleeding. "What are YOU looking at? Perverts…"

Daisuke grinned happily, nearly bouncing with excitement. "Now, kiss!"

Hiroshi licked his lips. "Touch… touch her boob…"

Sayuri blushed. "Guys, cut it out!"

"Freaking perverts," Yuka growled. "Shoo!"

"What?" Daisuke threw his arms in the air. "All I wanted is for you two to kiss! It'll be HOT! But innocent!"

The other girls in the class glared at the duo.

"Sucks being the only boys in the class that aren't out there, trying to beat Akane up," Daisuke mumbled. "But NooOo… WE are the perverts."

"Boobs…" Hiroshi sweated, biting his lip. "Touch… touch her boobs."

Yuka groaned. "If it wasn't for Ukyo, I'd lose faith in the male sex by now. Wouldn't want anything to do with them…"

Sayuri's eyes widened.

"But BOOBS!' Hiroshi complained. "They… You have them all the time, yet aren't even acknowledging their existence! You cruel monsters!"

It was at that time that the rest of the girls had enough and beat the two senseless.

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The five girls nearly reached the school, when they saw a horde of boys. No, not a horde, a super horde! Nearly every male in the school was there, wielding clubs, bats, and sticks.

Akane, and thus everyone stopped in their tracks. "Oh, come on!"

Ranma stared at the scene in front of her with disgust, and annoyance. 'Right… Akane mentioned something 'bout this…'

Ukyo couldn't believe her eyes. "What the…?"

Akane groaned. "I don't want to deal with this today!"

Shampoo was unfazed, if a bit intrigued. {It appears that, by the reaction of Akane, this is a mating battle. You allow multiple tries in this country? Or are these just new people?}

Nabiki barely had her eyes open. "Akane is popular… They all want to date her. But, if you want to help her AND your cause, why not you beat them to a pulp instead? There is a strong male here…"

'Oh, great…' Ranma rolled her eyes. 'Encouraging her to fight Kuno. Like I needed to be around him more.'

Ukyo looked Shampoo over. "You fight?"

Shampoo smirked. "Kill."

Akane's eyes widened. "No, No, NO! Don't _kill_ them!"

Shampoo frowned. "Half kill?"

The other girls glanced at each other.

"Yeah, sure, why not?" they all said in unison.

Shampoo grinned evilly. {I will enjoy this.}

The purple-haired girl stepped forward. Giant, colorful maces appeared in her hands.

Coming into view of the boys, they all stared… mostly leering.

"Who beat Shampoo be husband!" Shampoo thrust her chest forward. 'I think I got that right.'

"Humana-Humana-Humana…" a boy near the front muttered, blood pouring out of his nose like a faucet.

Shampoo flipped her hair. "Come and get it!"

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Yuka sighed. "I feel better now. Thank you…"

Sayuri didn't hear her, for she was staring at the scene down below. "ERR…"

"Huh?" Yuka wiped her nose. "Sayuri?"

"Whoa…" Sayuri managed to get out.

Sayuri saw a purple-haired girl beat, no, ANNIHILATE the boys down in the courtyard. It was far more brutal than what Akane had ever done.

But that wasn't the best of it. No. The best of it for Sayuri was that she was very, very athletic… while not wearing panties.

Sayuri understandably fainted, blood gushing from her nose.

"Why do I feel wet?" Yuka wondered as she felt Sayuri collapse on her. "OOF! You can't… lean on me too much! Gah!"

*Thump*

Yuka and Sayuri fell, Yuka on top.

"EEEEEE!" a girl in the class screamed. "Yuka! Your back… You're covered in blood!"

As the teacher wasn't there yet, there was much freaking out.

'Oh no! Sayuri must be hurt!' Yuka looked down at her friend, only to see her out cold, blood dripping from her smiling face.

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Kuno looked on at the carnage in front of him, impressed. 'This… girl… this… WARRIOR! The intensity with which she fights... She must come from the ones of legends, the feared… Amazons! Ah, to have one such as she be placed before me, the Blue Thunder! But wait… these Amazons… They are attracted only to men with strength! To impress this creature, I, the Blue Thunder, must give my all! And once the Fierce Tigress, Akane Tendo, sees this Amazon acknowledge my worth, then… she will realize the error of her ways!'

As Kuno processed his insane logic, Shampoo breezed through the horde, a bit… disappointed.

"Weak," Shampoo spat with disgust, only taking joy insquishing the boys in most painful ways.

*SPLAT*

The boys were nearly all unconscious and bleeding. But alive.

"**MY LEG!"** one of the only waking boys yelled in pain, leg broken.

Shampoo calmly walked over to him, and stared him in the eye. "Lucky no die."

The boy whimpered, soiling his pants.

*BONK*

The boy slumped over, giant bump on his head.

Ranma, Ukyo, Akane, and Nabiki watched from outside the wall.

"Wow… she's being overly nice," Ranma noted, surprised.

"NICE?!" Ukyo and Akane screeched in unison.

Ranma blinked. "Well, yeah. The boys… err, boy… that bugs her gets way, WAY worse than this. Although it might look worse here due to these guys being made of cardboard."

Akane's jaw dropped. "Honestly?"

"Yep." Ranma nodded. "Made of cardboard."

Ukyo whistled. "Damn!"

Nabiki, who was still on Akane, pointed her finger skyward. "Cardboard, they made of. Yes. Hrmmm!"

Akane facepalmed. "Nabiki…"

Ranma pulled out popcorn from her bag. "Looks like she's going against Kuno now."

Ukyo raised an eyebrow. "I gotta see this."

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Ranma, Ukyo, Akane and Nabiki shimmied along the inner part of the wall of the courtyard until they reached the door.

"I'm getting tired," Nabiki yawned, still on Akane. "Carry me to my room."

"Oh, fine. Jeez," Akane grunted as she did so.

Shampoo turned towards Kuno, the last person standing. And standing he was. At 182 centimeters, he dwarfed Shampoo, who was only 157 centimeters tall. A ten-inch height advantage, however, was nothing for Shampoo to overcome.

"Big guy. Shampoo kill bigger," Shampoo bragged as offhandedly as she could, speaking Japanese and all.

"Yes, impressive you have been, Amazon… If I, the Blue Thunder, defeat you, you shall go on a date with me." Kuno pointed his bokken at Shampoo. "But if you win, I shall go on a date with YOU."

'Confident, tall, wooden katana… Yes, this might be the one.' Shampoo raised an eyebrow. 'But he seems a bit… off.'

Kuno smirked. "It is gentlemanly to allow the lady to go first, but thou art no lady. Still, I have nothing to fear. COME AT ME!"

Shampoo shrugged. "Fight 'til sleepy time."

Before Kuno could question that, Shampoo charged.

*BOOF*

Kuno dodged out of the way as Shampoo brought a mace down to the ground. The miniature crater was impressive to say the least.

As Shampoo bounced up, swinging the other large mace, Kuno deflected it with his bokken.

The two broke off from each other and started circling.

Kuno smirked. "Amazon, prepare to STRIKESTRIKESTRIKESTRIKE!"

Shampoo's eyes widened as Kuno came forward, bokken striking in and out at ultra-fast speeds.

The purple-haired girl blocked with her maces, but the air pressure pushed her back.

Shampoo felt her foot touch the outer wall of the courtyard and used it to jump up, rebounding off of it into the air.

The wall crumbled, throwing dust into the air.

Kuno laughed. "'Twas too easy."

*BONG*

The kendoist saw stars as one of Shampoo's maces hit him on the head, thrown from above.

"That… didn't hurt..." Kuno lied.

Shampoo landed behind Kuno. "Tough."

Kuno grabbed the weapon off of his head and threw it across the courtyard, where it disappeared from view. "Your move."

Shampoo frowned and attacked again.

Kuno was able to deflect the one mace… mostly. His head trauma affected him more than he would admit.

*WHOMP*

Shampoo got in one hit to his stomach.

Kuno fell to his knees, cradling the mace.

*Yank*

Shampoo swore as Kuno was able to pry the srcond mace away and throw it off into the distance.

"Crude, but efficient…" Kuno complimented as he stood. "But not enough to defeat me, the BLUE THUNDER!"

Shampoo got some distance away and frowned.

"Now then, Amazon, I have won… STRIKESTRIKESTRIKESTRIKE!" Kuno quickly began his attack again.

Shampoo dodged and dodged and dodged, biding her time.

Kuno backed her to the wall again, a part that wasn't broken… yet.

When Shampoo was against the wall, she smirked. {Game over.}

*SHING*

Using the wall as a launching pad, Shampoo bounced off, drew her sword…

*SHIN-SHIN-SHIN-SHIN*

And cut Kuno many times with it.

*THUMP*

The kendoist fell to the ground…

Those looking on from the windows gasped.

Ukyo gasped.

Akane heard the gasps and then _she_ gasped.

Ranma laughed. "Good match, Shampoo. Good one."

Shampoo shrugged and put the sword away.

Ukyo looked at Ranma in disbelief. "You know something, don't you?"

Ranma smirked. "Perhaps…"

Ukyo glared at Ranma.

Ranma chuckled nervously. "Shampoo's sword does something that makes the blood clot. It's weird. He'll be perfectly fine."

Shampoo walked over Kuno's head. "Not man enough for Shampoo."

With that, Kuno fell unconscious.

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"I can't believe we all made it on time." Akane looked in disbelief at the clock in the room.

"I know, right?" Ranma scratched her head.

The teacher took a deep breath. "Alright, class, settle down. We have a new foreign exchange student."

The class, mostly female, paid attention.

"She's from China, so let's all give a 'ni hao' welcome to Shampoo," the teacher introduced.

Shampoo waved. "Shampoo is Shampoo. Meet you please happy!"

The class waved back.

"Now… we all saw what happened outside today, so please, people…don't mess up this classroom. It was a pain to fix the wall the last time someone had a disagreement." The teacher glared at Ranma.

The pigtailed girl who looked like a boy whistled innocently.

"And apparently you know each other, since you came to school together. So Shampoo, please take the seat behind Akane Tendo," the teacher requested.

Shampoo did so with a smile.

"Now, with nearly all our male students in the infirmary for the foreseeable future, our lesson for today will need to be changed a bit." The teacher rubbed his forehead, trying to relive his stress.

Ranma looked around. 'Wow, those two guys in the back are the only ones here. Of course, to the teacher, there are also Ukyo and me.'

Ukyo smiled, able to resist laughing.

"Now please turn to page 404…" the teacher instructed.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• ••

Daisuke and Hiroshi sat in the courtyard, which had been clean up for lunchtime. Both were staring at Shampoo.

"Can't believe she did that to Kuno." Daisuke rubbed his eyes. "I mean, a full-body cast? You saw all those cuts on his body; I thought he would bleed to death."

"Yes," Hiroshi answered bluntly.

"Huh?" Daisuke raised an eyebrow.

"Yes, I can believe that," Hiroshi reaffirmed. "Know why?"

"Why?" Daisuke asked.

"'Cause she's hot," Hiroshi answered, taking a bite of his food.

Daisuke shook his head. "What? How does that make sense!? It must be because of her training. She's very well trained with weapons."

"And hot!" Hiroshi added.

"Really agile." Daisuke counted on his fingers.

"And HOT!"

"Warrior."

"AND HOT!"

"Uses her environment to her benefit."

"**AND HOT!"** Hiroshi insisted.

Daisuke frowned. "Yes; yes, she is. But what does THAT have to do with putting Kuno in a full-body cast!?"

"I've been telling you, it's 'cause she's hot!" Hiroshi put his food down.

"I'm still not getting it." Daisuke sweatdropped.

Hiroshi groaned. "Haven't you learned, man? If you're a hot chick in this school, you can do ANYTHING. It's freaking weird!"

Daisuke looked over his friend's food. "Are you sure that okonomiyaki is clean?"

"Yes," Hiroshi answered. "Look at it this way: Akane gets to beat people up every day, right?"

"Yeah, and?" Daisuke rolled his eyes.

"And she's hot! So Kuno allows her to cream him," Hiroshi explained. "So, what happens when another, HOTTER girl comes? Kuno gets so badly beaten it's insane!"

"Look, there are things other than the fact that she has boobs of steel that explain this." Daisuke rubbed his forehead.

"No, you see, because they are hot, they get super powers! It's impossible for a girl that size to do the things she did." Hiroshi banged his fist. "She only is able to destroy the laws of physics because she's hot!"

Daisuke sighed. "Fine, let's say you're right. Then explain Kuno, Ranma, and Ukyo."

"Well, they are hot… to GIRLS. AND they LOOK a bit like GIRLS! Haven't you noticed how much of pretty boys they are?" Hiroshi got into Daisuke's face. "Ranma is so short, Ukyo is a master chef, and Kuno is uber rich… which is another reason why he is still alive."

"And how is this not just skill?" Daisuke deadpanned.

"Easy," Hiroshi argued. "Because the athletes from our other sports don't break the laws of physics… and they are average looking at best."

Daisuke rubbed his forehead. "Look, not everything-"

"But IT IS a conspiracy!" Hiroshi put his foot down. "It's a conspiracy to keep guys like us from ever getting a girl!"

Daisuke opened his mouth to protest, but soon closed it again.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• ••

Ranma, Ukyo, Akane, Shampoo, Yuka and Sayuri sat around Ukyo's portable grill, getting to know each other.

Shampoo took a bite out of her okonomiyaki. {It is actually pretty good, I admit.}

"By the way you're eating… you like it?" Ukyo scratched her head.

"Yes, hrmmm." Shampoo nodded. 'This Ukyo chef is my biggest lead now that the one named Kuno has showed himself to be unworthy. But there is still the fact that he seems to be gay. He may not be, but, I'm confident in my guess. Pathetically, no other worthy males seem to be around.'

"Twold mya!" Ranma grinned, mouth full.

Akane giggled as she sat down a bit further away from everyone else, using the time for breathing exercises.

'Too bad Ranma isn't actually male,' Shampoo inwardly sighed. 'But I must find a mate… Perhaps I could show her some fun if her mother becomes too, too depressing.'

Yuka bit her lip, nervous. "So… Shampoo?"

"Yes?" Shampoo turned towards Yuka.

"Um…" Yuka twiddled her fingers. "What brings you to Japan?"

"Shampoo look strong man." Shampoo nearly gritted her teeth, trying not to curse her Japanese skills.

Yuka sighed. "Me too. So… got any tips?"

Shampoo raised an eyebrow. "Best man might woman."

"Huh?" Yuka scratched her head.

Shampoo took a deep breath. "Best man is woman maybe sometimes."

"Ooh…" Yuka nodded. 'So… Ranma is the best man? Oh, my head!'

Sayuri smiled. 'Maybe things will go alright after all.'

Ukyo sweated. "Um… Ran-chan, watch over the grill for me? I have to go to the bathroom."

Ranma nodded, food in her mouth.

"Now don't… eat anything from it, alright? I have to keep track of this stuff." Ukyo instructed before leaving.

After Ukyo left, Yuka whispered to Shampoo. "How about Ukyo?"

"Gay," Shampoo replied. "Shampoo pretty sure."

Yuka slumped, depressed.

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Ukyo locked the stall door behind her and unzipped her pants.

Not even caring or thinking about it, the chef started urinating, standing.

That is when two boys came in.

"I'm telling you it's a great idea!" Hiroshi grunted. "Why won't you accept it?!"

"Because they are surrounded by girls!?" Daisuke rolled his eyes. "What can we offer them? That new girl Shampoo is like a girl with a guy attitude… Probably like that sexually too."

"No, I'm serious. They need us as much as we need them," Hiroshi sighed. "Guys' night out? Allows you to be yourself instead of an uptight person… and staying away from crazy chicks."

Ukyo raised an eyebrow at this.

"Then YOU ask them. I'm sure they're free. It's not like they have a restaurant or are super martial artists or something!" Daisuke said sarcastically as he left, frustrated.

Hiroshi grumbled to himself. "Fine, I will…"

Ukyo stayed in the stall until he left, taking care of business.

After that she quietly left the bathroom, washing her hands first, of course.

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Yuka and Sayuri were at the ice cream shop after school, the former really needing it.

"It's just not fair," Yuka sniffled. "It's just not fair."

Sayuri comforted her friend as she dug into her ice cream.

"All the good guys are taken or gay!"Yuka whined.

"Let it out," Sayuri advised. "Just let it out."

Yuka whimpered. "It's probably why Ranma goes to school as a guy. Akane said it's complicated. What's more complicated than dressing as a guy so that your gay friend might like you?!"

'That's actually a good theory on what is happening,' Sayuri thought. 'It makes some sense…'

"I just wanna curl up and DIE!" Yuka cried, laying her head on the table.

*Glomp*

Sayuri held Yuka tight. "No… you don't want that. Please listen to me, Yuka. You must live!"

"'Til when?" Yuka asked pathetically.

"Until Friday…" Sayuri came up with a plan. "That new movie is coming out that you want to see, right?"

"Yeah…' Yuka admitted.

"Then let's watch it… together. Who needs guys anyway?" Sayuri suggested.

"Yeah! Who needs 'em!" Yuka lifted up her sundae.

Sayuri smiled. 'I'll make you want to live. I promise….'

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Shampoo and Nabiki were sitting in Nabiki's room.

{So, what do you want me to do?} Shampoo asked.

Nabiki pointed to her camera. "Just pose for photos."

{Oh, I see. You run one of those electronic markets…} Shampoo nodded in understanding.

"That's not a bad idea," Nabiki muttered. "But this is to help you, Shampoo. With your photo out there, men from all over the world would want their hands on you."

Shampoo's eyes widened. {You have the technology to do that?}

"Yep." Nabiki smirked. "So, what do ya say?"

Shampoo grinned sexually. {What position do you need first?}

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Akane sat in the dojo, meditating, eyes closed. Ever since Ranma tried to get her to relax, Akane had been trying to find opportunities to do it. It helped make her less… angry. And less angry was more feminine in Akane's book.

Which is just what she wanted to be.

'Deep breath…' Akane thought. 'Deep breath…'

Akane's breathing slowed, taking in bigger and bigger breaths.

'Relax… relax…' Akane repeated in her mind. 'Become one with the dojo… I am the dojo…'

The blue-haired girl smiled. She had finally found peace.

"Ohho ho hoho ho!" came a noblewoman's laugh. "So, you're the one who put my brother in a full-body cast… That is MY job!"

Akane's eyes opened. 'Oh no….'

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"Seriously?" Ukyo asked in disbelief at her restaurant.

Ranma nodded sheepishly, looking away. "Please, Ucchan! If I don't do it, then my mom will find some guy for me!"

Ukyo shivered at that. "Dating a stranger your MOM picked out? That is scary…"

"Please, Ucchan, you're my only hope!" Ranma begged.

"Look, even if I can pull it off, I have troubles of my own, Ran-chan," Ukyo sighed. "I have a restaurant to run, bills to pay… and… and I need YOUR help."

"Me?" Ranma asked, surprised.

"I… I'm having a crisis right now," Ukyo admitted. "What am I?"

"…" Ranma paused. "Human?"

"No, no, am I a guy or a girl?!" Ukyo asked.

"A girl, of course," Ranma answered.

"Then why do I look like this!?" Ukyo demanded. "Why do I dress as a guy every day? Why do wear boxers, bind my breasts… pee standing up!?"

"You gotta admit, the last one is pretty awesome," Ranma pointed out.

"Ran-chan!" Ukyo screamed. "I'm serious! I don't know who I am anymore! How do you deal with this?"

Ranma shrugged. "By trying some new things. Sure, a lot is forced, but I stick around because I'm curious."

"It's different for me. I made this choice myself." Ukyo lowered her head. "All out of petty revenge."

"Hey, that kind of theft happening to you isn't petty." Ranma place a hand on her shoulder. "Ucchan… do you want to be feminine?"

"I don't know… I am bad at it," Ukyo sniffled. "I'm a bad girl…"

Ranma shook Ukyo. "Snap out of it! You are not bad, you hear me?!"

"Then what should I do?" Ukyo asked, heart low.

Ranma smiled. "We help each other. You be my date for this thing, and I'll take you somewhere special. I can be very masculine too, you know."

Ukyo thought that over. "But… won't people recognize me?"

*Whoop*

Ranma smirked, holing a few magical combs. "Pick a hair color. Any hair color."

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**Author's notes:** wow that's long! Hope you enjoy it! Noy worked hard this time! So please, work on fanfic wiki page? Please? It'll get them to stop harassing me… Oh, and if you want me, the Text to respond to reviews, please leave a review saying that. Please? Until next time, I'm the Text!


	9. IIII IIII

Ramma-chan, the Cat

~Noy Telinú~

**Warning:** squealing like a schoolgirl is frowned upon unless you're a schoolgirl. And even then it's not that respected. At all. Which sucks really. Because cute things are cute! Right!? ^-^

You have been warned….

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_**IIII IIII:**_ Friday night dimmed lights

Akane stared at Kodachi.

Kodachi glared at Akane.

"Your job?" Akane licked her dry lips.

"Yes, my job." Kodachi scowled. "While my insane brother is not in any way fit for even attending school, he is still my brother and therefore only I, the Black Rose, may harm him like that."

"But I didn't do it!" Akane protested. "Honestly!"

"Now, now, no need to be modest. I know you fight my brother in the most gruesome and barbaric manner before school." Kodachi waved her finger at Akane.

"So then why didn't you show up earlier?!" Akane yelled in frustration. "Your brother has been bothering me all year!"

"…" Kodachi blinked and rubbed her chin in thought.

"Well?" Akane crossed her arms.

"Because shut up," Kodachi scoffed, still thinking the matter over and mumbling to herself. "Why haven't I attacked you before…?"

Akane shifted her weight awkwardly back and forth from one leg to the other as Kodachi thought about the situation.

"I mean, I don't respect him at all…" Kodachi frowned. "So no protecting family instinct. Hmm…"

"Hey, Akane, have you seen-" Nabiki walked in and saw Kodachi in the dojo standing over the youngest Tendo. "… Well, hello there."

"Silence, fools! This cognitive lapse poses great trouble for the Kuno clan! 'Tis not a trivial matter at all!" Kodachi scowled. "Wait. I know you… I have seen you conspiring with my idiot of a brother! What have you done?!"

"Look, I just sell photos. No big deal." Nabiki shrugged. "So you're Kuno-baby's sister, huh? Thought there was some family resemblance."

"Yes. So you're the one provides him with those hideous images of Akane Tendo…" Kodachi nodded in thought.

"What?! HEY!" Akane seethed.

"Count yourself lucky, Akane Tendo! For you have been spared today! I have felt generous and not at all confused about what transpired just now!" Kodachi lied.

Nabiki raised an eyebrow. "Hey, when you get back home can you tell Kuno-baby that I have photos of the Amazon?"

"Amazon?" Kodachi didn't see that coming. "What one-breasted monster are you talking about, peasant?"

"Eh, doesn't matter. He'll know what I mean." With that, Nabiki turned and walked away.

"Don't you turn your back on me!" Kodachi pulled a giant mallet out of nowhere and leapt at Nabiki.

Akane shot up and tackled Kodachi, sending her head right into the floor…

*CRACK*

And right through it, breaking a board.

"Perhaps you shouldn't turn YOUR back on ME." Nabiki smirked and went back inside the house.

Akane rolled her eyes. "A 'thank you' would have been nice…"

Kodachi didn't move, being out and all.

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Ranma gulped. This was the big moment. She couldn't screw it up. She had to make it convincing. Well, in reality Ukyo did.

"I, I have a date!" Ranma blushed as she talked to her mother.

"Oh, really?" Nodoka was caught off guard. "How lovely! I hope he is gentlemanly enough to come pick you up."

Her daughter nodded. "Uh, yes. Mmm-hmm. Of course!"

"Splendid." Nodoka smiled.

Ranma sighed.

"I would like to inspect him myself." Nodoka's eyes glowed menacingly.

Ranma sweated even more. 'What's with that look?!'

Her mother smiled and walked away. "You had best prepare, daughter."

Ranma blinked. "Eh? But it's tomorrow…."

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"This won't work." Akane crossed her arms as she sat at her desk, Ranma pacing the floor of the youngest Tendo's room.

"Hey, Ucchan fooled everyone. There's nothing to worry about." Ranma wiped the sweat from her brow.

"Then why are you making a rut in my floor?" Akane sweatdropped.

"Because it's nerve wracking!" Ranma admitted. "What if I screw up?! What what if Mom sees through it somehow?! What if we don't get done in time and something happens and then everyone knows I'm a girl?!"

Akane blinked. "Well that last one could be a problem…"

"Exactly! Mom wants me to wear that dress when I leave! I can't do that! Well, I can, but…" Ranma gripped her head in despair. "Anyway, what's with the girl in your room?"

Indeed, lying on a mat on the floor of Akane's room was Kodachi, a wet towel on her forehead and a blanket over her body.

"Oh, that. Well, she tried to kill me, so…" Akane rubbed the back of her head.

Ranma patted Akane on the head.

( T_T)＼(^-^ )

"I know the feeling," Ranma offered in sympathy. "So, what will you do with her?"

"I don't know, she's been out for a while now." Akane frowned. "She should probably go to a hospital or something but she hurt her head and, well, moving it seems bad since she broke the dojo floor with her head…"

"Wait, then why is she here and not in the dojo?" Ranma asked.

"…" Akane opened her mouth and then closed it again.

"She's alive, right?" Ranma had a concerned look on her face.

"Yes! Yes, she is! Just look!" Akane pointed at Kodachi.

Kodachi didn't move.

Ranma felt the girl's pulse. "Well, you're right. She is alive… Let's see…"

The redhead checked for any other damage but found none.

"Well?" Akane grew nervous.

"Seems perfectly alright. Maybe if you kiss her…" Ranma mused.

Akane growled. "This is serious!"

"I am being serious." Ranma turned to Akane. "It'll be hot."

Akane clenched her fist. "Ranma…" she warned.

Ranma waved her arms in front of herself defensively. "Hey, I can't see anything else wrong with her so I thought it might be like a storybook ending with a princess or something… You know?"

"That is a stupid idea!" Akane fumed. "It'll never-"

Kodachi shot upright all of a sudden and collided with Akane…

*kiss*

… 's lips.

Ranma's eyes widened as she watched the scene in front of her.

Akane scrambled away, blushing immediately. "W-what?! You! I! It!"

As she slowly realized what had just happened, a look of shock spread across Kodachi's face.

"Lies! This, this did not happen! Not at all! I DENY EVERYTHING!" Kodachi screamed and pulled out a pouch from her cleavage.

*POOF*

Akane and Ranma coughed as the room filled with smoke. As it cleared they saw that Kodachi was gone, leaving an open window behind.

"See? I was right." Ranma grinned from ear to ear.

"Shut up," Akane murmured, still in a daze.

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"Which way to Jusenkyo?" Soun asked a Chinese person.

^What?^ the Chinese person asked back.

[Hey, I know the way,] Genma's sign read as it came down on Soun.

*whack*

"Yes, old friend, I know you know where we are going." Soun rubbed his head. "I would just prefer a more direct path."

[What do you mean?] Genma's eyes narrowed.

"WE STOPPED TO EAT FIVE TIMES TODAY!" Soun screamed, his demon head coming out.

^Aiya! What is it with you Japanese people!^ The Chinese person fled.

[I'm just a harmless little panda.] Genma got a beach ball out of nowhere and played with it.

"YOU CANNOT DECEIVE ME, SAOTOME!" Soun roared. "THERE IS NO ESCAPE!"

The ground rumbled and Genma took off, fleeing for his life.

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"Don't tell anyone!" Akane glared at Ranma as they walked to school the next morning.

Ranma grinned back. "Are you sure? It'll be fun to see others' reactions…"

"Ranma!" Akane growled, blushing.

"I'm kidding, kidding…" Ranma backed off, still grinning. "I still will think about it though. And if someone reads my mind, oh well."

Akane fumed, murmuring to herself.

"Speaking of secrets, I need your help." Ranma tugged at her pigtail. "You see…"

"Ranma!" Hiroshi huffed as he ran to the disguised girl. "I got… I have to… *wheeze* I…"

Ranma and Akane stopped, glanced at each other and back to Hiroshi.

"Yeah?" Ranma motioned him to continue.

"You… You and…" Hiroshi took a moment to catch his breath. "Will you and Ukyo come join me and Daisuke for… For stuff, and everything… Oh, jeeze…"

Ranma raised an eyebrow and Hiroshi had his hands on his knees looking like he ran a marathon. "Stuff? Such as?"

"Well, Daisuke and I were going to the arcade…" Hiroshi wiped his brow. "They have Street Fighter there now."

Ranma raised her other eyebrow as well. "Oh, really?"

Hiroshi nodded. "Can you two come Friday?"

Ranma frowned. "Well… Uh… Ssssss… When Friday?"

"After dinner? We have snacks…" Hiroshi laughed nervously.

Akane rolled her eyes. "Well, they-"

"Yep. Uh huh. Yeah, we can." Ranma nodded, grinning.

Akane did a double take. "Wait, what?"

"Great! Haha! Told him! See you then!" Hiroshi took off towards school, reenergized.

Akane turned to Ranma frowning. "How can you say that!? You have a DATE with Ukyo! Do you want them to find out you're a girl?!"

"Well, yeah, I know, but a game night with other guys?! How can I pass that up?" Ranma shrugged.

Akane's eye twitched. "But you're a girl!"

"Well… Yeah." Ranma tugged at her pigtail. "It's… It's complicated. You see… I mean, biologically, yeah, but haven't you ever wanted to play video games? At all?"

Akane rolled her eyes. "And be around a lot of guys? Besides, don't you get enough out of real martial arts?"

"Hey, it's for fun!" Ranma shook her head. "You wouldn't understand. I just need to change after we eat and no problem!"

"Oh, and Ukyo will go along with this?" Akane put her hands on her hips.

"Let's go find out!" Ranma grinned and ran to Ucchan's.

Akane sighed and followed at a walking pace.

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"Why we at boring place too, too early?" Shampoo yawned.

Nabiki rubbed her eye. "Because I need these shots before… *yawn* the others get here. So you… Just… Hang on."

The middlest Tendo drank more coffee.

"So you need to lay on this desks sideways. Got it?" Nabiki grabbed her camera.

"Like?" Shampoo lay on the desks.

"Good. Now pull up the skirt a bit." Nabiki stuck out her tongue.

{I don't know why you subjugate your females with such impractical clothing,} Shampoo complained but did what she was told.

"Hey, it's not as cute as other schools, but…" Nabiki shrugged. "Supposed to bring unity and stuff to the students or something. Now smile seductively…"

Shampoo did so.

*click*

Nabiki had yen signs floating in her head.

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"So that's what they meant…" Ukyo mused as Ranma told her what Hiroshi suggested.

"Huh?" Ranma tilted her head.

"Nothing…" Ukyo refocused. "So they want us after we do our date then, huh?"

Ranma nodded.

Akane looked a bit smug as she waited for Ukyo to tell Ranma no.

"Well… Alright. We can do it." Ukyo nodded.

Akane facefaulted.

"Great!" Ranma beamed.

"But… But!" Akane got to her feet again. "But!"

"Well, I'm taking the rest of the night off anyway, so…" Ukyo shrugged.

Akane sighed. "Honestly…."

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Daisuke's jaw dropped. "No. Wai."

"Yes wai." Hiroshi nodded enthusiastically.

"I… I don't believe you." Daisuke was in a daze. "You're pulling my leg!"

"I'm not pulling anyone's leg! He said so!" Hiroshi fist pumped. "Street Fighter with actual street fighters! It'll be sweet!"

"Look, even if I do believe that you got them to agree to it…" Daisuke shook his head. "I doubt they would like to be called street fighters."

"Well, yeah, but that's a technicality." Hiroshi shrugged. "We need to get the snacks! Snacks, Daisuke!"

"Well… Ukyo didn't agree yet though." Daisuke rained on his friend's parade.

Hiroshi slumped.

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"Wow, what's eating you, sis?" Nabiki asked Akane as they dug into their food.

{Eat? It's lunch already? Did I miss something?} Shampoo rubbed her eyes.

"Nah, not really. School is boring anyway," Nabiki answered.

"Ranma and Ukyo are being stupid!" Akane fumed.

Nabiki raised an eyebrow. "Go on…"

"They… It's just…" Akane grumbled. "Go ask them!"

Nabiki rolled her eyes.

Meanwhile, a few meters over to the left, Ukyo was cooking. Ranma was by her side and Daisuke and Hiroshi were ordering food.

"Yeah, that's enough." Hiroshi motioned for Ukyo not to add any more meat. "So, you're doing the thing?"

Ukyo nodded.

Hiroshi stuck his tongue out at Daisuke.

Daisuke just shrugged. "Didn't think you two would really…"

"Eh, it's good to get to know other people and unwind every once and a while," Ukyo admitted. "Now, what do you want on yours?"

"Just a single pork…" Daisuke ordered. 'Have to save some money for snacks tonight!'

"Alright…" Ukyo prepared the food. "And you?"

"Co- chicken… Chicken." Yuka licked her lips.

"Right. Right." Ukyo made the food.

Sayuri glanced at Yuka. 'Just relax, girl. You have her to yourself tonight.'

"So… U-Ukyo-se-an…" Yuka fidgeted nervously.

"Yes?" Ukyo asked.

"Are you… I mean it… Uh…" Yuka pursed her lips.

"Yes?" Ukyo asked.

"Nothing." Yuka chickened out.

Ukyo raised an eyebrow. "Right."

Yuka glanced at Ranma, who was next to Ukyo, and sighed.

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"Shampoo know no right." Shampoo frowned, looking around the Tendo home.

"Just ignore it," Nabiki suggested.

{Where are the other girls?} Shampoo asked, looking around.

"Ranma's getting ready and Akane is trying to meditate in the dojo." Nabiki sat in front of the TV and opened a bag of chips.

{Ready for what?} Shampoo asked.

"Her date," Nabiki answered.

{What? With who?} Shampoo asked.

"Ukyo. Akane said it was something about getting out of dating a guy who would take advantage of her or something." Nabiki shrugged.

{Of course. Makes sense. Makes appearance of normalcy but without the risk. I heard this was called a beard. Double beard? If he is gay, that is.} Shampoo scratched her chin in thought.

'Gay? Interesting…' Nabiki raised an eyebrow.

Shampoo glanced at the TV and sat next to Nabiki. "So what watch on magic box?"

"Urusei Yatsura." Nabiki shrugged. "The main character is a lot like you."

{What? Now I must see this.} Shampoo pulled popcorn out of nowhere.

Thus as Ranma was getting ready with Nodoka and Kasumi, Shampoo and Nabiki watched anime.

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"Don't you think this is too much?" Ranma questioned, staring at herself in the mirror.

"Nonsense! It's not nearly enough!" Nodoka was shocked. "Now put this on,"

Ranma stared at the necklace her mother took out and placed around her neck. "Mom… How much is that worth?"

"Oh, don't be like your father." Nodoka smiled. "It just looks expensive. So don't even think about selling it."

Ranma sweatdropped. 'Should have guessed he'd do that…'

"There." Nodoka smiled and clapped her hands.

"Oh my, how lovely." Kasumi beamed. "Now, hold this…"

The eldest Tendo daughter thrusted a wooden umbrella in Ranma's hands, surprising the redhead.

"Oh, yes. That's even better!" Nodoka giggled.

Ranma sighed and stared at her reflection again. 'The kimono I understand and yeah, hair done nice with a bow… But the extra makeup and necklace and extra-tight sash… Ugh. So impractical. And what do I do with this umbrella? Sure, it rains a lot here, but it reminds me of…'

Her mother interrupted her thoughts. "I know giggling is cute and you should do that, but remember, no showing teeth. Oh, and if his penis is small, don't laugh. That's rude."

"M-MOM!"

"A-AUNTIE!"

Ranma and Kasumi simultaneously blushed and stammered cutely.

Nodoka tilted her head. "What? It is rude."

"But that… She is… Oh, they're too young to… Oh my!" Kasumi covered her mouth, embarrassed.

"N-none of that will happen!" Ranma resisted gagging. "Alright?"

Nodoka frowned. "That is beside the point. Do not laugh at his penis. Ever."

Ranma's eye twitched.

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{Oh, that is too, too spicy!} Shampoo winced as she watched anime with Nabiki.

Nabiki shuddered and for once had sympathy towards the male lead.

*ding dong*

Shampoo was on her feet, weapons at the ready.

"Relax, girl." Nabiki put her hand on Shampoo. "That's the TV."

{This box still confuses me.} Shampoo shook her head and sat down.

*knock knock knocking knock*

Nabiki sighed. "Kasumi! Door!"

Shampoo stood up again. {I'll handle the intruder!}

"What? No, no, no…" Nabiki grabbed Shampoo. "It's most likely Ukyo. Would be the right time."

Shampoo nodded, still glancing towards the door.

*knock knock*

"Hello?" Ukyo called out.

"Kasumi!" Nabiki growled. "Door!"

{If that is indeed him, would keeping him waiting be cruel?} Shampoo raised an eyebrow.

"Well, I'm not answering it," Nabiki grumbled. "If you want to though…"

{Unusual, but I suppose I could show hospitality instead of you…} Shampoo frowned and left.

'Like hell I'm getting up and walking ALL the way over there and walking ALL the way back here!' Nabiki stuck her tongue out in disgust.

"Shampoo say pronoun is Ukyo, yes?" Shampoo smiled and answered the door.

Ukyo blinked. "Uh, yes. So you do live here too. Ran-chan forgot to mention that. Anyway, may I come in?"

"Shampoo say yes." Shampoo nodded and walked back inside.

Ukyo raised her eyebrow and came in, shutting the door behind her.

"Hey, Ukyo," Nabiki greeted, eyes glued to the television. "Sure you don't want to buy photos of Shampoo? I won't tell Ranma."

Ukyo rolled her eyes. "No, I'm good."

"Well, I would sell you some of Ranma, but…" Nabiki shrugged. "Eh. What can you do?"

{Who you? Me you? Him you? You?} Shampoo frowned.

"Expression you," Nabiki clarified. "Anyway, about the girl of the hour of power… She's still powdering her nose."

{Powder nose?} Shampoo scratched her head, thinking what that could mean. {Cocaine? Before a date?}

Nabiki coughed, surprised by that to say the least.

Ukyo stretched her back. "I can wait."

"Yeah…" Nabiki coughed again. "Until then, anime?"

Ukyo shrugged and sat down next to the girls.

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Ranma stared at her reflection again. "No, I don't think the umbrella will be a good idea."

"But it's so cute!" Nodoka argued. "Right, Kasumi?"

Kasumi nodded enthusiastically.

Ranma sighed. "Well, I…I guess. Maybe…"

"Kasumi! Door!" Nabiki yelled from downstairs.

Kasumi shook her head sadly. 'Oh, Nabiki…'

Ranma glanced to Kasumi and then her mom. "Should you get it?"

"No, daughter. You must let the man wait," Nodoka explained. "And besides, Nabiki is more than capable of opening a door."

"Kasumi! Door!" Nabiki yelled again.

The three females in the room sweatdropped.

"So, can I go down there now?" Ranma asked.

Nodoka frowned. "Soon, daughter. Soon."

Kasumi sighed. "I'll let him in."

The eldest Tendo daughter left the room, giving the remaining females some mother-daughter alone time.

"Oh, I almost forgot!" Nodoka pulled out tickets from her pocket. "I got you two these. A film is a nice way to start things off. Relaxing, romantic, and if it doesn't work out at least you get to watch a movie!"

'Inochi Arukagiri Aishite?' Ranma took the tickets and sighed. 'Of course it's a romantic one.'

"After the movie, if it is going well…" Nodoka smiled. "There are plenty of options for a romantic dinner."

"I know, I know…" Ranma nodded. "So, when do I go down?"

"Right about…" Nodoka glanced at the clock. "Now."

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Kasumi came down the stairs and saw a teen boy around Ranma's age watching anime with Nabiki and Shampoo.

"Oh, hey, sis." Nabiki glanced at her older sister briefly before turning her attention back to the TV. "How's the girl of the night?"

"She's almost ready," Kasumi answered. "I presume you're Kuonji-san?"

Ukyo stood up and bowed. "Ukyo Kuonji. Pleasure to meet you."

Kasumi smiled. "And to meet you too. Please, just call me Kasumi."

"Sure." Ukyo nodded.

*clonk*

*clonk*

*clonk

Everyone's eyes turned to the stairs (especially since it was a commercial break) to witness Ranma slowly make her way down with feminine grace.

"AHHH! I'm gonna fall!" Ranma panicked, holding onto her mother's arm. "Whoever made these stupid wooden sandals was stupid!"

The whole group downstairs sweatdropped simultaneously.

Nodoka just kept a straight face, attempting to look as serious as possible with a panicky daughter glued to her arm.

"Come on, Ranma, you're a martial artist. Surely you can handle wooden sandals." Nabiki rolled her eyes.

"Only because they have socks!" Ranma was shivering. "You don't have socks and sandals! It's not right!"

Shampoo shook her head sadly.

Much more slowly than expected, Ranma was eventually in front of Ukyo. She bit more steady on her feet with a steady, flat floor beneath her.

"She sure is cute, right?" a smirking Nabiki whispered, elbowing Ukyo.

Ukyo nodded, surprised by the getup.

"So, you must be Ukyo Kuonji." Nodoka bowed. "I assume that you will take care of my daughter."

"Like I need to be taken care of…" Ranma muttered under her breath.

"Yes. Yes, I am. And yes, I will." Ukyo bowed back.

Nodoka studied Ukyo intently, scrutinizing 'him,' yet she was still unable to tell that the young man in front of her was actually a girl.

Ranma watched, trying to keep her cool but nervous inside.

"Since I already know your name… Age?" Nodoka asked.

"Sixteen," Ukyo answered.

'Same age. Hmm…' Nodoka nodded. "Do you still go to school?"

"Yes." Ukyo kept it simple.

"What do you do when not in school?" Nodoka asked.

"I have a restaurant," Ukyo answered easily.

Nodoka blinked, surprised by this. "I… I see. That is impressive for one your age. Very well. Do not worry about curfew. Take as long as you need."

Ukyo quirked an eyebrow. "Alright…"

'That was fast!' everyone not named Nodoka thought at once.

Nodoka nudged Ranma.

"Hmm? Oh… Uh…" Ranma blushed, turning away. "Please take care of me…"

'Unexpectedly cute!' Ukyo's eyes widened. "Yes, likewise."

"Excellent!" Nodoka clapped. "Now you had best be on your way. The movie will be starting soon!"

Ukyo and Ranma were shocked to find themselves being pushed out the door by the older woman.

"What… was that?" Ukyo asked.

"I… I think my mom likes you…" Ranma scratched her head.

Ukyo shrugged. "Well, yeah, but… Well, let's get going. So, what movie is it?"

Ranma handed Ukyo the tickets.

"Inochi Arukagiri Aishite?" Ukyo raised an eyebrow. "That's… odd."

"Huh? What do you mean?" Ranma asked.

"Well, you'll see…" Ukyo grabbed Ranma's hand. "Let's go, shall we?"

Ranma smiled and put the umbrella in her bag as they started on their way.

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'Ranma was right, that was relaxing…' Akane smiled to herself and exited the dojo, stretching her arms. 'Wonder if she's ready yet…"

"Good evening, Akane. Dinner will be ready soon." Kasumi smiled as she saw Akane walk in.

"Hmm? Isn't it a bit earl-" Akane saw the sunset through the doorway.

Nodoka was setting the table, smiling to herself.

Akane's eyes widened. "Ranma!"

"She left with Kuonji-san already," Kasumi mentioned offhand.

Akane's face darkened and she fell down on all fours, the area around her becoming gloomy and grey.

'I missed seeing them off…' The youngest Tendo had tears running down her face.

"Oh, Akane!" Nodoka saw the blue-haired girl. "Could you fetch your sister and Shampoo? It's nearly time to eat."

Akane sniffled, but let out a small reply. "Yes…"

Taking her glum mood with her, Akane reached Nabiki's room.

*knock knock*

"It's open," Nabiki called from inside.

Akane opened the door, her expression hurt. "Nabiki, why didn't you tell me Ranma was-"

The youngest Tendo looked up and her face went from pained to disturbed.

Inside, Nabiki and Shampoo were doing another shoot, this time, Shampoo was tied up, hanging from the ceiling, gagged.

"…" Akane's jaw dropped, eyes widened to the extreme and her hair standing on end due to shock.

Nabiki growled and turned towards her sister. "Look, come in and watch all you want, but close the door. I need consistent lighting!"

*slam*

Akane's eyes couldn't take it anymore and she left the room, gripping her head to cope with what she saw.

"Mphffmpfff!" Shampoo tried to speak but was muffled.

"You know, I can't understand you when you're like that…" Nabiki sighed and continued on with her shoot.

Out in the hall, Akane forcefully shook herself out of her stupor. She was blushing like crazy. "N-Nabiki! Why didn't you tell me Ranma was ready!?"

"Huh? Oh, right. Well, why do you care?" Nabiki asked through the door.

"Because she's my friend!" Akane cried out. "Did… Did she even mind that I wasn't there?"

The youngest Tendo girl slid to her knees, leaning against her older sister's door.

The middlest Tendo shrugged, not that Akane could see it. "Nope."

Akane sank lower.

"Then again, she was hurried out by her mom, so…" Nabiki added. "What, were you going to protest or did you want to actually see that movie?"

"No! It's just…" Akane trembled. "Just… Just get to the table. It's dinner time."

The bluette made her way back downstairs, slowly but surely.

Nodoka was beaming and went into the kitchen. "After dinner, I'm thinking of following them. As a precaution of sorts."

Akane's ears perked as she heard this. "I…I'll do it!"

Nodoka stuck her head out of the kitchen. "Pardon?"

"I… I'll make sure they won't do…perverted… stuff…" Akane stammered.

Nodoka raised an eyebrow. "Why would you do that?"

Akane was shocked again. "But I… You-!"

"I just want to make sure he is what he says he is, that's all." Nodoka frowned. "Gentlemanly, mature… Manly in general."

Akane blinked. "Oh."

"It would actually be a good thing if he got her pregnant. We need the babies, after all." Nodoka nodded.

Akane facefaulted.

"OH MY!" Kasumi's cheeks turned a deep red.

"Well, what if I did it instead?" Akane got back up. 'I can't let her know about Ukyo's secret!'

"I suppose it could be a good learning opportunity…" Nodoka rubbed her chin. "What do you say, Kasumi?"

"I think it's a great idea!" Kaumi had her hands on her cheeks, still flustered from before.

"Very well," Nodoka decided. "I'll give you some guidelines and you can report back to me. If they see you it would be easier to explain than if they saw me following you."

Akane sweatdropped. 'That was close…'

Nodoka went up to the room she shared with Ranma.

"Akane…" Kasumi beckoned her sister to come to her.

"Yes?" Akane did so.

Kasumi had her serious face on and gave her youngest sister a mallet. "Protect her virginity."

"…" Akane was surprised to say the least. 'Did she get this from Kodachi?!'

"Please take it…" Kasumi was still ultra serious.

"Sure…" Akane did so, reluctantly.

"Great!" Kasumi beamed, mood changing in an instant.

Akane shook her head and sat down at the table. 'What did I just sign up for?!'

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"Feels like I'm forgetting something…" Ranma mused as she and her date walked, arms linked, to the movie theater.

"What could that be?" Ukyo asked.

"How am I supposed to know?" Ranma rolled her eyes.

"Oh… Right. Sorry!" Ukyo weakly laughed it off.

They passed three boys from Furinkan, who stared enviously at the pair.

Ranma smiled like the cat she sometimes was, tightening her grip. 'Fufufufu… We look like a straight couple, just as planned! No one looking at us has any idea!'

Ukyo noticed the people Ranma was thinking about and couldn't help but smile. 'I don't know why I get so pleased when I do this type of thing. Could it be pride that a girl can get dates with more girls than them? No, just because they're boys doesn't mean they act like my former classmates. Must not think like that.'

The whole trip to the theater went without a hitch; no one stopped them. Ranma basked in Ukyo's aroma and Ukyo enjoyed bringing her friend some joy.

Nothing went wrong.

Until they were in the movie theater watching previews.

There, Ukyo and Ranma were spotted from behind by two familiar girls.

"It IS him!" Yuka whispered to Sayuri. "What is Ukyo-senpai doing with a girl!?"

Sayuri bit her tongue and looked to the ceiling, tears in her eyes. 'OH, COME ON! WHAT DID I EVER DO TO DESERVE THIS?!'

"Why go with another girl and not me?!" Yuka cried. "Does he have a thing for redheads? Is that it?"

Sayuri slumped, head hitting the back of the seat in front of her.

Ranma frowned as she heard talking from behind her, not that she understood what was being said. She was too into Ukyo to focus on the comments.

So she turned around angrily. "Hey! SHHH!"

"…" Yuka's jaw dropped.

Ranma turned back and snuggled against Ukyo's arm.

Sayuri brought her head up, mantra chanting in internally. 'Don't give up, don't give up, don't give up…'

Yuka turned towards her friend, mouth still agape.

Sayuri waved her hand in front of Yuka's face.

"It's Ranma…" Yuka muttered under her breath.

Sayuri blinked, then cleaned her ear, not believing her luck. "… What?"

Yuka repeated herself, as if in a daze. "Ranma. Ranma is dressed all girly and dating Ukyo-senpai…"

Sayuri beamed, mood vastly improved. 'YES! YESSSS!'

"Something is up…" Yuka still couldn't believe it. "It just can't- No way she would, he would…"

Sayuri's mind raced. "Maybe to please his parents, Ukyo… got a fake girlfriend, so Ranma decided to volunteer to try and get Ukyo to accept her?"

Yuka pondered the theory. "Well, that… Hmmm… It just… So, what do you call that?"

"A moustache?" Sayuri scratched her head. "No, wait. That's not right…"

"Poor girl…" Yuka shook her head sadly.

Sayuri shrugged. 'Oh well.'

"Look, the movie is finally starting…" Yuka pointed out and made herself comfortable.

And so the film began.

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It was an odd reversal to say the least. Instead of Akane grumpily sitting next to a girl who was eating way too fast, she was the girl eating too fast and Shampoo was next to her, fuming silently.

{Hastily eating food is so rude,}Shampoo commented.

"I agree, no taste that way." Nabiki nodded, erotically licking her food.

Akane gulped down what she had in her mouth. "Sorry, I was just…"

The youngest Tendo sighed and ate more normally.

Nodoka tapped her chopsticks against her lips. "Akane, you go to school with Mr. Kuonji, correct? What is he like?"

'Have to be careful with pronouns…' Akane paused and gathered her thoughts. "Ukyo is… hardworking, serious, and, well, nice. He… He is a martial artist and a cook. Ranma eats the food he makes daily."

{Yes, it is delicious,} Shampoo added.

Everyone but Nabiki stared at Shampoo since they had no idea what she said.

Nabiki couldn't resist. "Hmmm? Oh, she said he tastes delicious."

THAT got everyone's attention.

"Oh my!" Kasumi's thoughts went wild.

Akane spit out her drink.

Nodoka raised an eyebrow, intrigued.

{WHAT? NO! No, no, no!} Shampoo growled. "Shampoo no lewd act!"

"Nabiki!" Akane slammed her hands on the table.

"Moi?" Nabiki tilted her head, acting innocent.

Nodoka regained her composure. "So, you did not taste his sap?"

"Shampoo no do LEWD!" Shampoo stressed.

"Bad, very bad…" Kasumi muttered to herself, rocking back and forth on her cushion.

"Honestly…" Shaking her head, Akane stood. "Well, I'm off then."

"Right." Nodoka pulled out a notebook and gave it to Akane. "Here, use this as a guide."

Akane took it and left.

"So, Auntie, what would you say is manly? Twenty centimeters?" Nabiki smirked.

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'I think I understand now what Ucchan meant.' Ranma squirmed in her seat, eyes darting around the theater. 'But why would Mom pick this?! Is she psychic?! Does she know about Ucchan and the ruse?!'

Sayuri was also squirming in her seat. 'Does she like it? I hope she gets the message. What if Yuka's disgusted?! Oh, please work!'

Her sorta date squirmed as well. 'Is this something about Ranma? Did she pick this movie to tell Ukyo she wants to be a guy? I've got to ask them what's going on!'

Ukyo didn't squirm, but she was bored… and critical. 'Oh, that's unrealistic. And that's so cheesy! Who makes this stuff?!'

In short, because of reasons, none of those four enjoyed the movie of an adaptation of the classic _The Rose of Versailles_. Despite it being kinda relevant for them.

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"It's true! I'm serious!" one of the Furinkan students from earlier that don't even have names informed Daisuke and Hiroshi at the arcade. "Ukyo was with this hot chick! Seriously HOT! Flaming red hair and everything!"

"He's dating a gajin?!" Hiroshi's eyes widened.

"You'd think so but she was so… Japanese…" The guy with no name couldn't believe his own words.

Daisuke rubbed his chin. "I see. So he's after flat-chested girls…"

"No, no, no! Not like that, you perverted idiot!" the nameless guy complained. "She was dressed traditionally and was so cute and…"

"Woah, woah, woah, slow down there." Hiroshi grabbed the guy by the shoulders. "Getting attached to someone's girlfriend is not a good move. Especially if they can kick your donkey as well as Ukyo can."

"Yeah, you don't even have a name!" Daisuke pointed out rudely.

The guy who had no name was shocked. "What?! I do so have a name!"

"Yeah, what is it?" Daisuke crossed his arms.

*DINGDINGDINGDINGDING*

Loud noises interrupted the nameless guy as a bell rang on one of the machines in the arcade.

[$A WINNAR IS YOU!$] declared the text on the flashing screen.

Hiroshi's jaw dropped. "Who brings a NES into an arcade and plays an American port?"

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"Alright, now what is going on here?" Yuka crossed her arms, glaring at the couple in front of her in the lobby after the movie.

"None of your business?" Ranma shrugged, body wrapped around Ukyo's arm.

Sayuri and Ukyo sighed at the same time, facepalming at the antics of their dates.

"You don't normally dress like this! How can I compete when you dress like this?!" Yuka whined, tears forming in her eyes.

'Uh oh.' Sayuri grabbed Yuka's shoulders. "Yuka…"

"Make up your mind, you… you… both of you!" Yuka stormed off, crying.

Ukyo cringed.

"Bleh!" Ranma stuck out her tongue and dragged Ukyo away through another exit.

"What… was that?" Ukyo muttered to Ranma.

"Stupid jealous girl… stuff." Ranma frowned. "Yuka has a crush on you…"

Ukyo did a double take. "Wh-wha- Really?"

"Yep." Ranma snorted. "Why couldn't I see it before…? Well, too bad! Anyway, this way to the food!"

'I'm going to have to talk to her…' Ukyo thought as she was dragged off to a restaurant that was not hers.

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'The movie should be over by now…' Akane frowned, glancing at the movie theater from a nearby cafe.

"If he hates me why doesn't he just say it!?" Yuka cried, running out of the theater.

*PTOOOH*

Akane spat out her tea. 'YUKA?!'

"I'm sure it is not like that!" Sayuri tried to reason with her, chasing after her best friend.

'SAYURI!' Akane watched in shock. 'What are they doing here?! Oh no. Oh no oh no Oh no…'

"Why won't Ukyo-senpai notice me…?" Yuka cried into Sayuri's chest.

*THUMP*

Akane facefaulted right onto the table, startling the people around her.

"W-what if he's faking being gay because… because he hates me?!" Yuka sobbed.

'I have to fix this!' Akane stood up. 'No way I…'

Just then, she saw Ukyo and Ranma run off in another direction.

'But I'm supposed to keep an eye on those two!' Akane gripped her head in frustration. 'GAH!'

Her eyes darted from Yuka and Sayuri to Ranma and Ukyo, indecision stressing her out.

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Ranma smiled as she sat across Ukyo at the restaurant. 'Wonder if she wants to eat me? My body is definitely ready…'

Ukyo glanced around, feeling the place out. 'Nice use of lighting. Decorations could use work though… Seems a bit too upper class for my taste. Ran-chan's mom has expensive taste or something…'

That's when the waitress came by, dressed similar to Ranma only more traditional somehow. "Good evening, Master and Mistress. How may I serve you this evening?"

Ukyo rolled her eyes at the obvious appeal they were aiming for with that performance.

Ranma didn't seem to care or notice. "Ooh, I'll take the miso soup with rice… And the noodles… Oh, also the sushi. And can I get some melon bread?"

"…" The waitress stared at the redhead. "Are… Are you going to eat all that?"

Ranma frowned. "Well, I was saving room for dessert but I can't seem to find any parfaits on the menu. So add some stir-fry vegetables and some more rice with - Ooh! Sourdough!"

The waitress's jaw dropped and was quickly covered by her hand. "Is… Is this a… prank?"

"Hey, what's that supposed to mean?! I thought you had to obey me!" Ranma pouted.

"Y-yes, of course, Mistress…" The waitress trembled. "And you… Master?"

'Damn Ran-chan's stomach. She's going to bankrupt me!' Ukyo kept as calm as she could. "Just sushi…"

The waitress nodded and left.

'I hope the guys have snacks…' Ukyo sighed.

"Not hungry?" Ranma asked, concern on her face.

Ukyo sweatdropped. "Got money?"

"… No." Ranma looked away.

"Well, I'm going to lose a lot here…" Ukyo shook her head. "If I didn't like you so much you would owe me big time."

"It's alright." Ranma reached into her bag and pulled something out. "I have a coupon!"

Ukyo couldn't help but smile as she saw Ranma with her big derpy grin holding a coupon.

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Akane bit her lip and ran after Ukyo and Ranma. 'Sayuri can deal with Yuka for now…'

It didn't take too long for the youngest Tendo to catch up; after all, she was a martial artist.

But when she did catch up she ran into a problem: Namely, how to watch the couple when they're inside the restaurant.

'Why do I feel like something really stupid is going to happen?' Akane sweatdropped as she stood outside, plotting her next move. 'I mean, am I really going to sneak into a place just to spy on two of my friends?'

As Akane shook her head for just thinking about it, she saw a discarded uniform for said restaurant hanging haphazardly over the lip of the dumpster at the side of the building.

'No, no, no, no!' Akane yelled in her head. 'This is too stupid. Besides, this is all because of Auntie, not because I want to see them and give them a piece of my mind…'

The blue-haired girl huffed and walked away from the entrance, eyes glued to that outfit.

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Sayuri took Yuka to the cafe Akane was at earlier, offering support.

"Hey, how about ice cream?" Sayuri asked, trying to cheer up Yuka. "A girl as pretty as you deserves some ice cream."

Yuka sniffed. "R-really? You think I'm pretty?"

"Of course!" Sayuri held her friend. "And I'm not just saying that to make you feel good."

Yuka wiped her face. "If… If you really think so, then… then what a-about me i-is pretty?"

Sayuri looked her right in the eyes. "Your smile, the cheerful way you try your best despite the odds, the way you giggle when you see something cute, the joy on your face when you eat something delicious… That is what makes you pretty, when you enjoy life. And that… that is something I'd do anything to see again."

"Oh, Sayuri!" Yuka glomped her friend and cried. "You're the best friend a girl could ask for."

'Even when it hurts…' Sayuri kept her disappointment from Yuka.

That was the scene Akane found when she caught up with them moments later.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Akane asked as she arrived, worry on her face.

"What? Nothing!" Yuka lied, turning away.

Sayuri blushed. "Yeah, nothing's wrong at all."

"But you…" Akane fumbled her words. "That… I mean…"

"Wait… Akane, why do you even think anything's wrong? Are you following us?" Yuka asked, suspicion in her voice.

"What?! No, I…" Akane's eyes darted left and right.

"And what's that you're hiding behind your back?" Sayuri asked, trying to get a peek.

"N-Nothing! Why do you think I'm hiding stuff from you?!" Akane blushed, flustered. "Dummies… I'm not lying, you're lying!"

"What? No!" Yuka's arms waved up and down so fast they were blurs.

"You're being sneaky!" Sayuri pointed at Akane.

Akane took a step back. "No, you're just being paranoid! Honestly!"

The youngest Tendo took a step back.

*crash*

And tripped over her own feet, falling down. Also revealing what she had behind her back.

"Is… that a waitress outfit?" Yuka asked, raising an eyebrow.

Akane covered her face.

"Oh, you got a job!" Sayuri beamed. "You're so cool…"

"Waitress…" Yuka's eyes widened. "No, not you too! You're Ukyo-senpai's new waitress, aren't you!? How could you?!"

"Eh?" Akane got up. "No! You've got it all wrong!"

Yuka glomped Sayuri. And Sayuri held her close.

Akane bit her lip. 'I can't tell them I was almost going to spy on Ranma and Ukyo… What do I do?!'

"There, there…" Sayuri patted Yuka on the head.

( T_T)＼(^-^ )

Akane rubbed her temples, eyes shut. "Honestly…."

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Ukyo sweatdropped as she stared at the pile of food between her and her date. 'Where does Ran-chan put it all?'

Ranma meanwhile was slurping through the food like a camel with water. "Omn omn omn omn omn omn omn omn…"

It was such a sight even the waitress was staring, eyes becoming tiny dots.

*clunk*

Ranma slammed the last bowl on the table. "That stuff was good…"

"I can see that…" Ukyo's eye twitched. 'Should I be lucky that Ran-chan only eats two of mine a day?!'

"Uh huh…" Ranma nodded, slumping in her chair, a giant smile on her face. "Oh yeah…"

"My boss is going to kill me…" The waitress whimpered and looked over the coupon Ranma gave her. 'But who would have thought a "free food for your date" coupon would backfire like this?!'

"Ready?" Ukyo asked, standing up.

"Nah, I'm too FAT!" Ranma giggled and fell out of her chair.

*WHAM*

The table jumped a bit, causing the dishes to shake.

Ukyo sighed and paid for the food. "Come on, let's go."

And so she dragged her date out the door.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

"They're not coming, are they?" Hiroshi sighed, leaning on an arcade machine.

Daisuke sighed. "Ukyo? Not with a hot girlfriend… Was sure at least Ranma would though. This sucks."

*CRACK*

*BOOM*

The sudden glow of lightning shined through the windows.

Hiroshi's eye twitched. "And we aren't getting home anytime soon with this weather…"

"Nyraa!" a cat shrieked.

That got people's heads to turn and turn they did. Turned to Ranma, who was held by Ukyo, since Ranma was now a cat.

"We had an umbrella and we STILL got wet!" Ukyo fumed as she came inside.

"Ukyo!" Daisuke ran to her, arms extended. "You came!"

*WHAM*

Ukyo smacked him with her giant spatula. "Don't touch me."

Ranma hissed at him.

"Ow…" Daisuke moaned.

Hiroshi scratched his head. "So… what happened to your date person that you went out with because girlfriend and stuff?"

Ukyo glared at him. "Shut up."

"K." Hiroshi gulped and backed up.

Ranma quickly spotted the _Street Fighter_ game and dashed over to it, jumping onto the controls.

"Hey, cat! Get off!" Daisuke got up from the floor and ran towards the cat he had no idea was Ranma.

"NYAA!" Ranma cried, cuddling the joystick like a magic ring.

Daisuke grabbed Ranma and tried to pull her off. "Get off, you stupid cat! You're ruining everything!"

"Leave her alone," Ukyo ordered, going over to the machine as well.

"What, is it your pet or something?" Daisuke asked, unable to pry Ranma off the game.

"Ran-chan's…" Ukyo lied.

"Where is Ranma anyway?" Hiroshi asked.

"Who knows? Let's just start already! Damn you, cat!" Daisuke grunted as he failed to pry Ranma away.

"I said to leave her alone." Ukyo frowned.

"But it won't-" Daisuke was cut off by an angry Ranma.

*Scratch*

"GAH!" Daisuke let go and fell on the floor again.

"I told you…" Ukyo sighed.

"Great, how are we supposed to play now?!" Daisuke pouted.

Hiroshi shrugged. "Let the cat play first."

Daisuke couldn't believe his ears. O_o

Ukyo smirked. "Alright, sounds great."

"You cannot be serious…" Daisuke pulled his hair in frustration.

Ukyo responded by putting a coin in the machine.

Daisuke threw his arms up and sat back down, arms crossed. "You two are insane."

Hiroshi sat next to him. "Ah, who cares? It'll get bored and then we can play."

"I guess…" Daisuke murmured.

*MASH MASH MASH MASH MASH MASH MASH*

The two best friends blinked and stood up as they saw the cat mash buttons like a pro, demolishing her CPU opponent.

"NYAA!" Ranma raised her paws into the air, beaming with joy.

"No way…" Hiroshi rubbed his eyes.

"It-It's not possible…" Daisuke stammered.

Soon a crowd formed and Ranma kept playing, crushing the opposition easily.

'Has she played this before?' Ukyo wondered as she watched.

"The AI is busted." Daisuke grabbed the second-player joystick. "Let's see you play against a real opponent!"

"Nyaaaa…" Ranma smiled. =^-^=

*MASH MASH MASH MASH MASH MASH MASH*

Daisuke fell to his knees once again, this time in total shock as he was beaten by a cat.

"My turn!" Hiroshi shoved Daisuke out of the way.

And was defeated just the same.

For two hours people kept challenging Ranma to _Street Fighter_ and she won. Every. Single. Time.

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"'Cat beats people at video game'?" A cloaked figure smirked as they read the newspaper. "I found you now, Saotome…"

The figure laughed evilly.

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**Author's notes: **FINALLY! An update! WHOOO! We didn't forget about this! Honest! Tune in next time which will be eventually for I am the Text!


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